


You don't want me (so don't cry when i'm gone)

by Cesire



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Allura (Voltron) Being an Asshole, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angry Hunk (Voltron), Angry Pidge | Katie Holt, Bilingual Lance (Voltron), Coran is the best, Cuban Lance (Voltron), Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hurt Lance (Voltron), Insecure Lance (Voltron), Lance (Voltron) Needs a Hug, Lance (Voltron)-centric, Lotor is good, POV Lance (Voltron), POV Pidge | Katie Holt, Protective Lance (Voltron), Shiro (Voltron) Being an Asshole, Sniper Lance (Voltron), Space Uncle Coran (Voltron), Tags May Change, and galra too, lance friends with the blade, lance helps everybody, lance is good whit language, lance is the glue, lance is the heart of voltron, lance knows altean, why they cant see it
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-13
Updated: 2020-06-20
Packaged: 2020-08-13 16:15:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 24
Words: 90,180
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20177143
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cesire/pseuds/Cesire
Summary: Everybody wants to matter but some needs to work harder for it than others. When you give everything you have to them but they only hurt you in return, would you smile and go with it? For a while yes, but at some point enough is enough.  You need to move on. Maybe in Earth it was easier but Lance is strong and he will not let this group of people he once called family make him weak.So there's only one way, he needs to go. But where?Sometimes the answer comes in unexpected ways with unexpected people.This new group is different? Can you call them family from your hearth?





	1. Hello, my name is Lance McClain

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! I'm Cesire <3  
This is my first fanfic.  
I have this idea for a long time now and i finally get enough willpower to write it down!  
I hope you will like it, have fun <3  
Time set after the Lion swap and they have Shiro back (not the clone)
> 
> How its working *deep thoughts* i dont own Voltron or its characters, its completely popped out of my head to give more love to our favorite Blue Paladin <3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There are different personalities in the world and one would think he knows the other, but you never can truly understand somebody.  
You can't judge somebody only from the outer layer.

There are different types of people in this world.

You walk on the streets and see someone loud and happy with a group of friends, a loner, a happy go lucky and easy going guy or a genius who's lost in his head. But there are a lot more.

Let's see this group of heroes. A ten thousand old girl who's just royalty to her very core, a man who is like an uncle who is respected by everybody and always there to help you when you don't even know you need it. A fighter, a leader and a solid isle man in the chaos of our universe and his little brother who's a hothead, a 'never think before do' personality and a cinnamon roll inside of the loner mask. A genius girl, a hacker, the one who if she takes something in her head, you know she will do it no matter what and the giant cinnamon roll who's a genius engineer and baker and the one who makes the room warm and always supports you. And last, there is the support, the one hiding behind loud bravado and wide smiles and makes you happy and stable in the worse situations, the one who brings joy and light in the worse situations. The one who got your back no matter what but you never know, never care enough to notice.

You guessed right, that's pathetic creature is me, my name is Lance McClain, ranged combat specialist, former Paladin of the Blue Lion, Paladin of the Red Lion... and a goofball, a flirt...a joke... if you ask the team.

But you can never know a book just from the cover. I can tell you a little more about myself before we jump in the deep water whats called Voltron and the mighty heroes and their issues. 

I have a large family from Cuba, I have a loving Mother, Father, two older brother, Marco and Louis, two older sisters, Veronica and Rachel, and a sister-in-law, Lisa. And I have two incredibly cute nieces and nephew, Nadia and Sylvio.   
I have an easy-going personality and I can always befriend everybody, but I have the bare minimum of friends that I can be truly sincere with (okay, only one) and his name is Hunk. We are best friends from the nursery and I thought that we will be for the rest of our life, but I was wrong...Because if a giant Blue Lion takes you to the space to fight with angry purple cat-bat aliens for the freedom of the universe with only seven people on a too big and empty castle then you cant just stay friends. You need to take roles, and what if your role is the goofball, the seventh wheel? What if you only do things to make it easier for the team and make them happy even if you are drowning in insecurity and guilt from all the kills you need to make to defend the universe and the really, REALLY ungrateful group of teens and aliens who are your family? Then something like a life long friendship is nothing and can go to the trash with you...*khm* ANYWAY he knows me best knows me more than anybody outside my family. He knows that I can be goofy, arrogant or flirtatious if that's needed to make somebody happy, but he knows that too that I have a giant insecurity about my place and worth, but it seems he forgot it in the big scheme and be mean too, 'because if they are i can be too, right?'.

OK, i know i can be sometimes a little too much, but i can't help it, when i feel like gotten forgotten in the space ranger group they made i just jump in with my loud voice and jokes to make myself known and to feel I'm in too but you know, it's tiring. Trying to be friends with people who don't care enough to see you under the mask? Who call you insulting names and hurt you whenever you try to help them? The people you thought like a second family for more than a year and help them keep their shit together, keep their heads above the waves in the dangerous situations? Just you seven together, it can be too much and too little at the same time. There are times when it feels like i have a place here, but why is it that's always only when they need my help, need to make a joke of somebody, to get back up? And then when I need them they insult me and toss me away. 

Again...

And again...

Lance McClain is a proud person, he knows his worth (most of the time) and knows when someone wants to sink his boat and drown him and he will not let them, whoever they are.

If you want to come and see because from now on I will take things in my hands and live the life I need.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp, this is just a 0. chapter :D  
I just wanted you guys to understand what character i think he is :)


	2. High hopes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance tries and tries to be better for them. Of course he is.  
Because he will do anything to protect them. From the galra, from their demons.
> 
> He don't need them to thank him.
> 
> But it's too much for ask them to protect him from his demons too?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm here with the first real chapter and i'm just hoping that you guys will like it!  
I really wanted to post this and make something that you guys really can read ><
> 
> There's is not much action for the start but we will get there don't worry ^3^

A new morning.

Lance really want to say that this morning is special, but he will be lying

This morning is like all the mornings in the castleship for the last months, cold and silent, only the soft humms of the engines is audible. Lance opens his eyes to glance at the little digital numbers of the clock that Pidge made at the start of they life in the space, its says 07:06 the others are probably still in bed and Keith is in the training room, doing his morning exercise as always so that means Lance has twenty four minutes to wake up and go to the kitchen before Allura will yell off his head as usual.

Great, just great.

"Come on, a new morning a new day for wonders" murmuring this Lance gets out of the bed and goes in the little bathroom to shower and do his daily rutin, little aspects of life that keeps him stable. After that he just puts on the paladin armor to give him a little mental stability, keep him on his feet for the day.

After staring in the mirror for five minutes (when did he got this dead look in his eyes?) he just sighs and goes out of the room to make his way to the kitchen. In the silent hall he has enough time to work his frown to his signature smile, to be happy and cheerfully with his insides dying and after a deep breath he goes into the kitchen with an energetic "good morning!".

There's only Pidge, she looks like she didn't have yet her first cafe so its better to let her be by herself, and Hunk, who is making some breakfast out of the goo. He gets a greeting back from him, and only an inhuman grunt from Pidge.

"Hunk! Buddy, mi hermano what's this heavenly scent i smell here? Today is somebody's birthday?" Lance suddenly gasp loudly " It's my unbirthday?! How did you know?" He ask gleefully and sits down to the table next to Pidge.

Hunk chukles a little and shakes his head with a smile.

"No, its just a normal breakfast Lance" he looks to Lance and then turns back

"but its true that today is our unbirthday so its should be a feast!" Hunk says with high spirit while getting another bowl to the food and Lance give a happy laugh to that.

Before they can say more Allura's calm tone catch their attention.

"Good morning Paladins, it's good to see you in such high spirits. Can i ask for the cause of it?" she ask and sits down to her seat at the head of the table, next to her Shiro sits down to.

"It's nothin', just Lance being Lance in the morning, as always" Pidge says with an irritated tone gulps down all of her cafe, that Hunk puts before her, in one go.

After hearing that Lance just keeps his 'it's okay' smile because she's just half asleep, she didn't meant it, it doesn't matter that his stomach curl in a tight  
knot and feel like there are needles in his eyes. Lance needs to get it together, it was just a joke, right? Joke, like family, yeah that's it, they just mean to each other like siblings. As he lost in his head trying to loosen up and forget the painful words the others move to discuss today's training and he can catch only the last part of it.

Before he can ask for a quick briefing about what they agreed to, Keith and Coran finally arrives too and they move to lighter topics while they eat.

\---

"Why can't you do something so easy right?! If you want to pretend its just a game we can die! Everyone in the universe can die! Why are you so irresponsible?"

Lance gets up from the floor, from where he got tossed by the bot. It's not like he wants to hand his ass to them, he's just really bad with hand-to-hand and the others are not helpful when he tries to get better, they just make a joke out of it and forget him. So why does Allura need to yell off his head?

"I know Princess, i'm trying to get better it's just-" he's got cut off by Keith this time.

"Why are you always looking for excuses? It's not that hard and we already showed you how to do it properly at least a hundred times Lance! If you just finally stop to show off and do your job as the Blue Paladin there will be no problems!" Why is Keith yelling to? I know he is perfect at destroying things but Lance is not like him, why can't they see it?

"I'm doing the best as i can! I know you mullet-head are so perfect but we normal people need more time to learn things like that!" He retort back but Shiro comes between them with a disappointed look in his eyes.

"Lance stop, you need to calm down" he says instead of something helpful and leader-like move. And why is it that Lance needs to calm down, he's not even yelling.

"But he's the one wh-" Lance try to protect himself but Shiro cuts in again and his thoughts just screaming in head that why can't they just let him speak?!

"I think we should end the practice for today, we are exhausted and we need to calm down. Good job today everybody" he says dismissing everybody so why does it sounds like to Lance like Shiro only imply the first part to him? It must be his imagination, Shiro didn't meant anything with it.

\---

When everybody is gone and Lance sure that they will not come back, he pulls out his bayard and transforms it into his rifle. steadying himself and calling out to start the training sentence. He trains with it for two more hours and and with his sniper another one, standing in one place sometimes and at others sprinting from point to point to don't get caught by the drones. After that he walks away with heavy panting and sore muscles to bed, leaving behind perfect scores in the system, not bothered to save them because nobody will believe that he did that. After all, he can concentrate and work better without the team screaming at him for nonexistent reasons. He don't notice it but from the little over viewing balkon Coran comes down and looks trough his scores with a prude smile.

"Your scores are better and better my boy..." Coran mutters to himself and after saving the numbers in the system he leaves the training deck too. 

\---

For three days everything was good, they had a little rescue mission on a planet, its was Raucto. The natives looked like humanoid green rats, but they were cheerful and they had enjoyable personalities and they were really grateful for the help as they made a little feast for Voltron as thanks giving. Lance had a good time with them, someone to finally talk to without hurting words or disapproving looks, it really helped to raise his hearth and warm his chest. When all stomach was full and Allura made sure they joined the Alliance, Voltron needed to set up and flight off. 

After that Allura had let them be for the next morning til lunch, Lance was really thankful for that and after an early breakfast so he didn't needed to talk to anybody he went to the training deck to train alone a little more to get better and before lunch he was at the library, learning more altean. 

The lunch had nothing unusual too, green space goo and talks that passed above Lance's head. He was done and with a little smile feeding the Mice while waiting for the dismissal but instead Allura stood up from the table and looked them with a serious expression. 

"I didn't wanted to take away your appetite before lunch so i waited with the news but not a varga before the Blade contacted with me and they will come over" she looks at each of us " and they will be here in a thirty dobosh for briefing, they have a big mission and they need our help. Get ready and come to the control room." 

After that she simply walked out of the room with her usual royal self, how can she walk like she is in the air? It's like she is gliding and not walking, yeah, Lance always thought that, because look at her, people can't just walk like that right? Or is it some altean royalty ability? But that's not really important right now, Lance remind himself because while he was musing about that theory the others got up and left too. Great, left behind again, no biggie right? He just sighs tiredly and going too to get ready.

Not ten dobosh later he is in the control room,nice and tidy and the perfect image of a Paladin, but Lance stands in the corner, out of the attention and near the shadow but not too much so the others don't take a notice of it. From there Lance is comfortable, he sees and hears everything, but out of the others little bubble and without a suffocating felling. How did he changed this much? Back then he would stand proudly with them, feeling like the teammate he always wanted to be. He had so much hope when everything started, he thought that things will be different here, that Lance finally found the team he is a real part of...

When the Blade arrives, Shiro goes forward to great them and Lance steal a little glance at Allura's body language, yep, she's still not lost her disgust against them. After looking back Lance's eyes meet with Kolivan's and he give the galra a playful salute and smile as greetings, just like to the other Blade members. After all, he had taken the time and got to know them and bond with them a little, both for the sake of Voltron and for his own sanity. 

The briefing goes well, the mission has a big importance in the big scheme but Lance can't stop wondering if they really want to do this mission with all of them. A stealth mission needs a few member only so why do they want to Voltron go too? They're not really the stealthy giant robot Lions so he smiles to himself when Kolivan answers his silent question.

"And that's why we only going in with a team with a few member and you have the technology for the assault. That's why we ask only two of you to come with us."

Kolivan stops to speak after that and leaves them to choose who's going. Lance want to give ideas too, because it would be the best if a ranged and a close combatant accompany the Blade, he knows it but they arguing such a pitiful way that they totally forgot this option. He tried speak up to remind them and to stop the little word war between his teammates but Shiro silenced him with a fast reprimand before Lance can even end his first phrase, so he is silent again, gaze wandering to the other team in the room. They're silent and still of course, as always on a briefing but Lance can see that they are good, no injury and there is a light atmosphere between them. Good, Lance glad that they're doing fine.

"Okay, then Keith and I will go with them" Shiro speaks up and Lance takes a quick look at Hunk's face, he don't look so satisfied with it either. 

"But Shiro, i think it will be better to take a ranged with you for this mission. The Blade and you two are close range, it's better if you have someone to have your back if" Lance speaks up fast, immediately regretting it as something flashing in Shiro's eyes as he looks at him and Lance don't really want to know what was that.

"And i suppose that will be you?" he ask with a mocking tone " Coming with us to seek glory and then jeopardize the whole mission because you can't concentrate?" he ask and the words, that tone and that piercing eye cut deep, but Lance can't show it, not now, now he needs to make this trough, after all it's important, more important than defending his own shattered hearth. That's why with a slow and a little shaky breath Lance speaks up again.

"No, i didn't mean myself. Whats important is that you take a ranged with you, that could be Hunk. After all...it's better if you trust your teammate in a mission like this" he says bitterly, looking Shiro in the eye for a moment then looking away, away from everybody so he don't need to see the burning cold eyes. But with that, he don't see how Kolivan eyes narrow at the other side of the room.

"I agree with the Blue Paladin. We should take with us the Yellow Paladin" Kolivan says, stepping forward before Shiro or anybody can talk again and Lance feel his chest froze and heat up with that sentence in the same time. Happy that at least the Blade Leader willing to take his advice but feeling lonelier that he's choosing somebody else than Lance. But that's ok, the important thing is that the best soldiers goes to aid them and Lance can see too that he is not one of them. 

With a silent discussion and a final nod from Allura, Shiro looks back at the tall galran.

"Be that way then, we can depart in four varga if that's good for your team as well" he says and after Kolivan gives his affirmative Allura sends the Black and Yellow Paladin to get ready for the mission. After that Kolivan speaks up again, surprising Allura, who didn't thought that he has more to say.

"And there is another mission that we would like to ask the help of the Blue Paladin" he says with his usual solid face and tone, but when Lance looks at him, he sees a little glint of smile in his eyes. 

"And what mission would be that? I didn't heard about that beforehand." Allura ask with a little surprise in her voice and looks at Lance like he made a fatal mistake with just existing. Ouch-Lance can feel the love at there- just don't push yourself too much Princess -he thinks looking right back at her then shrug his shoulders a little saying that it's news for him too without words. 

"As you know, the Blade started to take bigger missions and making a name for themselves and letting the universe know that not all galra all evil. We have a mission that is exactly for this, but right now we have bigger problems with some details and i think the Blue Paladin's abilities are the best to help us out. " Kolivan says and looks Lance in the eye after that, who just can't help but gave him a smile. It would be great, he really want to help and he can finally feel like the Paladin he is again. Lance don't know what details Kolivan speaking of but he is ready to make anything for them to others see the Blade of Marmora are full of good giant purple batlike cats. 

"It would be go..." he starts to agree but Allura's disbelieving voice cut him off, again, whats with this again?! He wants to scream from the frustration but instead just travels his gaze at the Princess, sad to see how little (if not nothing) trust she has in him.

"And you want to bring of all the Paladins, Lance with you? I think it would be wiser and more efficient to take Pidge or Keith with you. "

She says with such a confidence, do she really thinks of Lance as an useless trash who is only here because he can fly a giant lion? Heck he don't even wanted Blue to take him to space to fight in a war that's not his, to be with people who hate him and hurt him. To see people die because he need to take that shot to save others. To get abandoned from the only one who he ad trust out there and then get burned with the Red Lion's fury and longing after Keith. He is not like Blue and Red, he is not a sentient machine programmed for war and perfect in every way. He almost broke from the lost of Blue and now he has finally a good time with Red just for the time he lose his bond with the others? If they think of him like that it would be better if he just go and leave them, it will certainly make everybody happier... With a growl and a piercing fire Red pulls him out of his spiral, she's the only one who still wants him, but what will happen when Shiro takes back Black and Keith comes for her? Lance can see that his place will be taken again, but this time he will not get another seat for the lost one...Shaking out of himself after another growl he can finally hear to what Kolivan says.

"....beliefs but i can make decisions what's best for my people and I just like the other members here can say without doubt that the Blue Paladin are the only perfect Paladin for this job and he will do an excellently, as always" he ends it with such a confidence that Lance can't help but suck a breath in from the raw trust the galran men just proved in him. How did he, the seventhwheel, little and weak Lance from Cuba earned this much trust from them?

But he can muse about it later too, right now, he needs to be a man and make his own decisions. With a serious face Lance steps forward, between the two team and without a glance at Allura he looks in Kolivan's eye and answers his trust with confidence and strength that Lance didn't knew that he still have in himself. 

"I will aid you with my best abilities"

Lance can see the satisfied curl of Kolivan's mouth and Lance feels his mouth curl up a little too.

"Thank you Paladin, depart in four varga" Kolivan says and Lance after his usual playful salute takes his leave from the control room almost running off with his excitement.

His spirit was not this high in a long time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you liked pleas leave a kudo or/and a comment. They can make my day brighter :)  
And of course they let me now if you liked it.
> 
> English is not my first or second language but i'm trying really hard for you guys to make the phrases clear and to spot the mistakes i do when i first write it down. And at the second time too. And after that when i think its ok, i read it again >< that's why i'm really hoping you don't lost your interest in it yet and will stay with me for the next too <3
> 
> See you soon <3


	3. Differences

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's a Planet in need.  
There's a plan in motion.  
There's a Blade of Marmora squad ready.
> 
> And there's a storm in the heart of a Paladin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so happy that i finally can upload this chapter!  
I just wanted to give you this but my luck went in the negative scale. But none of it! Now i'm here and what's better. The new chapter is here.
> 
> Enjoy <3

A small round room, the only light source is the holograph in its center. Not too long ago the were eight galran and a human in there, calm voices preparing for the mission, seven Blade of Marmora Member and Lance was there to listen to Kolivan and get everything in order, but now only Lance is in there with a stern expression on his face. They finished an hour ago, the meeting was fast and the seven others went to their ways to get ready. But Kolivan gave Lance a lot of information to think through before he can join them. Lance needed to get together his thoughts, he can't remember the last time he was alone like this, without Hunk or somebody else from Voltron for the 'safe numbers', more like to babysit Lance before he does something stupid, something "Lance-like". Too frustrated Lance snorts a little to get rid of these thoughts, it pains him how little trust the team has in him. He saw the look in the other's eyes before the Blade's ship departed and it punched him right back to the floor to try and get together his self-esteem again. He hears Kolivan's voice in his head again, turning back his mind to the mission ahead.

_ "We will strike at the public meeting that Commander Zhox will hold with the political leaders, the Empire had started to take over the powers from the shadows a quintant ago, and now they will step up to the stage and forcefully turn the leaders to the side of the Empire, declaring their control over the Planet. The operation will start with your shoot, you need to remove Zhox who's in control of the forces on the Planet. Your strike and Zhox's death will confuse the soldiers for a short time allowing our forces to strike. Your shoot is the signal of the start and the others on the surface will start phase two, eliminating the remaining galran soldiers and drones. That's why we need you to strike home for the first shoot and because the political leaders and civilians will be near the Commander, who will use them as his living shields if you alert him with your missed shoot." _

_ After looking away from Kolivan's serious expression Lance takes another look at the environment of the operation. It's a city, it looks like the planet,  _ Yeawei, _ is developed like the Earth before the 3WW but a little more alien-like and with much higher cranes. Giant skyscrapers everywhere, from the street one, can only see a bit part of the green sky. The buildings are so close to each other that Lance can only see the place where the galran general will be from one of the highest building's roof, 5000 meters away from Lance's sniper nest. It's a shock to him, Lance knows nobody on earth who did make a shot like this, like ever, but his bayard and the altean technology is more advanced than anything Earth can make so maybe it's not that much of a distance in space. Maybe he can do it, no, he  _ will _ do it. He's flying with a giant sentinel robot lion, a shoot like this is nothing, Lance tries to convince himself. He came with the Blade to help them and he will prove that he can be the Paladin everybody wants him to be. He will not run from a little challenge, he will climb this wall and will save the people of Yeawei. A satisfying roar from Red comes trough their bond, giving him a small smile. Red is not Blue, but she is one of a brilliant giant lion who's trusting him, he can't let his girl down, does he? With the confidence that Red had given him Lance looks up from the holopad.  _

_ "I will do it, you can count on me" he says with a strong fire in his eyes. With a satisfied gleam in his eyes, Kolivan nods, moving on to phase two. _

From then they went through all three parts of the mission, phase three is nothing big, ensuring the safety of the natives and making contact, all the juicy diplomacy stuff. After that they were dismissed, leaving Lance in his current state, looking at the details again and again and memorizing every little detail and visualizing. They have a really good plan and he's confident in the success of the mission if  _ he _ can do everything as needed. Lance trained a lot with his sniper and knows that he has the skills but the castle's training room doesn't have enough space to train for distances as wide as this, of course, Lance did longer shots perfectly at the heat of the battles when he needed to save his team from any harm that may reach them, but that distances were never more than 3124 m. How does he know this? It's not clear to Lance himself neither, with the vague clues Red did give him he thinks it has to do something to with the connection between the bayards and the Lions, like some automatic recorder that stores the data in the Lions. He tried to ask it from Pidge for a little more detail because he is sure that she has more knowledge about storing data but she kicked him out before he could speak a full sentence. 

A soft cough from the back brings Lance back to the present and the shoot he has to do but Kolivan's tall figure blocks the door before he can flee from the dark room to the hangars. Lance looks at Kolivan and the calm eyes of the Blade Leader tell him that he is not in trouble. 

"You have concerns Paladin" he says slowly and steps next to Lance quickly scanning through the holograph with his eyes "you have doubts in the plan?" he asks curiously looking back at Lance.

"No!...No, i think the plan is perfect" Lance shakes his head with a weak smile "I just wanted to clear some of my thoughts before the mission, and i have some questions..." he says worriedly and looks away for a second to steel himself, usually the team don't let him voice his questions on briefings or after them just in private, and that leads them to avoidable mistakes during missions that they would not do otherwise if they just look over the little things that rise Lance's fears. He tried so many times before but he only fund deaf ears and gotten insults and yelling back and with time he becomes tired of it and stopped to trying. But the Blade is not like Voltron, Kolivan is not like Allura or Shiro, or the others and he wants to do  _ everything _ perfectly in this mission so he needs to stand up and give voice to his thoughts. If he knows everything he needs to know then he can be better with that information and that's better for everybody ...  _ right?  _ Kolivan would not look down on him because of it, or so he hopes. 

"Ask them then and i tell you everything that i know to easy your concerns Paladin" Kolivan says in a calm tone as he turns to Lance, locking his blue eyes with a nearly piercing search that Lance curious about, what is he searching for? What does Kolivan see in him, does he judge Lance like everybody? Lance can't find his answers in Kolivan's eyes but he doesn't see anything mocking or scornful in his eyes and that gives him a little reassurance that he can ask freely. 

"This distance... is this common in space? I never have seen somebody shoot a distance like this back home and i know that out here you guys and the alteans too are so much more advanced than Earth but i never met marksman like me on the planets that Voltron saved. Not even a galran sniper on the battlefields and missions so i really can't say i know how good people are snipers... " Lance trails off awkwardly scratching the back of his neck as he looks down to the holograph waiting for Kolivan to speak, when Lance looks up again he can see that Kolivan is looking at the holograph too seemingly searching his words to speak. After a few ticks, Kolivan's eyes finally turn back to him and starts to talk with a little smile at the edges of his mouth but with an unreadable face.

"No, it is rather uncommon. Even the existence of sniper rifle users is rare for the known Universe and there are reasons for it. For one, the galra beliefs true power lies in the physical strength and honor face to face fighting, win and crush your opponent showing him your strength is the way of the galra. Of course, this philosophy became a little old in the deca-phoebs and now they use powers from despicable sources like Haggar and her druids...but they still despise the ones whose fight from the distance, hiding in the shadows without facing their enemy. Zarkon doesn't reward those who fight like that and the others are looking down them. That's the reason you can't meet a sniper in the Empire's army, the generals don't like to use them because they will look weak in the eyes of the Emperor. " Kolivan speaks with an unreadable expression that Lance can't define but before he can ask more about this Kolivan continues his line of thoughts.

"As for the other planets and star systems...there are free lands that have the technological needs to fight against the Empire but that usually goes into warships and plasma guns to fight off them outside of their planet. The ones under the Empire who has the technology are the manufacturing colonies but they don't produce them of the reasons i told you before. Another reason for the skilled snipers' absence is the warships. You saw it before but the fights are usually in the Planet's atmosphere or space, with warships and cruisers without the need or possibility for the ground forces to fight against them and this is also true for snipers, just simply the normal rifles don't have enough puncture and impact to harm them." Lance can see a sour expression on his face for a second but it's almost immediately gone behind Kolivan's mask "The Blade has some members who can and like to use rifles but no one is skilled enough to be called a marksman. But you Paladin are a marksman who has the skills and weapon to be true to your name, Voltron lucky to have a soldier like you with them, to be their eyes on the battlefield and to be the support who can create balance in your diverse team. " Kolivan ends his speech with a little nod like he truly thinks that. How can someone drop something like this on Lance so easily and sincerely? When was the last time he heard words like this spoken to him, Lance really can't remember, but Kolivan's words warm his chest and make him fidget with embarrassment.

"How did...why do you have this much trust in me just like this? How can you say something like this? Even my own team don't see me in a light like this if you ask them they will surely say that I can't do this shoot or that I have any contribution in the fights..." Lance looks away murmuring with a defeated expression. That's right, they don't even think he can be helpful to the Blade on this mission, without knowing what's it about. They never see the true potential of Lance or his true self, but it's not their fault. It's not their fault that Lance hid his feelings and his true self behind layers of masks and fake smiles. It was all Lance's choice that he continued to hide when they got out in that magical space castle with giant lions with only seven people. He tried to loosen up and himself to them but it was too late, he screwed up. They already have this image of him when he finally got the resolve to stand up but almost immediately got dumped to the floor. After that no matter how hard Lance tried to show them he is worth something and that he can fight alongside them they never see it, they only take notice of his mistakes and that's further strengthening their slack-off and happy-go-lucky image of him. So what did he do that a stranger thinks more of him than his space family? 

"We saw recordings of your fights from the galra data chips our spies got at the intelligence-gathering missions and don't forget that we went with Voltron to missions together at least a dozen times already. Thanks to you we had always easier times because we didn't have to watch our backs and we could concentrate on the enemy ahead with Voltron, you always kept us safe from the back. Don't think we didn't notice" Lance looks up from his dark thoughts as a big and warm hand grips his shoulder soothingly but Lance cannot maintain the eye contact and looks away embarrassed. They indeed accompanied them for a lot of missions recently but how did they took notice of it this fast but his  _ friend _ s still ignore him? Lance sighs defeated in his head and looks back at Kolivan choosing to ignore his storming mind and aching heart.

"Thank you, I'm happy that you guys can fight more easily with us..." Lance smiles softly at the Blade Leader and then takes on a serious expression "I think I just ask my last question then..." Lance says and at Kolivan's nod, he continues "Do you guys have a shooting range? I feel like a good practice will help me get in the mood. I know we only have a varga before we depart to Yeawei but I need it right now... if not shooting, even just some other training. Please, Koli" he looks up at Kolivan with his puppy eyes and trembling lips, this play always helped him get things from his sisters back home. 

"Of course, but our shooting range is not like yours at the castle, but feel free to use it as you like it. We never say no to someone so eager to train. This way." Kolivan smiles down at him and then starts to walk out of the room and down on the corridor towards the shooting range. Leaving his problems behind Lance quickly follows him. 

There are not many Blades at the room as Lance goes in, Kolivan left to attend his other duties. After adjusting the settings to his level at the control pad Lance falls easily to stance as the program starts. 

With his bayard in his hands and enemies on the field, he can finally be free from his thoughts. 

\---

Thirty-eight dobosh later Lance's hands are shaking so he grips his bayard stronger as he shoots the last training drone it's head. Putting away his rifle he tries to calm his uneven breath and goes to the wall to slide down and stretch his sore muscles. 

Kolivan did say that their shooting range is different than the one at the castle and yeah it was. It was  _ hard _ as quiznak. But it was really good, now he understands why is everybody in the Blade is a muscle-wall. Damn if he were to practice every time with their program he would be one too. Of course, what they have at the castle is good too, Coran is good at programing the programs and they are hard too, but the drones are too predictable, it's easy to predict their moves but their speed, strength, and number make the fights hard enough. 

But man, he feels so good now, like he can take out a full battle cruiser just by himself. He feels his blood pumping through his veins and his muscles are hurting just in the right way, he feels alive. Maybe this feeling is what gives the strength to Keith to lock himself in the training room all day. 

As Lance's thoughts wander he takes out a water pouch from the box that the Blades keep in the corner. It's so refreshing, did water always felt this good? Lance doesn't really care about it so he just keeps drinking and starts to organize his thoughts. It was a good practice, thanks to that he gained his confidence, he knows that he will make that shot worth. He is a Paladin of Voltron and he would do anything to save innocents like the citizens of Yeawei. Together with the Blade they will save them and the Universe will learn that not all galra are bad, some want the end of Zarkon's reign just like everybody else. 

\---

After getting refreshed a little Lance walks to the hangar to join the others. They have ten more dobosh and he can see that they are just at the end of the preparations. Most of them give him a nod as acknowledgment but don't stop at what they're doing. Lance walks to the familiar mask, this Blade went with them most of the times and Lance became friends with him almost immediately. Despite his appearance, he is easy to talk to and when something gets his attention he can become so talkative that Lance needs all his communicative powers to keep up with him.

"Regris! I didn't know you would come. You weren't at the briefing, but it's a nice surprise too know you are coming too" Lance greets smiling brightly at him, who in return looks up from his datapad and nods at Lance too like the others but with a playful tilt of his head so Lance knows that he's smiling behind the mask, it always feels good to be greeted with such enthusiasm and Regris is not one to be unaffected of the Blue Paladin's kind heart.

As Lance sees his friend's moves he thinks like Regris is looking at in his eyes, he doesn't understand why and tries to read the meaning of it, but he is not fast enough and Regris starts to move while clearing his unspoken question. 

"I was in charge of the information gathering for this mission but I just got back from an errand so Kolivan had taken over the briefing for me. And as the head of this operation, I started to organize the things here. You came just in the perfect time, we just finished everything we need to do before departure so after everybody is on board we are ready to go. It's good to see you decided to join us for this mission, I was not sure how Voltron would choose for Kolivan's proposal, but now we have one less thing to worry about that we have you and your skills with us." He looked around, the seven others went in the ship after finishing their work so Regris looked back at Lance giving a squeeze to his shoulder "We are ready to go and you Paladin?" He speaks to Lance so friendly that Lance can't help but feel lighter again, he missed a good-hearted interaction between friends. 

"Born ready," Lance says flashing his signature smile and walking in the ship to do what he meant to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why do i always write Balde of Marmora? I don't want them to be bald, i want them to be the Blade :D  
It's in a seriously irritating level (why brain, WHY???), so if you see one of these misspelling please tell me ><
> 
> If you like it leave a kudo and a comment, it's always warm my heart when i got one.  
Leave your thoughts, i'm curious thing who really want to know what you think! (And i'm always open to moderate criticism)
> 
> Thank you, see you at the next chapter <3


	4. A good day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's a Planet in need.  
There's a plan in motion.  
There's a Blade of Marmora squad on the streets. 
> 
> And there's hope in the Paladin's heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry that the chapters takes this long for me to update, somehow I'm never satisfied with them and I just write them again and again...
> 
> But here is the new one and I hope you will like it!  
Good reading!

Looking through the scope Lance takes in the situation on the square. He can see a lot of plump bodies of green aliens, they are shorter than the galrans with at least a head but they are triple as board and these green furry balls are now flowing to the streets from the buildings from everywhere. Lance can see on them that they are not built for fighting and from the look of Yeawei it seems they are an intellectual race with great sense of architecture and a greater longing for comfort. They built giant skyscrapers as long as he can see from up here, and with Yeawei's two yellow Sun it's really hot up on the roof, how are they don't melt with their fur? Lance is lying on the roof of the second highest building in within sight for two vargas already and now it's nearly the time for Zhox to come out to the podium and start his empty speech about an allience. From his sniper nest Lance can see everything in the area, including some of the Blades, perfectly blending in the crowd near the galran forces, ready to jump into action at Lance's signal. Lance can't help but be amazed how good they are at hiding their presence, if he didn't knew where to look he would never find them in the shadows. As he was inspecting the others his eye catch a glimpse of purple among the green and he instantly turns his attention to it. 

_There_._..!_ Finally Zhox came out from a building, heading to the podium with his smug smile that tells he doesn't expect any resistance today, thinking he had won. Good, it will be easier to attack and the Blade will break his plans in half. 

Locking on the Commander, Lance follows carefully as Zhox walks through the street and Lance starts to even his breathing, slowly preparing the shoot, ignoring the world outside of his scope.

_Breath out_

Zhox steps next to Yeawei's minister.

_Breath in_

The Commander takes in his surroundings and starts his long and boring speech about cooperation, independence and the Empire's good will. The usual lies from an oppressive reign, empty promises of a tyrant. 

_Breath out_

Without thinking about everything Lance pulls the trigger and after a tick Zhox falls down lifelessly to the ground with a hole in his head and in the next tick the galran sentries follows him all around the square, becoming junks as they got slashed in half. 

After observing the developing chaos and pulling the trigger three more times, preventing three galran to take hostages while the Blades were busy with the sentries, taking his eyes off from the scope, Lance stands up with shaky knees and takes some deep breaths to calm himself. Turning his bayard back to its original form Lance turns to Yktu, the Blade who accompanied him up here, with a questioning look.

"The death of Commander Zhox, Subcommander Pras, Lieutenant Vonteg and Uglox are confirmed. Phase two started without any casualties, nice work Paladin." Lance gives in return a winner smile to him, shaking off the tension of his shoulders a little.

"Cool, but we still have a lot of work to do, what do you say, are you up to some sentry hunting?" 

\---

Walking on the street Lance feels really drained. 

It's not like it was difficult to get rid off all the Galran on Yeawei but his team has only nine members and there were hundreds of sentries scattered around in little squads on the planet. Along the way Lance did see some of the natives fighting in groups with the sentries but fortunately nobody attacked the Blades. 

Even with the work of everybody Yeawei became free only in two quintant later, it's really nice to see how everybody's hard work paid off. And now looking at the group of galran friend at the end of the square, Lance can see the little signs of fatigue on everybody. Around them, there are some natives who seem scared of them, but the signs of the fight are on them too and unfortunately they didn't seem too hostile towards the little galran group. Finally reaching them, Lance takes off his helmet and greets them happily. 

"Hey guys! I finished the last lap in my area and it's clear from any galran, I suppose you're done too?" Lance ask smiling at the seven Blade, checking who's not there but with the masks on he can't tell for sure, some of them are really alike with the armor on. 

One of them steps to him and pats him in the back with a little too much force but Lance manage to stay on his feet and his smile is brighten as he listens to the Blade, thanks to her voice Lance can tell that she is Vocheev. This is the first time that they have met but she is the only female with them on this mission and she was really friendly to Lance on the way to Yeawei too.

"That's right Blue! You were almost last, what did it take so long? There is only Ryt out there, but he has the most far away area" she laughs like she just told a joke to him and then leads Lance to the others while talking " even Regris is here, but i tell you, he really likes to take his time so it's a real mystery how did you came after him" she stage whispers it and Lance can see that Regris' tail twitch from where he stands and Regris crosses his hands.

"That's enough, don't stuff his head with nonsense. " he says while his tail pushes her hand off of Lance's shoulder " Nice work Paladin, after Ryt arrive we can start phase three...but i think we will need your assistance for that, it looks like it will be not easy to get the natives trust, so we will need your rep..."

"Excuse me" completely gotten by surprise, all eight heads turns to the green alien who just walked to them. Seeing their reaction the denizen takes a step back alarmed and in an instant Lance steps forward with a welcoming smile and gesturing to them with a calming attitude. 

"Please, don't be afraid, sorry that we scared you, it was not our intention, you just caught us by surprise. What can we do for you?" Lance smiles up them, it's true that the denizens of Yeawei are smaller than the galrans but they are still taller than Lance. With their build and height they could be a really tough foe in a fight, but they choose to be peaceful instead so Lance is not afraid that they will break him half in any moment, yup, he has noting of that sort of feeling.

"Yes...I..._we_ are really confused. You're a Paladin of Voltron, right? Why...Why are you assisting the Galra? And...Why did your group fight with other galrans for these two quintant? Before all the commotion happend...the Leaders talked about merging in the Empire, but now that Galra who was on the stage dead...and...and this happened...Please Paladin, it means Voltron are here to help us?" They talk confused while their eyes are moving from Lance to the Blade behind him and back to Lance with a rapid speed. Before answering Lance gestures to Regris to come forward.

"Yes, i'm the Blue Paladin of Voltron, i'm honored to meet you" he smiles " These people behind me is the members of the Blade of Marmora, we came here to prevent the Galran Empire to enslave Yeawei. " Lance smiles at the green alien pushing Regris forward gently " He is Regris, he was the one who made possible to help you. The Blade is here only for one reason, to help your people." He stops speaking, giving the stage to Regris.

After that Lance was at the edge of their group, calmly watching how everybody started to loosen up a little and slowly the people of Yeawei accepted the Blade of Marmora. After that they didn't needed much time for start to celebrate and the little party grew a large festival.

\--- 

As the evening of the third quintant approaching Lance is sitting on one of the rooftops watching as the two yellow orb slowly disappears behind the landscape and the sky is turning from green to a deep blue, it's really beautiful and it gives a nostalgic feeling to Lance. Except of the colors, the two sun and the clearly alien architecture, it was a sigh he never thought will see again, after the first sun went down and only one is visible it's nearly identical to the sunset back home, it did warm Lance's hearth as he let himself to think a little about his family, what are they doing, do they watch the sunset on the beach or it's already night there? He wants to daydream a little more but the little festival's voices below him pulls him back to the present, everybody is celebrating the fact that they are free from the Galran Empire and they insisted the Blade to take part of the festival as the heroes of the day and to celebrate the new alliance with them. It was funny watching how awkwardly did the Blades take part of the party and they started to loosen up two vargas ago, it was a new experience for them that the folks wasn't afraid of them, instead they gather around them and try to dance with them. The people of Yeawei were really kind and cheerful after they formed the alliance between Yeawei and the Blade of Marmora. Lance was really glad to see how everything went smoothly.

Of course it was not like that at the start. When the fight ended and that one alien went to them they were still wary of the Blade but they still organized the political talks with the planet's leaders and the Blade went with them happily, of course with the masks on Lance could only tell this from their body languages. During that assembly the presence of one of the Paladins of Voltron greatly helped and Lance had a big role there too, when the natives doubted if they really can trust in the Blade's word, the turned to Lance to give his thoughts on the matter and after confirmation they went to the next points of the meeting. And this little circle did repeated frequently. 

After seeing that a Paladin of Voltron is supporting the Blade the bravest of the Leaders got the courage and went closer to them and started to open up to them, openly supporting the alliance with the Blade of Marmora. As the representative of the Blade, Regris told them why are they on Yeawei and that it was them who helped eliminating the Empire's forces to free the planet, that the Blade are on Yeawei as long as they want them and they are really offering to Yeawei a true alliance that's beneficial to both sides. All the reasoning of Regris and Lance as the living proof of the Blade's good will, convinced the inhabitants that they are really free to do what they want and the Blade's only reason to be on Yeawei is to help them keep that freedom and to stand up against the Empire. Looking back the first time Voltron did meet with the Blade of Marmora, Lance can happily say that they are grown big with time and making big effort to help the Universe and to help their own race get back their dignity. 

Lance was happy, dead tired but happy that . When the operation started he did his insane shoot (he has still a hard time to understand it was not a dream) and killed Commander Zhox with one bullet Lance was still a little dumbfounded as he and Yktu started phase two, eliminating all Galran remained on the ground. It was a very tiring couple of quintants, but a very successful too and Lance is really happy for the people of Yeawei and for the Blade. Not long ago he was down on the streets too and was chatting happily with everyone who went to him, happy to get to know these new people and happy to celebrate their freedom. Lately he didn't have much of these times, when Voltron did help some Planet and they went to the aliens to celebrate Lance always got scolded if he got too friendly with somebody in the eyes of Allura or Shiro. Other times Lance was banned to go with them because 'his irresponsible and outrageous actions would jeopardize their chance for an alliance', and no matter if Lance tried to oppose, he got shut down by Shiro or Keith and it really did hurt him so Lance stayed back in the Castle with Coran and the Lions and he spent these times helping Coran with his work or doing simulations in the training room, but it was still painful that not even Hunk didn't stand on his side in those arguments. 

And after his mind went down on these spiraling thoughts he needed a little air to get himself togheter again but now he can't help but wondering about the team while spacing out before this beautiful sunset.

What will they say when he gets back?

Will they be proud of him?

Will Hunk bake him garlic knots for celebrating his shoot?

Will Allura see what he is capable of?

And Shiro... will Shiro finally see him for what he truly is and not just as the kid who always annoys Keith? Will they finally see him as the right hand of Voltron he grew into to assist the Black Paladin and the team in their hardest times? Without knowing a little smile had appeared on Lance's face, maybe it's just in his head but when he get's back they will be happy for him, just like they're happy for each other's achievements, like he's happy for their success. Maybe when he gets back they will finally see eye to eye with Lance and everything will be how it should and Voltron will be stronger than ever, alongside with their little family. 

  
Lost in thoughts, Lance didn't noticed as behind him Regris climbed up silently to the roof and startled Lance as he sat beside him.

After seeing it's just Regris and putting away again his bayard, Lance looks at the galran with a question mark over his head. Seeing his human friend's expression Regris takes off his mask and smiles at Lance. 

"Nice work Paladin, we're thankful for your cooperation. It's a good day for the Blade of Marmora, we achieved a big victory, but i'm afraid that without you we would have not gotten to this point with these results. But it's only a victory of one battle and we still have to win the war, that's why we need to go back now to head toward our next battle, are you ready for depart? I'm sure Kolivan and Voltron are impatient to know of our victory"

Regris speaks with a calm tone and his usual measured words but his tail is flicking to the sides with excitement gives away his true feelings. Lance seeing it can't help but chuckle a little and he stands up, stretching out his back. After a good and refreshing pop and a satisfied groan he looks down at Regris, offering his hand to help the Blade up with a friendly smile. 

"Yeah, i feel refreshed and ready, our next goal is to make Kolivan smile!"

Lance laughed making Regris smile and the two of them started to climb down from te roof to collect the others and fly back to the base with a successful mission's report.

\---

Kolivan did not smiled, but he did gave them a satisfied aura after they finished the report. And everybody on the base had a little feast as dinner that day. And with the Blue Paladin among themselves, the dining hall was full of happines. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that was is! Did you liked? Please leave a comment and kudo <3  
I'm really wondering what you think so please don't hesitate :3
> 
> I try to update the next as soon as I can, but unfortunately my university started and I have way too little time to write :(
> 
> I still hope you will stick with me to the end, we have a long road ahead of us and I have big plans :D
> 
> Anyway, see ya guys later!


	5. Reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We are back at the castle. We have our reunion. 
> 
> There are conlifcts in the air.
> 
> Some things are getting sorted out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes i'm here! It's good to be back, sorry for the delay, I had a big work at my uni.
> 
> I hope you will enjoy this chapter too! Good reading :*

As the ship is getting nearer and nearer to the castle, Lance can feel his bond with the Red Lion stronger with every tick. He feels warmer as the little hole in his chest is filling again with the warmness of his Lion and as the always burning fire brings the happiness of his girl for his return. Proud of her Paladin. 

Of course, Lance is excited to finally be back, it was only a couple of quintants that he was away but he missed his family.

But he can't help to not be afraid, he really hopes that he is getting a warm welcome from everybody, after all, he truly loves them all. And now his mind doing what it always does, pulling to the surface the things that he did forgot (on purpose) and had them forcing back to the last room in his mind and lock them down for good. 

The most alarming one is the fact that nor Allura, nor Shiro did agree to send Lance to this mission and he just went ahead alone and decided this on his own.

The mission is a great success but it does not justify the fact that he threw the command line in the trash for this mission, and that was childish from him. He will get something for it, Lance was never more sure in anything in his life. 

Except maybe when he thought that he loves Jenny from the dance class. In the end, he was wrong so maybe he's never been sure for something before. That's a good sign. 

And now he is sidetracked. 'Let's take a look at the others' he stops his daydreaming and walks up to the two Blade. 

In the ship, that they are currently on, is only Lance and two Blade on board. Thanks to that Lance can freely agonize about his team in his mind, not attracting any attention because the other two is concentrating to get trough safety the asteroid ring. Why is the Castle of Lions are in the asteroid ring? Lance can only wonder their goal.

Red's reassuring purrs help calm down Lance but he can't enjoy the ride back as he thought he would. Not after his mind started to work against him. 

\---

(Hunk's POV) 

In the kitchen, Hunk is concentrating on his baking as he's listening to Allura and Shiro.

Shiro and Keith came back to the castle a day ago and when the two leaders are in one room they just start to talk about Lance. And they are not saying nice stuff. It makes Hunk sad how little they think of his best friend. 

Allura's complaining about the fact that Lance had broken the command chain. Shiro's complaining about the selfish and childish behaviour of the Blue Paladin. Pidge and Keith are not saying anything just sometimes chip in with a remark, not helping either! 

Hunk thought Pidge is wiser than this. 

And Hunk? He doesn't like it how they talk about Lance, but he can't stand up for him. He's really bad with confrontation, usually Lance the who do it, but for obvious reasons, he can't do it right now.

Still, how are they not see what Hunk can? 

Lance did nothing but be collected and supportive to them all.

Sometimes when Hunk can't sleep and goes to the kitchen for a midnight snack he finds Lance in the training deck, and his friend looks like he was there for a couple of hours already.

Other times, Lance is in the hangars, reading some altean books on the paw of the Red Lion. Reading out loud if he feels like it. Or just be with the Lions, bonding and playing for them with the alien guitar he found in the bazaar of Thaphioitar. One of the planets they save not long ago. 

This time Hunk could see that Lance went with the Blade of Marmora with resolve.

He could see it in Lance's eyes, burning strongly. The resolve to do what only Lance can do doesn't matter that he won't know what is it yet. Lance was ready to do whatever they ask from him. Ready to help innocence people, even if it cost him everything. 

It was four days ago, now Hunk is really worried. 

It takes too long.

Something went wrong and Lance is injured? Or worse, got captured by the Galra? Even worse, he's dead? Oh boy... Hunk can feel his stomach doing a flip at the thought. 

Whipping stronger the goo, Hunk tries to distract himself. It's not like he has no faith in Lance, Hunk knows he's very capable. But the team's negative attitude is pulling him down too.

With every tick, he gets more and more agitated. 

As blessing comes Coran's voice, announcing a friendly ship's arrival and with that Hunk drops the bowl and nearly runs out of the kitchen. 

Allura and Shiro went silent as they looked at Hunk's abandoned bowl. After a tick, they follow the Yellow Paladin up to the bridge. 

\---

After checking that the ship really is friendly the whole team went down to welcome the crew. Thanks to Coran it's sure, that it's a Blade of Marmora cruiser.

Hunk can only hope that Lance is coming too. Did Lance succeed at the mission and now they are coming back victorious. Or the Blade comes to tell them their friend's tragic end? Why didn't Lance contacted them yet, it would be a blessing for Hunk's paranoid mind. 

As Hunk starts tapping his feet on the floor from anxiety the ship is finally touched the hangar floor. 

Beside him stand Pidge, who is frustrated, if the elbow in his ribs is a sign for Hunk to stop. So he obediently complies and locks his eyes on the ship. Waiting for its door to open and show his friend. 

\---

( Lance's POV) 

The first thing Lance gets when the door opens is the excited purr from Red and the feeling of her flames hugging him. It gives the strength to Lance to walk down on the ramp and face the team.

The two Blade is silently coming with him as they walk down. Two calm shadow behind him. 

When he finally collects the strength to look up his eyes finds Hunk first.

Hunk looks nervous, but the little smile he gives to Lance is welcoming. That smile gives Lance a warm feeling, like his best friend is still his best friend, waiting for the time to come up and give Lance a tight hug.

Looking away from Hunk, the next person he sees is Pidge. She has her usual grumpy face and her tablet in hands, typing the same as always and absorbed in her work. That's a good sign. It means she is not angry at Lance or that she doesn't care. Either way is good. 

Next to Pidge is Keith. He as that emo look on his face and he stands with crossed arms. From his body language, Lance can tell that Keith is annoyed. That's nothing new, Lance can handle an annoyed Keith any time. 

So far everything's good. 

And he needed to speak too soon because the difficulty jumps harder with Shiro and Allura. He can tell from a glance that he's doomed. 

Shiro looks angry but relieved at the same time. It would be good but he stands the way he always does when there is a lecture coming.

Allura looks just genuinely pissed. She looks like she will lose it any second now. If you ask Lance, he would bet his money on Allura's exploding the first chance she gets. That's something he needs to avoid giving her. 

Steeling himself with deep breaths Lance stops before his team. 

"Hi guys, did you missed everybody's favourite sharpshooter?" he asks them jokingly with his best smile on his face, hiding the nervousness behind his mask. In times it really hard to play the confident Lance so excuse him the shaking of his hands behind him. 

Lance did miss them, he was away for four quintant and now he needs his hugs from his family. He needs to feel he's welcomed. He needs something to believe he has his place here. 

Bless Hunk and his honey-like personality. As their eyes meet once again he finds himself in a tight welcome hug in the arms of his best friend. 

"Careful big guy, you're working with a delicate stuff" Lance laughs and hugs his best friend back the best he can, squeezing back lovingly. 

After Hunk sets him free Lance gets a grunt from Pidge that he deciphers as 'welcome back idiot'. He can't help but be relieved with the friendly grunt from her.

His smile grows wider as a warm hand squeezes his shoulder and his eyes meet with Coran's.

"Welcome back Number three, I assume your mission was a success, it's good to have you back lad" Lance nods at the altean's words.

"Yes it was, it's good to see you too Coran" he smiles warmly up at the advisor then turns to the Princess with a serious expression.

"I can give you my report Princess or would you like to hear it from the Blade?" Lance asked, standing a little straighter and changing in 'paladin mode'.

The altean princess looks a little conflicted after seeing their little reunion and the cold way she gets after it, but after a tick, she has her piercing eyes back. 

"I would like to hear both sides. Let us go to the bridge and after you, we can listen to the Blade's report too," she says and then turns away, walking out the door. 

Keith and Pidge follows her without a word. Hunk and Coran give their greetings to the two galra beside Lance and then they are gone too. The two Blade starts to walk to the bridge too but Lance is stopped in his step by Shiro. A strong hand on his shoulder keeping him from fleeing. 

"I'm glad that you're back safe and sound Lance" Shiro smiles gently but Lance can't loosen up. He can feel there is more that his leader wants to say.

And true to his anticipation Shiro continues to speak "but you can't just break order and fly off with the Blade of Marmora. You ignored Allura and went ahead without any reason. That's not how a team works Lance. It was irresponsible." Shiro says disapprovingly but Lance shakes his head and takes a step away from his leader, shaking off his hand. 

"It was not without reason Shiro. The Blade told us they need my skills for the mission, of course, I agreed to go. They needed my help."

"That's not the point. If I'm absent, Allura has the last word in missions and you ignored this fact. You went ahead and acted on impulse without looking around and listening to your superior. What would happen if Voltron needs you while you were away? Or if you got injured alone, without your team?" as if Shiro did not hear Lance's words he just speaks without hiding his thoughts. Listening to him Lance can feel how his patience is wearing thin. 

"I'm the right hand of Voltron. If there are lives on the line I will take the opportunity to save them. I know the weight of my post but when there is a need for a Paladin, for help I can't say no. Allura is the princess, yes, but I'm my own person Shiro, I knew what I went into. I know what I'm doing, can't you trust in my abilities too? If you can't do that, at least look at the results and think." Lance looks at him with a serious expression, he's too tired to take Shiro's abusing and tries to stand up for himself. 

"Enough, for now, we need to go to the bridge and you need to cool down, but we are not done yet. And as a result of your actions, you will help Coran with his work for a week." Shiro says then turns away, walking out the hangar and leaving Lance alone. He groans when the door is closed back. 

"Let's talk about prejudice instead... Nice start with letting them hear your voice, Lance..." he sighs defeated.

Red sends her thoughts of the matter and an encouraging roar from her hangar and Lance chuckles. 

"You're right, but it's not nice to say that of Shiro" the smile on his lips is genuine as he starts to walk out "I need to go before I anger Allura even more. I drop by you after the reports Beautiful".

He leaves the hangar with quick steps, repeating his report on his way to the bridge. 

\---

Lance thinks of himself as a tolerant man. He thinks a big family and the hardships in his life gave him a big tolerance against bs. 

But at the end of the meeting, he just wanted to tell off Allura. Maybe knocking some reason in her head too. 

She was just so distrustful. And hurtful. 

Lance knew before that the princess was distrustful towards his abilities. But now he feels that the princess thinks of him as nothing.

That two poor Blade told her every little detail but she was still dissatisfied and asked for more and more.

Lance won't lie, it hurt that she questioned this much his ability to do his work as a Paladin. It hurts that she won't have the slightest faith in him. 

The others didn't talk much but when they heard of Lance's shoots there was a little reaction.

The first was Pidge, telling that it's impossible. She seemed interested so Lance thinks she said it in a good way. Hunk gave him a little pat on the back and Coran looked really proud as he smiled at him.

It warmed Lance's heart.

The other three's reaction was not good. And the looks that they gave each other was painful.

On the bright side, they just jumped the theme and went for the next question. Completely ignoring it. 

And when Allura was finally satisfied she let them go. Taking this opportunity Lance fleed room before Shiro or Allura could catch him. 

He was tired so he went straight to his room and after a shower, he went to the Red Lion's hangar.

His Lion sat there in all her majestic glory and her eyes lit up at Lance's arrival.

The thought that he is the Paladin of such a fantastic creature made Lance smile. When he was close enough she lowered her head and let him in. 

Sitting comfortably in the pilot's chair Lance sighed. The feeling of Red's consciousness hugging him like a blanket warms Lance's soul and he can finally relax. 

After sharing the last quintants stories they both went silent. Relishing that they are together again.

Lance almost drifted off to sleep in the quiet peace but after some time Red raised a question that instantly woke up him.

_~What do you want to do from now on?~_

It was something Lance didn't want to think. Not after the Blade. Not after the feeling of how a true team works. Feeling how others treated each other, how they cared for each other. Feeling how great it feels when somebody has their trust in him. When somebody got your back. 

It shook his word. It broke the picture of his space family and the picture of his role in it.

And now Lance was not sure of his future. 

His family taught him to always love himself, to never let others pull him down.

But now? Every day he feels like he's drowning.

Like he's s chained down and can't break free, slowly losing against the weight of the chains. 

Back home he would leave a group like this to find friends that really cared about him. He would run away and start over.

But he is now here. In space. In a quiznaking space castle, locked together with a group of people without the means of escape.

And he has a duty. He is a Paladin of Voltron, defender of the universe. He can't abandon his duty just because he's unhappy. He can't run. 

He's the right hand of Voltron, all he needs to do is to step past his selfishness. He needs to let go of his weak self. 

_~What do you want to do?~_

Red's question feels like a slap to his face. She tries to help him, but this question is something Lance avoided for a long time now. Because it brings ideas that he can't have if he wants to be stronger. 

"I want to _run_... I want to go away but I want to be with them too. I want to let them in and I want to lock them out, I want to show them who I am and I want to hide away from them. I want to be better for Voltron but I don't want to kill my true self. I want to change but I want to Me. 

I'm a coward Red, I want to run but I'm afraid of it. I'm a Paladin and I need to stand up against injustice. I want to run so much that it haunts me but if I do that the universe loses Voltron and there will be nothing to stop the Galra from killing innocents. I'm a coward and a weakling whose only good point is to be a Paladin of Voltron and I'm bad at it too! “

Lance can't help but shout as he finishes to speak. His eyes are burning and the tears are pouring from them.

He hugs himself to stop his shaking but it's in vain as he slips off from the chair to the floor.

Red tries to calm him but there is no help. Lance just can't stop the tears that were locked away for a long time now. 

\---

Sometime in the castle's night circle Lance finally stops crying. After that he just sits there, lost in thoughts, blindly looking before him. He needs to decide the future now. 

At the morning he needs to sit down with the others for breakfast and he needs to be himself. Or the himself they think he is. 

He needs to face the others and joke as always. 

Lance stands up and rubs his face then gently pats Red's control panel, letting out a shaky breath. 

"I'm sorry Beautiful that you have to see this. But I made my decision" he says with a determined shining in his eyes "I'm a Paladin of Voltron, that's why I need to face my fears. I try to make Voltron stronger, I give the others a chance to change. Let's see how things work out, after that I choose my next step" he smiles as Red hums to him approvingly.

As he goes back to his room he feels lighter. Lance trusted once in his space family. He knows it's in them to grow stronger together. They can build trust again together, they can work together to make things better. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think it really important that silence can hurt others too. If they are hurting and they are alone it's really hard to win. You need to speak with others, friends, family or someone. Sometimes even a stranger can be a good listener for your fears and problems. 
> 
> You need to be open with others and talk to each other if you have hardship because a misunderstanding or the absence of words can be more hurtful than the truth. So don't be afraid if you have something that weights your mind. 
> 
> That's it! If you liked it please leave a kudo and share your thoughts with me!


	6. ...Yours always

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I love Lance too much to hurt him. But i'm trying.
> 
> And there are people who don't hesitate to hurt him.  
Will Lance take it? Or would he not? Can we hit them in the face?  
No? OK, we will be peaceful...for now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Here is the new chapter, we move forward in the story with looking back :D But we really move forward too :D  
Good reading ^3^

Everything was not okay. 

He was patient enough, but even Lance can't take everything, won't take everything.

There was a lot of things he tried, but every one of them was is vain. No matter what he did, it was just never good enough. 

Lance really tried to fix the team's problems for these past three phoebs. He tried to fix the team's dynamics and open up to the others, but he alone is not enough.

He needs them to meet with him halfway, he needs them to take some effort too. No matter what Lance tried he met with a wall, be it Allura, Shiro ...or literally a wall. That one was really irritating, that day could not end in a more humiliating way, it was his luck that nobody did see him running in the wall blindly... but lets stop here, just the memory of that day brings heat to Lance's face.

Do someone want to know why is he is right now in a dark corridor somewhere deep inside the castle. Hitting the wall and leaving bloody marks on it, without the slightest care about his hands. No? Of course not, he could not do this if somebody would care. But he needs to do this, after all, he can't hit Shiro or the others instead. That would be a really wrong move from him and no matter what, Lance isn't somebody who would hurt his friends...or not-friends. 

As he don't have anything else to do, he could go back and review the past phoebs for the next generation. He can leave his memo here in the castle for someone to find it. It will be surely better than the self-destruction. 

With a tired sigh he stops moving and slides down to the floor with his bleeding hands between his legs. After some calming breaths he takes out his personal device - they each have one thanks to Pidge - and starts the recorder.

Watching the blue sphere glowing in the middle for a tick he sighs again and starts to speak.

"Hello stranger, it's Lance McClain. Blue Paladin and Right hand of Voltron..."

When was the last time his voice sounded so blank, so done... so _dead_? If his voice is like this, how is his looks? His eyes must be dead too and he knows he has dark circles because he can't sleep more than a few vargas.

"Maybe no one will ever hear this log, but i just want to be hopeful and think this will be not lost forever. So i just want to tell my reasons for doing this. I just need a little time before the others going to sleep and i thought i could do my first and last log as a Paladin. You see, i had a resolve three phoebs ago to change things. I started it in the morning after i came back from my first mission with the Blade of Marmora..." 

\---

In the morning Lance went to eat with everybody like always. Nowhere a hint that he broke down in the Red Lion's cockpit. He smiled and told jokes to the others to lift their mood before a long and hard day. 

He was careful. He was the same as always but he did slow down his pace and tried to speak with the others normally. When Pidge and Hunk started talking about some high-tech stuff, he was lost. No problem, he can talk to the others. He tried to join in the conversation but he was shut down so he just finished his breakfast silently. 

All movement was like this. He tried but he met with closed doors. Luckily they didn't have any mission so there was only training for the team. 

Lance was collected, he focused and did everything he needed to, perfectly and without a sound. He even let go of his pointless mocking with Keith. But after each training, when they did something wrong, Lance had the scolding. It didn't mattered to Allura and Shiro that he did things perfectly, he was the one to bear the blame. 

\---

There wasn't any change even after a phoeb. 

Lance was quieter, he didn't told any unnecessary joke. He did fine in every training. He worked harder than ever but no matter what he did or who he spoke to, it didn't bring change. 

The Blade came again and asked for his assistance. After a long insisting from the Blade and an even longer persuading from Lance, he got the permission to go. The mission was a success and Lance had a good time with the Blade, he spent some time with them before he went back to the castle. Red was proud of him and Coran gave him a strong hug when he got back.

\---

After two phoebs he was a tired of the team behavior and started a new policy. He left them some space and started his lone days. He was in the library most of the times or he hung out with Red in the hangar. At night he was training, that was the time when he started to get problems with his sleep.

It was a day like the others, sitting in the silent library, all around him books and documents. Everything was the same, except him. He fund a chronicle of the past Paladins. He was reading that chronicle for the past two quintant, it has everything in it. Each and every Paladin and their story, Lance loved reading it but after some time he fund out something he could never guess. 

There were Paladins who left Voltron. Almost everybody died or got too old to be a Paladin, but a few left. And almost all of them were Blue Paladins, there was 3 Red and a Yellow too, but the others all Blue. It shocked Lance. He never thought a Paladin could resign.

After he finished reading, he put everything back to its place and went to do his work. But he could not shake off idea of leaving. 

\---

Lance did his work as Paladin properly for the next movements. He went another mission with the Blade of Marmora and helped Coran around the castle. When he was alone with the altean advisor he often asked him to tell the tales of specific Paladins. 

Red knew what he was thinking and was strongly against it. She became more motherly and protective to Lance. Thanks to her and Coran the idea of leaving was a dream, a 'what if' thinking in the lonely times during day and night. 

Until the battle in the Sionubell system.

It was a really difficult battle. The galra had a strong force there and a lot of prisoners that they needed to save. The plan was not bad, but Lance saw errors in it. He tried to voice them but the team shut him down and they started the operation. Lance had his stomach in a knot as they went in and he tried to defend every weak point they had. Thanks to some miracle he managed to do his part and fill in too in the first part. 

As time went on and the tension grew, everybody became more sharper. He tried to calm them and guide Keith forward in the plan, keeping everything together. 

The prisoners were almost all safe but there were still too many galra cruiser against them. Pidge worked with Hunk, Allura with Keith and Lance watched after them, keeping them safe when the galra attacked from a blind spot. Unfortunately Lance didn't have his back protected by them and he got a surprise attack from the back and got surrounded. He was alone against them, he lost the sight of the others and the castle. No matter how hard he tried, he got hit after hit.

"Guys! I need help, i'm surrounded and i can't..." he tried desperately ask for help.

"Lance! Do your job! We have our hand full, we can't always clean up after your slip up!" Pidge yelled at him and Keith barked him down too. After that he didn't tired to get help, but it was a lost battle, he tried to win against them but no matter how many he shoot down, there was always more. A strong blast knocked Red into another ship and Lance was sent flying in the cockpit. He felt a sharp pain in his left hand and in his side but he climbed back in his seat. He was dizzy and his vision went black and blurred as he tried to break free from the enemy. 

He could hear his comm buzzing as the team tried to contact him but when he spoke they didn't heard him. His comm off, great. He finally broke free when he heard the others.

"Lance! Where are you?! Why can't you answ...wwzzz"

"it's not time for su..zzz..king, answer already you idi..zz.zztt"

"How can he be so c..z..z..sh?!! "

"He is so irresponsible! Why can't he do some....zggzzz.... ously?!"

Lance could not hear everything but the words were harsh and full of venom as the team insulted him. Lance could not answer them and he could feel his consciousness slipping. As the team screamed at him and insulted him in the background he could feel as Red started to take control. She sent him a calming purr and Lance obediently let her do what she need. He stopped fighting against the dark and lost his consciousness as Red flew back to the castle.

He could not see but the others got in too, and the castle jumped to a safe place to take care of the prisoners.

\---

Lance woke up for the soft nudges of Red in his mind and the screaming pain in his head and hand. According to Red, he slept for two vargas and nobody had come to look for him, she started to worry so she woke him up.

He was thankful for it he needed to go to a healing pod. He stood up, his legs barely supporting him as he bid goodbye to Red and went to heal himself before he bleed out in Red. 

On his way he didn't met anybody, not even Coran, but it's not too much of a problem. Thanks to his work with Coran, Lance knows the med bay and he can start the healing pods to. He takes off his armor, wincing as the pain stab in his side and arm. When he's free, he steps in and starts the program. Slowly he can feel as the pod working and he let the sleep take over.

\---

Somewhere in the night the pod opens with a hiss and Lance takes two steps before he drops to the floor. He's cold and tired but thankfully nothings hurt. Slowly Lance collects his armor and goes to his room. 

His tired mind is like a recorder, playing again and again his friend's words from the battle and from the past. Not even sleep brings him peace, the nightmares that he has for a phoeb now stronger than ever.

The next quintants are a blur. They helped the prisoners go home and they repaired the castle and the lions. Lance got some insult from the others here and there but his mind was far away, planning his future. He spoke to Regris at night to say goodbye but Regris insisted that Lance visit the Blade before he go. So Lance made the first stop in his travel the Blade of Marmora. He was glad that someone at least wanted to see him. 

\---

"And today...we have a training" Lance sighs as he looks at the numbers, he spoke for a long time without noticing "It was the usual, but one of Keith's remark made me really angry...so i messed up my hands without thinking... I think i punched out all the stress i had...no i just feel empty... This is my tale...sorry if it got boring, i got carried away... I will going now. I don't know where will i end up but i will spread Beyonce to everybody" he laughs halfheartedly " yours always, Lance McClain." He finishes the log with his laugh, but it feels wrong to his ears. Lance puts down the device and stands up, the blood on his hands are dried but he can see that it's nothing serious. 

He walks down in the silent corridors to his room and takes his bag. There's nothing much in it, just some of his clothes and personal items. Next is the armory, he needs some weapons and a suit, he can't use the paladin armor, it's not his anymore. He's not prepared for the sight in the armory.

Standing in the middle, putting a rifle on the table is Coran. When Lance steps in the old altean turns to him with a sad smile.

"I see you came my boy" Lance can only nod as he walks to him " I can't say i'm happy that i was right...but i understand that you need to do this..."

"Coran, how? I...I mean, i never mentioned that i will go..."

"Nothing in the castle can slip by me. I saw how the paladins were treating you, i tried to help but there is only this much an old man like me can do" he sighs "The Paladins need someone who can comfort and support the others. But they themselves need the support of all their teammates, to ground them and keep them stable. This is a really fragile balance, without the reciprocated support these Paladins tend to crumble. I hate seeing it happen, especially to you my boy. You all were so close and i saw how hard you were working, i hoped things will turn for better. But this team doesn't notice their mistakes and they haven't listened to my hints about it..." he grasp Lance's shoulder " It saddens me to lose another son but it is time for you to leave and say goodbye to being a paladin."

Lance can see the sadness in his eyes and with tears in his own he hugs Coran tightly. He can't say a word, but he don't need to. Lance knows that all his feelings are in the hug, and Coran can feel it too. When they finally pull away, the altean wipes away his own tears.

"I prepared the necessary things for your journey" Coran takes a step back to show him everything on the table. 

Lance can see a sniper, it looks like his bayard's sniper form but this one is black with some blue adornment and with attachable parts. Next to it is a rifle, same design but this one is thinner and a little longer than his bayard, but it fits nicely in his hands. The third and fourth items are two pistol, both black. One has a blue lion head and the other has a read lion head painted on it. Lance can feel his tears coming as he takes in the last one, a sword, it's longer than is bayard and thinner but as Lance picks it up he can feel how balanced it is.

  
"Coran...these are perfect. How did you do it all? Thank you" Lance smiles at the ginger man who smiles back with a loving smile.

"I wanted you to have everything you could have, space is wide and you don't know what might happen. But there is this last one, this will give you the most protection" he smiles and takes out a suit. As Lance put it on he could feel how comfortable it was and it has a hood. He can move freely in it and it was more slim than the paladin armor but as sturdy. It has a different material for the boots and gloves, and they reach to the elbows and knees. It's mostly black, but have some red and blue lines for decoration. The helmet is rounded, the red and blue lines running up and to the back. With pushing a button the visor disappears and Lance smiles at the altean once more.

"Thank you Coran, i hope we will see each other sometime. Take care of yourself..." he smiles and hugs him once more. After a little he pulls away "I need to go, i promised Regris that i go and see him before i take off. Thank you, for everything" he smiles and Coran gives him a little device.

"It's my own work, i have the other half. You can write with it to me. Be safe my boy. " after a final smile Lance turns away and with his his new gear he goes to the hangars. 

He packs everything in the ship and sends his goodbye to Red. She's not happy, but understands Lance's reasons. However when they talked about what to do, she choose not to cut their ties. Whenever they are close to each other, they can share their minds again and speak to each other. It warmed Lance and he happily agreed, that's the reason, that he feels that it's not their final goodbye. 

_~Take care Cub, may the stars lead you and we will meet again. Never let your flame die down.~_

"Yes, we will see each other again, take care of yourself beautiful." Lance smiles and flies away to start his new journey. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope it was to your liking! I'm not sure in this one, i didn't have enough time to work trough 4 times like always, so this was a first time write thing. So please, if you find something do tell me and i correct it <3  
Sorry that i don't have schedule ><
> 
> If you liked please leave a kudo, comment. It really lifts my spirit!  
Thank you! See you next time.


	7. Sounds like a plan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance's first fight after he left Voltron. 
> 
> And it's against a panel who wants to hide its treasures from him, but fortunately Regris is in time to stop him before things can become bloody.
> 
> There is a not-so-fairy tale and some aliens with great ideas.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yohooo. Somehow this chapter just jumped out and I didn't needed to fight with it to not be shy.
> 
> I'm so happy that you guys enjoy it and I enjoy writing it for you!  
With this chapter we reached the first milestone that I planned.  
I'm so excited! I hope you will like what I planned!  
Good reading<3

It took a varga and thirteen dobosh for Lance to get to the meeting point that Regris sent. It felt much more. He could not stop his brain's marathon but the thinking did not made time faster, it made slower! And in an empty spaceship deep in space and alone, Lance did not felt good. 

Lance was anxious, restless and so _empty_. He wanted to cry, he wanted to laugh. He wanted to punch himself for doing it and he wanted to praise himself for finally doing it. He he chose to laugh as a nervous chuckle comes out of him. 

He finally did it. He cut his ties with Voltron, he became free. He can do what he want now.

And what does he want? 

It was something he thought of in almost every varga for the last three phoebs. He want to go home so badly but he can't, at least not now. Not when there are hundreds of innocent aliens who are suffering because of the Galra.

He want to help so he stays, it wasn't an easy decision. He did not left Voltron to run away. No, he left to be free from his chains and now that he did it he can help the people in his own ways. He want to help so the war could end sooner, and more innocent people can go home to their families. Yes, he may not be a Paladin anymore, but he's still Lance McClain and he has the power to help.

Maybe he could join the resistance or be solo and be some awesome space ninja. Or space mercenary. And he will need to change his ship as soon as possible, it would be awfully suspicuous if he stick with this altean ship, everybody knows that only Voltron has altean tech. He needs to stay low so he can move freely and work best. 

But he can set his half baked plan in motion after he saw Regris. Now he finally reached his destination...and it's an empty corner in space. As far as he can see there is nothing.

Maybe he got the wrong numbers, he typed something wrong? No, he checked it, twice. He is in the right place. So he just needs to wait for his friend, it could be worse. A peaceful corner always better to wait and here he can be sure to notice if something is coming his way. 

Lance stands up from his seat and walks down from the cockpit. The ship he got is not too big, perfect for one person to manage all the work and for one person there is enough space (as if Lance did not have enough already). He left his bag and new weapons at the entrance when he departed and now he wants to do a look over on his food, water, medicine and other stuffs. Thanks to Coran he has holsters and straps for his new toys and now that he calmed down a little and has some time, he can put them on. His two pistols goes to his thighs, red one to his right and blue is to his left. He had practiced a little with dual pistols at the castle, but he needs to train more with them now that he has these two lady.

He puts his sword and rifle on his back, always felt more comfortable this way and he can move with more freedom this way. The sniper is in his sheath and it has a strap if he needs to take it with him for a mission, but for now he just puts in near his seat as he is not need it right now. 

Lance picked up food for a phoeb and water for two movements. In time he needs to find more or figure out a way to produce his own but he is good for now. There should be some magic alien thingy in this ship that recycles water, he knows somewhere he read about it before, he just needs to find it. He can hunt for his food on planets so that's not a concern for now.

Next his medicine and first aid collection. He have a little and got a little more from Coran. It's not much but enough for now, he could be injured lightly for three or four times before he runs out of it. There is no more healing pod for him so Lance needs to be more careful from now on. He has his doubts, but it's not like he _wants_ to be injured, and now there is no team he need to push away from a laser. _And_ Lance can be stealthy too, if he wants to and there is no one to make him agitated and angry in the most crucial times. So Lance is pretty confident that he does not get shot on the first tick he's on mission. 

And lastly, his own bag with his things he deemed to be to important to leave behind.

His clothes, and his jacket. He would never leave behind his jacket, it's one of the few things he has from home. It's a little worn out and he needed to sew it a couple of times but Lance can still smell home in it. He has the altean sleepwear that Coran gave him at the start of their little adventure as well as his blue lion slippers. He got really fond of them. 

He has his beauty products, it was really hard to fish these products out among all the alien version, if he was not careful enough he would have burned off his face at the start. Another point for languages, it can save your beauty.

But back to the point. Lance packed some of his little things he got from planets they saved. He has one of the world's most weirdest doll from a little girl he saved from a bomb. It's as big as his palm, in the color of toxic green and it has three eyes and a ponytail AND it has _four_ arms. The people who lived there reached only to his knee, and were fluffy with red to brown fur. And they have four eyes, yeah, but it's still not three and where did they got the image for that doll?

Well, nevermind, it was weird but it was the cutest thing Lance had seen in space and he would fight anybody who dare to say otherwise.

Next in line was a necklace with a ring on it. The ring was from a metal only found on planet Xyries and it was the symbol of a great friend. Lance got it when they departed, he was so surprised he could not say a proper thank you before took off for their next mission.

The third item was a gem, not bigger than a golf ball and it was cut in magna form. It was blue, like the sky on a beautiful summer day but when the light shined at it from a specific direction, the gem became dark blue, like the night sky. Lance loved this gem to just watch, turning it this way and that way, mesmerized by its colors. All the Paladin's got one in their respective colors from a freed miner race but it never troubled him. Until now, it was on his desk in his room, where he always saw it from the corner of his eyes, always in reach when he could not sleep and he didn't wanted to think. 

And the last one is his favorite. He got it from a race, called gragad. They have a planet full of rainforest as a home and the people are the most beautiful race Lance ever saw. They were nine feet to thirteen feet tall, all long limbs but strong and gentle aura, and despite their high, their were like the elves from tales. They all moved elegantly and they looked like they were one with the forest. The gragad has two crystal like eyes, in green, blue and a darker brown. The clothes their have was only a silk on the waist and the female ones were in toge like dresses, always just enough to not call it out. All of them has long hairs, green or brown, the same color as their skin and each hair style told one's rank. They were so modest and gentle, Lance loved the movement they were with them. 

All in all, they were beautiful and Lance was fascinated by them. After the fight he talked with them, learned about them and their language. Everybody was calm and kind, but fierce and sharp in need. Lance made them laugh some and spoke of the forests of Earth a little, Earth's rain forests were similar, but in a smaller scale, the gragad was curious about it and Lance was happy to share. 

When Voltron helped them heal their injuries and establish stability Lance needed to say goodbye to them. He gave them a photo he had from home, he made it when the McClains were camping in summer, he has his family on it in the forest, smiling and playing in the forest. And Lance received a small plant in return. It looked like an azalea, but it was dark blue with light green, almost white flowers.

The flower's name is Aelnaet and it's a common flower for the gragad. They love this flower for its scent and the meaning it has. _Friend, family, home and life_.

It's a perfect plant for Lance who's crave for them in all his life. 

He finished the check up and started to familiarize himself with his new ship for the time being. He needs to find the altean devices that can keep him alive.

Lance finally found the panel that hides the treasures but he can't find the way to open it and he starts to get angry. _Why is there no open button on this quiznaking panel?! _

Lance is ready to break down the unyielding door for his survival when he finally hears a beeping from above. He puts down the metal pole he fund, don't ask where, maybe he broke something while trying to open the panel...Anyway...the beeping! Yes, he puts down the pole and goes back up. He can see a familiar ship coming his way from the scans. 

With a smile on his face Lance sits down and opens the communication. Lance makes a friendly gesture to the masked alien on the screen.

"hello darling, it's nice of you to come by to see little ol' me" Lance smiles, maybe with little too much force but now he don't really care much about it. So what if he needs to try to hard for his peace of mind? 

"Yes, it's good to see you too Lance" Regris says with amusement in his voice " would you mind to follow me? It's not only me who wants to speak with you. And everybody would be happy to see you in person"

Lance looked at his friend and thought of his friends among the Blade. Maybe there is no hurting in it if he takes a little detour and visits his friends. It would be good to see everybody else one more time, he would miss them and he would regret to not see them for the last time for Gods knows how long. 

"okay, lead the way" Lance nods at Regris and starts his engine. 

As Regris takes off he follows him without a hitch, they fly for another varga before Lance can see the moving base ship the Blade of Marmora uses as secondary base. According to Regris, it's really practical for the members who needs to move from one mission to another without the time to travel to the main base. It's a ship so they can be always on move and out of the sight of the Empire. 

Lance picks up the incoming call from Regris when they're near the base. 

"Okay, we got permission to dock in, they are waiting for us" he says then flies in the hangar with Lance following right behind him.

As Lance is walking down from his ship to the others he starts to regret coming. He did not thought that Kolivan will see him off too. And from afar, Kolivan did not looks like he's happy. Lance want to run and avoid his anger but now that he's five feet away he can't turn around. His feet is more heavy with every step and then he froze just before the leader of the Blade of Marmora, feeling like he is five again and his mother is about to scold him. But five times worse!! 

Steeling himself he takes off his helmet and looks up at the galran leader with worried eyes. 

Thankfully Lance can't see any anger in his eyes, only concern as the tall man meets his gaze. 

"Welcome Paladin, it's good to see you, but I'm sad that in these circumstances. I'm glad that you choosed to come here before your journey" with a strong hand grips on his shoulders and Lance can feel that he really is welcomed. He smiles up weakly, scratching his neck.

"Yeah... But it's _Ex-_Paladin now... So just calm me Lance" he smiles "or Leo, my family called me that back home" he adds, hoping to ease up the mood. "Regris surprised me but it's true that I wanted to see you guys once more before I be gone, where ever that will be..." he chuckles. Good, now he just want to hide in a hole. It's not their concern that Lance has no idea what he's doing, why is he trying to whine to them.

As Lance starts his self loathing Kolivan is sizing him up, then his ship and then he nods at Regris.

"Right, I heard about it from Regris but if it's not too much of a trouble, I want to hear more from you, Leo" Kolivan tells him and Lance can feel feet move as he starts to lead him away from the ship, through a door and deeper in the base. "currently there is only a few members here but you can meet them at dinner time. There is nothing urgent right now so I'm completely free, please don't spare the details. With your earth saying, I'm all ears."

This made Lance smile truly, to think that the always stoic and pokerfaced Kolivan would be the one to use a saying that Lance teached to some of his alien friends. How the heck did it reached Kolivan? And he called him Leo before it. Total shock.

Lance suspected it before... but could this tall and scary alien be a fluffy ball below all the hard steel?

"Alright, I tell you what I can... but there's really nothing much and it will be really boring so if you want to stop me you need to do it now or you get the full Lancey Lance storytelling bundle" he jokes weakly as they reach a room, that suspiciously looks like the meeting room he was in in his first briefing. Oh, good times, good times.

Kolivan walks to the circular desk and sits down, without any second thoughts Lance sits down beside him. It's not a formal meeting so he can be a bit friendly. 

"please do as you please, I will listen until the end" Kolivan nods at him and after considering the possibilities Lance starts to speak.

For how long he speaks, he don't knows, but after the first sentences he can't stop, everything spills out of him. Some time after he started Regris joins them too and silently listens to Lance.

He starts at the Garrison, he tells them how everything started and then their life on the castle-ship. He talks about team dynamics and fights, how they worked as a team, how they lived as a family but how everything changed slowly. How bad everything was when Shiro disappeared and how hard he and Coran worked to keep them together and functional. How things gotten better after some time just to turn for the worse again when they found Shiro. How he lost his place and how he fought to gain it back. How he failed and how he got his decision about his future.

"And after that Coran gave me all these cool gears and I took off. And now I'm here, oh and I got a really cool phone like device so I can write to Coran when I have the chance." Lance sits down,_ when did he stood up??, _and looks at Regris and Kolivan. They really listened to him, they listened to everything, the only one who knows all this is Red, but they shared their mind so it's not really count.

He waits for them to digest all the information he poured at them. He spoke a lot, if his sore throat is from it and not frome the suppressed tears.

Will they laugh and call him weak and useless? Are they thinking about how to get rid of him now that they know how pathetic he is? When they look at each other, silently communicating, Lance wants to scream at them to say something, curse him or mock him, anything, but he clench his fists and stays silent. Trembling a little as he waits for their judgment.

Kolivan finally turns to him with an unreadable expression and... grips his shoulder firmly and gaves Lance a reassuring squeeze. 

"You worked hard Leo. Thank you for telling us." he says with his usual pokerface but his voice is warmer and it takes everything for Lance to not to start crying. 

"After knowing all this we really don't want to let you go without any solid ground beneath your feet. Space is vast and dangerous for a lone soldier so I have a proposal for you." Kolivan looks at him seriously but he still holds on Lance's shoulder with a firm but gentle hand. "Stay with the Blade for a while. We train you a little more, we prepare you for the hardships you may face in the future. We make sure that you are as ready as one can be for the war you joined, so stay and train with us."

Lance blinks. And then blinks again. 

_Whaaat?! _

“What?! But... I... I don't have galran blood.... I'm not a Blade... I'm... I'm just _me_! I know I don't have a solid plan... But I was always good at improvisation... I can't..." Lance looks Kolivan in the eye" I don't want to burden you guys... I will be only a nuisance..."

Kolivan shakes his head but before he can say a word Regris spoke up. 

"It's not a charity, nor pity. You're a good soldier Leo. You already helped us a lot and it would be a shame to loose a powerful ally like you because you're alone in space without the sufficient knowledge to stay alive. With our help you will be stronger and more effective, that's good for us, for you and for the innocents you will help." Regris stands up and puts his hand on Lance's free shoulder" and we are selfish. Because the biggest reason is that we don't want to let you go out of our sight, Leo. Not because you're strong ally, but because you're our friend."

Kolivan grips his shoulder with a little more force but it's not hurts Lance as he looks back at him with wide eyes. 

"That's right. And you don't need to worry about being a Blade. You're a great friend of the Blade of Marmora, you have the right to stay with us if you want to. You fought for us, with us. You would honor us with your stay. Of course, it's your choice, we will accept what your decision is, so take your time to decide."

Lance is shocked. 

He did not expected this. He did _not_ expected this.

He looks wide eyed at these two alien. These galran. These space ninjas. These two mad _idiot. _

He looks at these two man and can't stop his tears. What did he do to have these two as his _friends_? How can they say these things to him with such a confidence? Are they serious? They looks seriously.

Lance slowly pinches his arm and then blinks again, getting rid of his tears. It's not a dream and it's not likely that he died.

So this is real!

They really offered him to stay with the Blade for training. He can stay here for a little and be better so he can help more people and he will not die meaninglessly before time. 

They really told him that he is their friend. He can stay here and spend a little time with his friends... Maybe he can help more to them, so he can be for use in his stay. 

Lance quickly rubs away his tears and looks at them with a determined fire in his eyes. 

"Yeah... I want to train with you guys" he smiles and then gives them his usual cocky smile "one can't get enough of this fine piece of art, I would be cruel to take away it from you " he winks at them.

Kolivan's eyes don't even flutter as he ignores the cheeky line but Regris huffs with a smile, murmuring something, too quietly for Lance to hear. 

_Yeah, _Lance smiles.

He can finally see some hope. Maybe with the Blade's help he really can become stronger. With his friends' help he can help the innocents. 

Yeah, sounds like a plan. Lance laughs and follows the two of them to the canteen to meet the others. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As usual please leave a comment and a kudo if you liked, it gives a fuel to me and I'm really curious about your thoughts <3
> 
> Thank you and see you soon \\(^¬^) /


	8. Let's see

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hi!  
I just made these pics so you guys can see how i imagined Lance's new weapons and look.  
As time goes, he will not cut his hair and he would sweep back his locks, but he would not let it grow longer than that.
> 
> I hope you like it :3

Lance's new armor.

The new pistols and rifle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So our boy looks like this from now on<3 His hair will not be longer than this :D  
I hope you like it!


	9. Changes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yahoo, there is the next chapter :3  
Why do our loved ones grew so fast?
> 
> Just imagine, Lance is smaller than the blades with a head at least. So he can kick their shin with easy in a fight :D
> 
> Hard work and hard work, if you want something you need to work hard for it.

At dinner, Lance met with some of the Blades. They were on the base for a quick breath and briefing, some of them were open for some talking with Lance and he was happy for the welcoming air. It looked like they don't mind his presence and he was even invited to sit amongst them. They ate together and Lance was a little lighter when he got to sleep. His room was empty, only a bed and a table was in there but there weren't more room for anything else. He changed and flipped on the bed and thought of the future and the past. What will happen from now on? He want to help the others just like before so he can ask Kolivan about it, he went to missions before with them so Lance don't thinks it impossible. When he finally made some progress his eyes started to grow heavier and he started to slip in the darkness, he was safe and warm so he let himself drift away. 

The next day Lance, Kolivan and Regris departed and travelled to the main base, they said Lance will train there until he's ready. When they arrived Kolivan needed to supervise one of the ongoing missions so he left Lance with Regris. Regris helped him take his things to his room, he got a bed in a room with five beds, a lower bed next to the door was free and he happily accepted it. He knew one of the five roommates he has from before and the others looked nice too. He introduced himself to everybody and learned their names, made a friendly atmosphere. It was nice to meet his roommates so fast and Lance was really glad that he was not alone in an empty room. Back home he shared a room with Marco and Louis and he was never alone, this shared room was more comfortable for him than then one back at the castle. 

It was a little surprise that nobody seemed surprised with his appearance, they were like always when he visited. Lance was afraid that other than Kolivan and Regris the others will be hostile and against his presence but thankfully his fears did not come true.

Regris gave him a full tour on the base so he can find his way on his own later. Lance tried to draw a map in his head and learn the ways but he was always bad with directions. The corridors and rooms were a total labyrinth for the first time so he concentrated on the main paths. Bed-room to canteen, bed-room to the training hall, training hall canteen and of course the hangar from the other three. He tried hard but for a phoeb he got lost a lot of times, thankfully the blades were patient with him and helped him out in his need. After his first phoeb with the blade he learnt to see the diffenerce in each corridor and learnt his way around. 

After some time he noticed a strange pattern. When he had some free time and wandered around the halls and encountered someone they chatted with him for a little while they walked with him, how did he always encounter people with the same destination? 

It was weird. 

Regris showed him the training room and after a day Lance joined in. 

The Blade of Marmora has trainees, in the number of twenty-four. They all are in a different age and different stages in the training but all of them is hardworking and friendly. Lance can see the determination on every training, they all work so hard for the sake of others. Maybe the blades' coldness and unfriendliness is for outsiders only and everybody is like Kolivan? If so, how did Lance earned this treatment? He was afraid that the members will be cold towards him but he feels really welcomed at the base and with every quintant he feels more like a family with the blades. 

The instructor of the trainees is a Blade as big as Antok with a similar build but Lance saw scales on his arm so he must be a half-blood. His name is Dhalnok and he has a really strong voice with sharp eyes. When a trainee made a mistake Dhalnok was fast to correct them and improve their technics. He looked really strict but he was fair with the trainees. 

He welcomed Lance among the trainees and trained him just as hard and strict as the others. Dholnak was considerate of the human build in his training but still expected the maximum and more from Lance, thanks to that Lance was dead tired every quintant and could not worry unnecessarily. 

As always, Lance was good with his rifles but lacked in hand to hand and close combat. He was the best when it comes to shooting but he barely could hold his ground against the others in close combat, but he was determined and trained with his hardest every day and worked harder than ever. It was the environment or the mode he trained but it felt more effective than before.

Lance was small but quick on his feet and very agile, when he was calm he could outwit his enemies in the fight. Together with Dhalnok they made a fighting style for Lance and when he finally understood it Lance became more effective than ever. 

Thanks to Dhalnok and the other trainees, Lance improved, fast. He had the basics before but now he finally started to jump levels. He has gotten faster and stronger. He learned the ways of fighting against bigger and stronger enemies. He was now a worthy opponent against the others.

But not only that. He learned to fight better with his sword and learned new weapons. Dagger, axe, staff, spear, bow and whip, if you drop him off somewhere he could find a weapon to use now. He especially loved to use the whip, it went good with his fighting style and has a lot of ways to use, it was just as agile as him and Lance quickly got a hang on it. That's why he got one for himself the first time he had the chance, a really cool mecha whip, in base mode it looks like a baton but it expanded when Lance turned it on. Lance _loved_ it. 

The first time, he showed his sniper abilities to Dhalnok, the tall man was silent for three whole dobosh. After that, he burst out laughing and talked so fast in the older galran language that Lance could not understand him. So he just stood there and waited patiently for him to finish his rant and tell him what he just talked about. When he looked around the others were a little shocked too but when they caught Lance's eyes they smiled at him encouragingly. 

When the instructor finally calmed down he appointed Lance to the shooting range as instructor to teach the blades how to shoot as he does. After consulting with Coran he helped to make snipers for the Blade of Marmora and Kolivan contacted with Voltron for their patronage. When he started, Lance was little doubtful with his ability to teach, but he was determined to show them everything he knows, if they learn how to do it, they will not be dependent on Lance only and they will have an advantage against the Empire. 

In the beginning, Lance made a deal with Kolivan. While Lance's intention is to fight and help freeing planets, Lance needed training but he still didn't wanted to abandoned the innocents he could help. So Kolivan made a condition for him and his stay that they both were satisfied. 

Lance will stay in the base and train until Kolivan sees that he is ready and occasionally he would go for a mission where his skills are needed. As a trainee would go to missions in the later half of the training, but not alone, in groups of two or three, as everybody. 

It was a good deal for Lance, because, with it, he could be still useful while he is in training. It was good because with it he can be useful, he wants to avoid being a nuisance to the Blade as much as possible.

Lance worked hard, he trained, taught shooting and went to missions whenever he could. Besides from fighting in the training hall, his routine contained engineering and hacking, a little first aid and lessons about how to read different species from their body language (Lance was always good at reading people so it was one of his strongest points). From now on he will be alone, he will not have Coran and the altean's technologie to the knowledge he needs, from now on he needs to be independent and Kolivan made sure to teach everything to Lance. 

It amazed him how much knowledge the Blade has. When he asked about it, Kolivan smiled and told him the reason. 

"_When you're alone in space, there could be always a crisis that you need to solve. Of course, we have experts in every field but when badly injured on an enemy ship, you need to take care of yourself. Or when your ship got shoot and you are stuck on a planet you need to know how to repair it, because there will be nobody to help you out."_

Lance understood what he meant and he worked harder to learn everything he could. He saw how a little detail can save your life in need. 

Quintant after quintant, Lance spent his time in the fullest and worked hard. Of course ha had some fun here and there too. Like the time when he had a giant sleepover with everybody, they helped each other grooming their fur (or hair in Lance's case) and they slept or just lied down in one giant pile.

Lance grew closer to the blades and spent time with them, he talked about everything and listened to them, he fought alongside them and helped them when they needed. He was happy to provide some support to them, the war is hard on them too. 

He quickly got accustomed to his routine in the base. He talked to Coran on a weekly basis, they talked about what they doing and how they were, but never about Voltron. Lance could feel of their conversations that Coran is tired and it made him sad that he could not help the old altean more than easing up his mind.

Lance spent six phoeb like this. In the first movements Lance could not help but drop on his bed at night and sleep like dead til morning. And now that he stands before the mirror in the bathroom (that he brought) and he could see a different Lance.

When was the last time he saw himself? Until yesterday he did not have a mirror so it was on the castle of lions.

The Lance back there was a dead-eyed hollow shell of the once happy and shining boy. 

When Lance learned that the blade don't have a mirror in the entire base he searched one every time he could. It took six phoeb because he don't really go out of the base besides missions but he finally found one. Yesterday he was in a space mall and he found this treasure and brought it back with him, it was so dirty that he hardly saw anything in it and when he got back he was so tired that he went to sleep immediately. He had a nightmare so he woke up and could not sleep back so he cleaned the mirror and put it on the wall. 

When he put it on the wall he didn't expected anything new. He didn't expected to see a Lance so different that he's hardly recognize himself. 

The Lance back with the Paladins was skinny even with his muscles and was pale. If you took a look at him the first impression was that he was lanky. His eyes were dull and lifeless, the beautiful blue eyes lost their shine from the hardships of the war. Back then he always wondered where is that good looking guy with the charming smile and model like body he knew.

Now his eyes are full of life, the shine from back then is back like before but stronger with a confident shade in them.

His face looks healthy and the smooth smile gives him a confident aura, he looks older but not old. He looks like his dad from a picture when he was in his twenties. Their relatives always told him that he looks like his father. 

He never believed them until now. 

His hair got a little longer and it's now slicked back with the space hair gel he found. He found it in a space mall and it's really good. The gel is strong and lasting, but he can wash it out when he needs to. It has a forest scent, how? Lance has no idea. 

He had muscles back then too, but now he's well-toned and he lost his skinny look, thanks to Dhalnok's training he could win in hand to hand against the others.

Now he feels and looks strong, well not like the blades, but with Earth standard. Of course he's not like Shiro, nobody can be as muscular and him and look so natural. No, Lance looks good, but not to that extent. 

He finally looks like a real soldier, not just a kid who pretends to be. Now he really looks like he could kill you without a flinch.

And it's true... How many life did he took already in this war? Too many. As a sniper he could not spare someone's life, he can't risk his teammates to get hurt. In the start Lance's hand shook when he shoot but after Hunk got hurt because he didn't killed a soldier he got determined. And now he don't even flinch when he shots someone in the head from close. Humans really can adapt to everything. 

He stopped his line of thoughts and started to get ready for the day. 

After he brushed his teeth and face he walks to the canteen and sits down with his food, just some goo and food bars. It's rather early in the base so there is only two blades except him in the room. He's not feeling very talkative right now so just mechanically eats his breakfast, wondering on today's events.

Today he has a mission, a big one and he is quite uneasy because of it. Oh, not because of the task he has or what they will be doing. 

They will fight to free a planet, if they can drive out the galra from it, it will be a great loss to the Empire. It's a mission Lance did a hundred times before, so it's not the reason that he can't sleep.

The reason is that the mission belongs to Voltron and the Blade of Marmora will assist them. Not everybody, only a select few, unfortunately Lance is amongst them. Kolivan asked if he wanted to do it or should he left him out and Lance considered saying no, but they need his skills and the inhabitants of the planet need his help, there are people who needs his help and he can help the Blade too. So he told Kolivan he is ready to do it. 

But he's not.

He's not ready to face Voltron. He finally found some inner peace and confidence, he don't want to see them and lost it all again. He don't want to see them work together and be stronger when he was with them. He don't want to see how happy they are that he's not there.

That's why he will blend in with the shadows and fight from the background. He will hide from them like his life depends on it. He needs to do his work properly, he can't let them to distract him. He can't let his team to get hurt. 

After checking the time Lance goes to the training area for a little distraction and warm up. He sent a quick message to Coran that he will be a part of the blade team, because the only positive part in this mission is that he can finally see his favorite space uncle again. 

When he stands in the fighting ring, he takes out his rifle and readies himself starting training. 

He spends four vargas fighting against bots, using various weapons. Not giving himself time to think about anything outside of the ring. When his watch's alarm sounds he stops with a sweaty forehead and he needs dive dobosh to calm down. When he's finally got back to normal he walks to the briefing.

The mission is nothing unusual, everybody knows the default protocol so the briefing is fast. They will help Voltron on the ground and cut out every enemy personnel they encounte. They will get rid off the commanders and back up the Paladins as they break in the systems. After the Paladin's left the base it's their job to get rid off any remaining galra.

Nothing new. 

Lance first priority is to watch everyone's back and be the backup where he's needed. He will move constantly between the groups and monitor the progress. He don't need to make contact with the Paladins, he only needs to watch over them. After he escorted the Paladin's out he joins in the cleaning. 

He can do his work from behind so thankfully he will not make contact with them. 

After the briefing, they depart to the castle of lions. Thanks to Allura's wormhole it's a really fast ride. From afar it looks exactly like he remembered but up close he sees more scratch than before. But of course, after all, it was six phoebs that he last saw the castle, they certainly has fights without him too, maybe even more

Lance changed a lot, but he can't help but check his armor and helmet as they dock in the castle's hangar. He didn't want to let the others recognize him. 

The Paladins looks normal as he walks down on the ramp with the others but he settles his eyes on Coran. The ginger man looks tired but has a big smile on his face as he founds Lance amongst the blades and Lance gives him a soft nod as greeting. He's happy to see the altean but after his greating Lance hides behind his helmet as he stands in the group of blades, using his smaller body to hide amongst them. 

He wants to listen to Kolivan as he speaks but after they came out of the wormhole Red found him, she won't stop talking and sending her emotions to him and Lance in return his own feelings. They have been doing this for thirty dobosh already and it's really distracting. It helps to not think about the humans before him but he starts to lose his grasp on his surroundings. 

Both groups walks up to the bridge to go through the plan for the last time. Kolivan is the only one who speaks from the Blades. Thanks to that, Lance can easily stay in the shadows with the others as they all chose to play statue at the wall. His armour different than the others' but he's still perfectly blending in, thanks to the shadows and he can now perfectly act like the blades, mimicking their stance he stands perfectly still, watching the map. 

The plan is exactly the same as Kolivan told them so Lance can relax and speak with Red. After Lance finished to tell her his life at the Blade they just blend together and Lance shuts his eyes, bathing in the warm presence of Red and gives her the best mind hug he can. 

After both side is satisfied with the plan the Blade goes back to the hangar. Back on the ship Lance gets ready for the mission with the others. 

If Lance paid more attention to the meeting maybe he would have noticed what everybody else did.

That the Paladins did not looked good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When you and your best friend meet again for a long time :D
> 
> It was a great trial for Lance. He needed to choose between his desire to help people or his desire to never see again the Paladins. I think he chose the right thing. The training of the Blade of Marmora is hard and full of trials because one needs to sharpen the mind and not only the body.
> 
> I dropped a comment at the end and you could guess what you will find in the next chapter :D
> 
> If you liked it please leave a kudo, a comment. They make my days better o(≧▽≦)o
> 
> See you at the next chapter.


	10. A new start?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Now I feel like it's time for us to take a look at Voltron.  
What happened after Lance left?
> 
> What was their reactions after they learnt that their teammate left?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let's jump back in time and take a look at the others from Pidge's pov.  
Have fun.

With a sharp gasp she sits up in her bed and in that one motion falls off of it. 

"Ah...arghh..." the sharp devices and tools on the floor are a little painful as she pushes herself up, looking around.

The nightmare that woke her up was a bad one about her family but it wasn't a rare occurrence. Still she got a little shaken up. As she calms down her headache and pain in the neck and back comes forth. 

That's what one gets for falling asleep across their computer and half done devices. 

Her clock says it's three in the morning in the castle's circle. It's not surprising that she was asleep, they had a hard battle before she got back to her room but she still started to work on one of her projects. 

Only after a shower, of course. She's a girl after all and a shower feels good after a hard battle.

Frowning she stands up, after her nightmare she could not sleep back so it's better to get something to drink and snack so she could continue her work. After pulling on her socks she walks out from her room and walks in the direction of the kitchen. 

"Still...it's weird..." she can't help wondering. Before when Pidge dozed off during her work she always found herself lying comfortably on her bed, tucked in her blanket. No matter where, always in her bed. Even when she was certain that she was in Green's hangar working on her or when she was hiding from everybody so she can finish her assignment for Hunk or Shiro. 

But thinking about it, it was not that common. Most of the times she was found by Lance and dragged to the bed before she can pass out from exhaustion. It's really annoying that Lance always interrupts her work. She just want some peace and silence so she can do her work. Why has Lance so much free time to always bother her? He should do something productive instead. 

"haaa..." with a deep sigh she puts her hand on her forehead. No, he _does_ productive things, she's just tired, angry and annoyed to the sting in her neck and she directed her anger at him. Lance is the one who always finds him sleeping somewhere, no matter when, why didn't he found her today too? "Ahh...." Why is her head aching this much? Why did she dreamed about her father and brother? She just want to sleep, she's so _tired_.

Pushing down on her temple she shakes her head slowly. Why is she so annoyed at him again? Why is he so unreasonable and unpredictable? With how much he knows and how he behaves are on a totally different level. Why does he resemble so much to Matt? _In everything?_

No, not everything. 

Matt has more confidence, Lance just faking it. 

It drives her mad every time. 

That irritating faking. Why is he so idiot to always stuck to that idiot behavior? They and Hunk could work out a lot of problems if Lance would just stop his idiotic tendencies. 

_Argh..._Don't even talk about Hunk, he's always spoils him. Thanks to that Pidge is the bad cop and she needs to beat out of Lance that mask. 

It's not that hard because she's always angry whenever she sees that fake smile on his face. Or whenever he makes a stupid comment that she knows he knows better. She just wants to beat him up 'til he behaves. Her anger always takes out the worse of her and she latches everything at him. And he just _takes_ it! Even provoking it!

She's so angry! 

Her head hurts so much!!!

She's so occupied in her thoughts that she only notices the light in the kitchen when she's before the door. Weird, nobody should be in here at this time. Curiosity picked she peeks in through the gap that left open. 

It's Coran. Sitting at the counter with a mug in his hands. She almost called out to him but then she notices his expression and she froze in an instant.

She never saw the altean advisor in such a ...melancholic state. His lips are drooped and his shoulders are hunched, his head hangig between them. His eyes are always full of life and happiness, now she can't see anything else just sorrow in them. 

She wants to go there and comfort him but she's bad with emotions and they are not that close, she's not confident that she could help Coran. 

Lance!

Yes, the two of them are close, Coran adores Lance and Lance is good with emotions, maybe the best amongst them. Yes, she could talk to Lance about it when he wakes up and Lance can comfort Coran for sure. If it's Lance then Coran will open up to him in no time and they can do whatever they do when they are together.

With a nod she approves her plan and walks away from the door. But now she left without her drink and her snacks and her aches are stronger. Her eyes are heavy and she drags her legs with every step. She can't work like this, but she can't sleep at her room, it's too cold and lonely.

_Green._

She can go to Green, there she could sleep for sure.

And when she wakes up he will look for Lance.

"Yeah...let's do this..." she murmurs through yawns and walks to the hangar to the Green Lion and huddling up in the pilot's seat she drifts out in a flash.

\---

*beep beep beep*

Groaning, Pidge shuts down her clock, why did she make this thing so annoying? She stretches out her back and stands up from the pilot seat. It's breakfast time and she's hungry, she did not slept much but it was enough for now, she can function again with this amount.

The Green Lion is silent, she can't hear her constant buzzing in her mind but she brush it off as she's just sleeping.

After popping her back again she walks out of her Lion and the hangar, heading to the kitchen to join the others. After they eat she can talk to Lance to talk to Coran.

She walks in the kitchen, greeting the others as she sits down on her usual seat. Keith looks grumpy as ever, Hunk is half asleep as always at the morning and Shiro is talking in hushed tones with Allura. 

Peaceful like always. Pidge pulls a bowl of goo to herself and starts to eat, waiting for Lance and Coran to come too. The both of them are missing from the table so maybe Lance found Coran before she can say anything. Good job McClain.

As she takes another bite she feels lighter and can enjoy her food. After Hunk woke up a little she speaks with him about her work she wants him to take a look. 

When they all finished and she starts to wonder why the missing two did not came, Coran walks in, but there is no annoying laughter or joke coming so Lance is not with him. Coran has the same eyes from when she found him before. That's not good, no matter how Coran tries to act like always but his eyes are shining from sadness. 

"Paladins, there is something important that I must tell you all." Coran starts and looks at every one of them, with a look Pidge can only see like disappointment and sadness. "

" If it's that important why don't we wait for Lance? He's not here, have you seen him?" Hunk spoke up with a nervous voice. Pidge can almost see as every possible bad scenario comes to his mind and she wants to comfort him but she can't. Lance is the one who always pulls him out of his panic attacks but he's not here. AGAIN. Where the heck is he when they need him?! 

As Hunk is starting a panic attack and Pidge is fretting out, Coran slowly shakes his head and sighs. 

"No, unfortunately he's the news..." Coran sighs again and shakes his head "Lance is gone. Number three is gone and left his armor and bayard. I checked the Lions, the Red Lion has her barrier up." he finishes and sits down defeated, leaving the room silent, they could hear the faint mumble of the ship as the bomb settles down. 

Pidge is shocked and could only blink as she's putting everything together. 

Lance disappeared after the fight, he didn't even came for dinner. Why did she found Coran in the kitchen and why does he looks so sad. She found him just after Lance left! If she woke up earlier she would see and could stop him!

She starts to feel like crying so she turns to the only solution she knows. Turning her sadness into anger.

"How could he doing something so stupid!? How can he run away from his responsibilities? Why is he such an idiot?!" she's burning of anger, nearly screaming until Hunk takes her hand and she looks down at him, when did she stand up? She slides down back to her seat and shakes her head" how could he do this? That idiot..."she starts to burn out so she's only squeezed back Hunk's hand, fuming silently.

She looks at Hunk, surprised that he did not started to panic only to see that he is in total shock, face pale and his grip is stronger with every tick. She doesn't pulls away though, this is the only comfort she can give to him.

How can Lance do something like this? They need him! He is the Blue Paladin! Not only they can't form Voltron without him but he is her brother! They are a family! How can he abadon everything and run away?

She can feel her arms shaking as she grips Hunk's hand and the chair. She can't lose another brother, she can't stand it... Why did he leave? Without telling anyone?

It's not good. She can feel his emotions coming forth and her eyes wetting, but the next instant she hears a spiteful snort and she frozes.

"This is another of his attempts to get attention? How can he be more pathetic as times goes on? Or is he got so scared that he needed to run away?" the voice of Keith is angry and hateful. How can he speak like this?

Shiro grips Keith shoulder and Pidge is relieved to see Shiro still has his sanity. 

"We have bigger problems than that Keith, if he left we are one Paladin sort, we can't form Voltron like that and we can't fight without Voltron." WHAT THE QUIZNAK??!! What the hell Shiro? It's Lance they are talking about, shouldn't they, like, go and bring him back? And then beat him until he promises that he never do something so idiotic again, ever!

" Don't worry about that Shiro, we are certainly enough." Allura smiles at Shiro with his' princes' smile "now Keith can take back the Red Lion and you can go back to the Black Lion. Everything perfect" she smiles and Pidge want to punch her in the face.

"Yeah" Keith nods" now we can be better, without anyone holding us back we could fight better than ever" he laughs and Allura and Shiro happily follows the conversation but Pidge blocked out. Maybe they are right, but they still need to find Lance and bring him back! But it looks like they are happy that Lance is gone?

They just talk and talk. When Pidge search for Coran to see his reaction but the old altean is gone. She wants to go too, she feels drained and like curling on his bed and cry. The other three are still talking shit and she's just so fed up from them so now.

She starts to take a big breath to scream a them and then run away but suddenly Hunk hits the table, _hard_, and stands up. He's silent and his eyes burning with so much emotion that she can't read them.

Hunk looks slowly at them and then walks out of the kitchen in an intimidating way, Pidge could never guess the big guy is capable.

After the door slid shut again the kitchen fall silent again.

That three is just as surprised as she. But Pidge is angry too, so she slowly stands up to and without a word she walks out too. 

She's not stopping until her room and there she starts to work. 

No matter what the others think, she will do everything she can to bring back that idiot. 

That stupid idiot! This prank is too much.

\---

After a week she has nothing and she's really frustrated.

She worked hard but somehow Lance managed to get off any radar possible. 

He's just vanished!

With a frustrated cry she kicks at the door and walks up to the bridge in full gear.

They will go to their first mission without Lance. Keith, Shiro and Allura are in full spirits.

They trained togheter and with the Lions too. It frustrated her but they really were powerful, but different. So different... and now they are going to real battle and she is a little worried. And confused. Definitely confused.

The Red Lion welcomed back Keith instantly. She has her barrier up but when Keith went back to her she lowered it down without a fight.

The castle is more cold than ever. Yeah, the three are talking at food time but Coran did not show up for this week and Hunk did not spoke a word. At least not when she could hear.

Pidge did not spent too much time with the team either, she worked every free hour she had. All in vain. She has nothing. 

And when she walked in she felt more alone than ever. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was a little hard for me because i could not decide whom perspective i want to tell.  
I made a version from everybody's side and finally decided that it would be best if i write from Pidge's pov. 
> 
> As for why? 
> 
> Well, she has a rational view of the world and she always looks for reasons, trying to look at things without bias.  
It could not be Hunk because he's too biased towards Lance. Keith is too but in a completely opposite sense. Shiro is not close enough to him and too big of a jerk in my head, just like Allura. (Season 8 left a bad taste in my mouth about her)  
It was hard to choose between Pidge and Coran, but i'm more familiar with Pidge. I didn't wanted to make a Coran who is not the beautiful man he is.  
I hope you liked it :) If you did, please leave a comment/kudo, they warm my heart <3
> 
> In the next chapter we will continue our journey with the Paladins.  
See you until then
> 
> Ps. If you see some mistakes please tell, at the last part I wrote instead of sleeping ><


	11. Weird one

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let's see how things going.  
Pidge is a genius but she can be so dumb sometimes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We continue to see things from Pidge's perspective.  
Enjoy... (⌒▽⌒)☆

"Watch out! Keith! On your six!" came Shiro's shout as Pidge tries to fight off the galran ships, surrounding her. She lets out a frustrated grunt as a fighter jet slams in Green and she's almost tossed out of her seat but she managed to sit, only squeezing her arm between her and her armrest. 

"Argh...Shiro! I'm in trouble too! They surrounded me! I need backup!" she shouts but can still hear as Allura is having a hard time herself. Hunk is still silent but she can hear a grunt and some angry murmur here and there. She can't see the other Lions as they all got separated but Green is not in a good shape, she could not do this too long. 

Pidge is angry beyond her mind, she got injuries and somehow she has gotten shot more times than the usual. She's injured like the first time they have a battle against the galra when they started the space adventure and they did not understand anything. They are doing the maneuvers they used a thousand times already without a hitch but now she feels vulnerable at every tick and gets damage at situations she never did before. She gets damaged where she should not if they were doing the maneuvers right. Why? In training, they did so well. They worked good together. 

But now they are a shitty teamwork. 

A non-existent one. 

Like clue, an enemy comes from the back and attacks her and Green's warning light switches on.

Frustrating. 

The whole situation is frustrating. 

Another angry grunt from Keith and a quiet angry murmur from Hunk in the comms makes Shiro finally giving them the retreat order.

Pidge watches the Yellow Lion fly back in a groggy manner and she follows after them, only stopping in Green's hangar. 

Green practically crashing down to the floor. 

"Everybody is on the deck in ten" came the last word from their leader, a tired and weak voice. Pidge drops her shoulders, letting the tension go away as she feels as Allura opened a wormhole and sent the castle away to safety. The radio is dead and she pulls off her helmet and looks at her consoles with a complicated look, analysing the battle. 

From the start Green felt distant, she needed to put more strength in everything she did and it still felt off. In the battle, she saw that the other Lions were struggling too but near the end, she lost sight of them. But the battle was not too hard until they formed Voltron. They formed Voltron for a little but she did not feel the power like always, no, she felt the powers pulling in all directions, away from each other. There was no connection between the Paladins or was just so little that she could not feel it. 

At all. 

No wonder a hard strike left them disconnected and they were surrounded by the enemy from all directions. They were quiznaked.

They fought hard for a long time but they were more damaged with every dobosh. They did not work together as a team. Hunk did not speak, Keith went ahead alone and did not listen to anything Shiro said. Shiro and Allura tried to stay together but they were overwhelmed too. It was all a mess. 

Shouting and cursing and blaming.

Nothing new.

Still, it felt so awful without a loud and cheerful voice. 

She sighed and went to the bridge to get it done so she could hide away in her room. 

\---

As time went on, it only got worse.

Well, not everything. 

After some hard battles and close calls, they finally learned how to fight together without Lance to watch their back. 

When Pidge understand why they suck as a team now and brought it up she caused a big shouting match. She brought it up at breakfast one day, they ate silently and only with the minimum words spoken when she finally got enough courage to speak about Lance and some of them did not receive it well. The theme was only good for a little anger channeling. They were arguing all day. 

Coran fleed from the room after a little but what surprised Pidge was Hunk. Hunk spoke to them nearly nothing in the past few days but after Shiro's utterly foul comment on Lance, he burst out.

Hunk was terrifying. He gave them a piece of his mind (a big piece) and Pidge saw in the eyes of Allura and Shiro that they understood something after that. 

What was that she could not tell but she wrote down to herself to never anger the big guy again without Lance to calm him down. 

Thanks to Hunk, they got back (or close to) to their track. They trained together more than before to improve their teamwork and thanks to that Voltron did a little better. 

And nobody talked about a certain Blue Paladin. It was like they forgot that he's still missing and their family is not whole. 

She could see why Hunk is avoiding everybody. 

She doings that too. 

Pidge still worked every day until she finds herself lying where she passed out from exhaustion. She was exhausted and hungry because she forgot almost always to eat and the one who made her is missing. And this fact made her more desperate to find him. 

She got angrier with every day she could not find Lance. How did that goofball managed to disappear without a trace? She could not find anything, not even the altean ship he took. Somewhere he needed to go but where can a well now man like the Blue Paladin go without being seen? It frustrated and amazed her at the same time. 

While she worked the team fell apart more and more. They could fight at the bare minimum but in the castle it was cold and empty. Nowhere a smile or a laugh, nothing, just coldness. They never interacted outside of missions and nobody made the first step for reconnecting.

Without Lance, all their bad habits came forward.

Keith trains more and more, working himself out 'til Shiro needs to drag him out to eat and sleep. Not always with success. Pidge once saw a bite mark on Shiro's human hand.  _ What the hell Keith?  _

Allura got possessed with the war and her responsibilities to the universe. She comes back more defeated after every hard battle. Pidge once heard her hushed whispers to Shiro that she can feel Blue' s disappointment and grudge against her. That the Blue Lion only lets her in for the missions and she's locked out between them without a word.

With how Keith behaves after the battles, Pidge has a strong guess that he has a similar problem. Not like she will pity them, they brought it on themselves. Pidge is not better, she had some problem too but she worked things out with her Lion.

The odd things did not stop there though.

Shiro is just like when they first found him (nightmares and all that good stuff) and in plus he got a little cruel in fighting and with them. Cold remarks and pointless blaming, everything she never saw him doing. He had a fight with Keith too so from then on the two bothers are apart too. Everybody is cold and sad. Hunk is cold and sad, sometimes Pidge sees his friend working in secret, no question in what but she can't help him, he's not letting her.

The only one in their sorry group who looks functional is Coran.

Yeah, he's not as cheery or friendly with them like before but he's doing his work without a problem. Seemingly not disconcerted with Lance's absence, he doings his work like always. Pidge saw him looking at a phone-like device in secret with a look, that she could not describe. He looks happy, fond and sad at the same time but with a shaky smile and tears in his eyes. She never saw him like that before and it makes her sad. Maybe it's a picture of his family? She wants to ask, but she can't, the old altean's attitude is similar to the Yellow Paladin's, closed off from the team, speaking just the bare minimum.

Coran, Hunk and Lance. 

The three people who kept the emotions stable and Voltron on the ground.

And now that the balance is broken, it's painfully obvious that Coran and Hunk needed someone to keep  _ them _ stable.

That was Lance. 

And they left their last wall of defense alone.  _ No.  _ They attacked it and it finally broke down. Leaving them defenseless.

When she finally understood the cause of their problems, it was too late. But the Green Lion saw it and accepted her back, they made things up with each other at least and Green saw how hard Pidge work in to get Lance back. With the help of Green, Pidge started to work to get close to Hunk again. 

It was hard, but Hunk was lonely too and accepted her back after some time. Not fully as they were before, just so she can join in her work to search together for Lance, but it was still more than she could hope so. And thanks to him she could have a small conversation with somebody about Lance. She learned why Hunk is so closed off, he's blaming himself too, but he's blaming the others too. He told her that he saw some hints that something wrong but thought nothing of it and ignored it. What if he had the courage to stand up against Shiro and Allura he could have helped Lance a little. 

Most of the time they were working silently but Pidge was grateful for the company. 

Weeks after weeks went by. The castle remained cold, the Paladins broken and the fights hard, but they managed. It was not as good as the trio thought the first day but they didn't die. They could not take on large galra settlements or free planets without help from the rebels or the Blade of Marmora but they lived.

On the way, she found her brother and after that with his brother's help, her dad. The only person left on her radar is still like a ghost.

Her brother, Matt, went back to the rebels to work there and the castle left empty again. 

The days went by, work, fight, work, eat and sleep when she lost consciousness. 

And finally, Allura's patience had run out. She and Shiro planned a big scale mission with the Blade of Marmora.

The planet of Chreyemn is in a strategic place and has important resources. The Alliance needs the planet and it will be a great loss to the Empire. Allura is beyond excited and has more spirit now, thinking they have the strength to move forward. 

She is a little sceptical with this but the leaders of Voltron decided to do something and so she can only comply.

\---

When the time came, the Blade of Marmora came with their ship. Looks like this mission is really big because Pidge never saw this much Blade at once in a mission. All dark and silent giants with their masks on, keeping their secrets. They always awaken her curiosity and so she studies them as much as she can. Trying to find out more and more with every little movement. 

Oh

There's a small one. 

Well, they  _ seem  _ small only near the Blades, it looks like they are taller than Pidge if she compares how she looks beside them. 

He has a little bit of different armor. 

They are a different race? But the Blade of Marmora only has galrans. So they are half galra and the other half is the stronger blood in them like Keith? 

They are in sync with the other blades as they walk but they look like they are hiding. He's blending in the group almost perfectly. 

Oh! He peeked out to see something and with a nod blended in once again, better than before. Weird.

After some idle talk, Allura leads everybody to the bridge and they all start the briefing. Well, more like Kolivan, Shiro and Allura doing the briefing, everybody else is silent in the room. 

Pidge should concentrate on it but she is too curious about the weird one. Finally, she can see them again when the Blade made a line next to the wall. For a moment they were on the light and Pidge saw their armor more clearly. 

It  _ is _ different from the normal Marmora armor.

But why?

They are standing in the dark with the other Blades, still like a sculpture and listening. (maybe, she can't tell with their weird mask on and their head is not moving)

When she had enough and it looks like the talking is in a safe zone, she speaks up, looking at Kolivan. 

"Who is that small one? They look different from everybody, are they new? " Pidge says and looks back at the small one. Not even a flinch or a move with fingers as she talks about them. Why are all the Blades are so good with remaining motionless or are they just ignoring her? When she hears a humm, she looks back at the tall galra with searching eyes.

Of course, Kolivan has his perfect poker face on, as always, fuck him. Pidge is really hating him right now. Fuck it, she hates every one of them for being so secretive, she can't even hack them to get her answers. 

"He is a different species, but an honorable member. You don't need to worry about him." Kolivan looks at the on in question and Pidge's chin falls down. A non-galra who is an honorable member? What did he do to get that title? Kolivan's eyes are shining with amusement as he sees something that Pidge not on the small one, but as he looks back there is no trace of any emotion,  _ again,  _ argh... "He will work as the Paladins' backup, he will accompany you after your objective is done and stand guard as you're working. He is trustworthy and will do his work perfectly. There is nothing more I can tell you about him" Kolivan looks at Allura so they can finish the briefing as Pidge digest the information, trying to make some sense out of it. So the alien is a he, cool, and he's not galra, double cool. But how can that small and thin alien be their backup?! He looks like Keith could take him out in an instant but needs to be really strong if Kolivan gave him that role, maybe Pidge could corner him and get some information. She could find out more if he were closer but back at the wall and in the shadows she can't see him well. 

She wants to run there and grab the alien but Allura ends the meeting and the Blade walks out of the bridge at a fast pace. Did he sensed her bloodlust (for information) and run away from Pidge? Nice work, it will be hard to catch him but Pidge is hungry for answers and she slips out from the bridge to catch up before anyone can stop her. Not like they are going to stay there and have a small talk, she just doesn't want to stay there and watch the arguing between Shiro and Keith.

It became an everyday occurrence. 

When she's finally at the hangar, the weird Blade is in the ship already and because they all need to prepare the other blades do not let her in. 

Quiznack. She needs to meet him somehow differently. 

But she needs to prepare too so she promises to come back later and goes to Green.

Her Lion is excited, she has more life in her than the last couple of months but she can't really catch the cause as her emotions are flying like a hurricane.

_ Herehereherebackbsckthehearthheretheheartbluehearthfinallyherebackhomeherewholehomeherehearth _

The words are like drums in her head and there are rushing so she can't understand it. Rushing and repeating, making a headache for Pidge.

Just what she's needed. 

She can hear Allura announcing the jump and Shiro's order to go and win a battle through Green's hurricane and she shuts down them, ignoring the weird urging she feels. 

Why is Green so excited about this mission? 

She doesn't have time to figure it out so Pidge locks everything away in her head, focusing on the battle she's facing.

She will need all her concentration, she can figure out later what her Lion wants. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well? What do you think? Will Pidge found out who is that weird, small one? :D
> 
> I hope you enjoyed. If you did, please leave a kudo/comment for me <3  
Don't be hesitant, I'm curious a out your thoughts.


	12. A father's (?) thoughts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let's us see how Kolivan saw the past few phoebs :D
> 
> Enjoy... ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love Dads of Marmora too much :D you can't stop me  
I know it's usually going to Keith x Thace/Ulaz/etc... but I love Lance and you can't stop me to give him as much love as i can *evil(?) laugh*
> 
> well, anyway...  
i hope you will enjoy the image i have of Kolivan.

When Kolivan first heard of Voltron back and its new Paladins, he was sceptical.

It was so long that somebody heard of it that Kolivan had no hope in it. He thought it as another fairy tale the rebels spreading to improve moral. 

But as he worked and fought he heard more and more. It was not possible at that point that it's all just made out from a rebel's mind. As Voltron became busier and started to free more planets there were more whispers about the Paladins.

They could put in great danger the universe and all trey are working for if the Paladins are weak. So Kolivan had someone to gather more information about them to know if the Blade of Marmora could trust Voltron.

Thanks to that information Kolivan new more about that five Paladin than anybody in the universe. 

The Black Paladin has a strong and wise aura but the aliens are afraid of him because of his galran robot arm. He seems to have some mental problems but he's a capable soldier to shoulder the position of the leader of Voltron.

The Red one is more problematic. He's too hot-headed and quick to jump in action. Kolivan saw recordings of him going headfirst into battle, leaving his teammates to cover for him. The Red Paladin needed discipline before anything else.

There was the Yellow Paladin with a big body and intimidating appearance. From afar. When you interact with him you learn that he is the most kinder of all the Paladins. He has the potential to be a great Paladin but he is too peaceful for the war, too soft.

The current Green Paladin is just as curious and hungry for knowledge as all of the previous Greens. They were so small that Kolivan had honest troubles about accepting that this little thing is one of the mighty Paladins.

Kolivan heard a lot of things about the Blue Paladin. There were so many different images of him that it should be impossible for one person. However, when the Blade made his report about him, Kolivan needed to accept that the Blue Paladin is a true mystery.

The Paladins came from a planet far out of the system, at the border of the Empire and they all looked and acted so young. 

They were not a force he could trust at that time. 

As time went on the image of Voltron grew and Kolivan started to consider ally with them. The Paladins grew in their roles and became more known to everybody. He learned more about them and the Blue's mystery started to solve itself. Together with the Yellow he played his role as the leg perfectly and always acted in a way that was needed. Kolivan personally saw him once turning his bloodlust and bared fangs into a bright and calming smile, completely winning over everybody who faces that smile.

It was now easy to see why does he have this many different rumors about him, only one thing was constant.

Everybody loved him. 

You go to a planet that Voltron was on before and you can ask about him. Heroic, goofy, flirt, joker, anything but always spoken positively.

Perfect example of the old Blue Paladins behavior. The old rumors were true, the Voltron Lions really have a type.

(Kolivan would never admit that he laughed out loud when he came to this conclusion)

Yes, he heard that the Paladin was welcoming to everybody, more than anybody from Voltron, but Kolivan didn't have any particular impression of him. He just saw the young Paladin as a Paladin should be.

\---

The atmosphere they were in, in their first meeting with Voltron was just like Kolivan thought it would be. 

Awkward. 

Voltron was wary of them and the Princess was especially venomous.

The meeting was done in a blink thankfully and Kolivan was ready to say his goodbyes when the Blue Paladin walked to Regris with a serious expression. He looked like he would punch him if Regris utter a wrong word.

The Paladin stopped right before a stiff Regris and every blade watched them, ready to stop the Paladin if he makes a move.

When the tension grew almost unbearable the young Blue finally spoke.

"Do you guys purr when you're happy or pleased?"

He asked this absurd question with such a seriousness that Kolivan lost his words to reply.

Regris was the same, he just stood there like he turned to stone and watched the boy before him. What was this absurd situation? How can be this the first thing he ask from them? Shouldn't he be scared or distant from them? He should be despised of them! Not asking if they can purr like a house pet.

As Regris got a hold of his voice he slowly nodded. 

"Yes... Sometimes..." his voice was so quiet that Kolivan could question he even spoke but the Paladin's face got so bright and smiled at the Blade before him that it must be real.

"Cool man! The name's Lance, it will be awesome to work with you!" he offered his hand to Regris and he grabbed him as a greeting.

"Regris, it certainly will be Lance" 

Kolivan knew that the Paladin won over every blade in the room in that instant. 

He was proven right when back to the base, he could not hear anything else but whispers about the Blue Paladin. 

Kolivan was blind to not see it before. The Paladin was always welcoming and charming to everybody. He always knew how to build bridges. Why would the Blade of Marmora be different?

\---

After that they worked together with Voltron and Lance charmed everybody he met. Before Kolivan could do anything, the blades treated the young boy like he was a cub. They did it with little things but Kolivan understood it right away.

It was good to see the others be so lively after so long. The life came back to the base and they paid more attention to the missions to come back alive. Thanks to only one boy their success rate grew and the death rate went almost zero. 

But as things became better at the Blade of Marmora, things changed to the worse at Voltron. 

The Paladins lost the Black Paladin and after a hard time they found him but the dynamics already changed.

He saw how the brightness of Lance dulled and how sad he became so he invited the Paladins and Lance for missions. It was convenient and he was happy to see the boy regain his smile.

Everything became calm again, Lance was happy when Kolivan saw him before and after missions and he thought that was is. Voltron finally recovered from the damages.

But he was so wrong. 

He was not prepared for a call from Regris, saying that Lance is leaving Voltron. 

He was not prepared to see how broken the boy was when he arrived at the second base. If they let him go, he will be dead in a movement. Kolivan could not let him go now. 

So he proposed a good deal to  _ Leo.  _ (oh how warm Kolivan felt when they got this nickname)

Thankfully Leo accepted it and choose to stay with them. So Kolivan taught and trained him and Leo lived in the main base. After some time he joined in for missions and the boy became stronger than ever. Kolivan was proud to see how he could fight against everybody on the base and how good he became at the simulations.

The boy became family to everybody and Kolivan was happy to see him working hard every quintant.

Meanwhile, the Blade of Marmora was in contact with Voltron. They still worked together to free the universe from Zarkon's empire. Kolivan saw how the Paladins crumbled with every mission, only holding out with the last straw. He was disappointed to see how narrow-minded the Paladins were. He saw how missions failed because of it.

It was sad to see the Defenders of the Universe like this but he saw now what broke down Leo, what caused such a loyal soul to abandon them.

Maybe it was selfish but he did not speak to the Paladins about Leo's whereabouts.

He only spoke with the old altean advisor. He knew that Leo is keeping in touch with him and sometimes Kolivan told a tale about the boy to Coran. 

Time went by like this. He saw the fire in Leo's eyes and Kolivan knew it is time for him to go. No matter how much he wants, he can't lock him in the base, away from everything that could hurt him. Leo was ready and he has too many things to accomplish in this war.

Kolivan was ready to give him the go when the Black Paladin and the Princess came to him with a mission.

It was a mission too big for the current Voltron. The rebels could not help them this so they need the Blade of Marmora. Kolivan knew that they could fail in this mission like this, the Paladins are too unstable, to quick to fight and to blind to see. The blades could not do anything because the Princess is still too hateful towards galrans. They needed somebody who could handle them and guide them.

So he asked Leo to join in. 

Kolivan was not happy, but they needed him and the boy is perfectly capable of handling the Paladins. 

\---

He may be cruel but he did not regret his decision.

Kolivan is now on the castle ship's bridge with Coran, overseeing and managing the operation.

Leo's only wish was to not reveal his identity to the Paladins, so the marmora is using a plus channel and they listening in the Paladin's line. 

The blades were the first to assault the base, they silently got rid of everybody they could and when the Paladins joined in, Leo went after them, doing his job without them noticing.

As they proceed with the operation the risk of getting noticed grew and Kolivan heard the inpatient urging from the Paladins to the Green one to finish their hacking. When the data arrived at the castle's computer Kolivan turned on his mic. 

"Leo, we have the data, the Paladins are ready to go to the extraction. Be careful of the surroundings and join team 2 after the Paladins are in the air." 

"Roger! Thanks, Koli" with a cheerful tone the little dot on the map starts moving.

After thirteen dobosh the Paladins are on the way back to their Lions to finish the operation. The base's communication system is cut out and all the living personnel dead.

All is left to repeat this process seven more times and the planet is free. 

\---

At the sixth base, an alarm went off and the remaining forces came together to attack them. 

They were outnumbered still and it was a hard fight. The Paladins could not form Voltron and they struggled with the Lions. The blades were holding their ground and fought off the enemy from inside the ships.

They won after all, but if an alarm goes off sooner, they would have been all wiped out.

After the battle he went to see how they are doing, thankfully nobody dead and they already started to tend the injured. Good.

He left his family on the ship and headed to the bridge to speak with Voltron. 

"I don't  _ know! She was just rejecting me!  _ I don't know made her like this but she was not listening to me! I was completely shut out!" came an irritated voice from the bridge and Kolivan recognized the voice of the altean princess but the voice of the Red Paladin and the Black Paladin joined in.

"Allura, we planned this mission for so long, the Lions would not shut you out without a reason, what did you do?"

"What do you mean by that?! How can you ju..."

"Shiro, she felt it right, I felt it too! Red was distant too! She paid no attention to the fight, from the start she seemed... distracted... You can't blame Allura for it"

"Yeah... I felt it with Green too, but she was a lot more discreet about it. I think that's why we could not form Voltron... The Lions didn't want to...." a thoughtful comment from the Green Paladin made the room silent and Kolivan walked in without a second thought.

" Thankfully our numbers are full, and with a little more difficulty but we have the information you wanted to obtain, am I right Paladins? We should plan our actions for the future." with a strong voice, he chooses to end their discussion and start the meeting and after a tick the Paladins joined in, working on the upcoming events.

\---

After they were done, Kolivan went back to their ship before the Green Paladin could stop him and ask for her to see Leo. The preparations on going back to the base was already ongoing and Kolivan chose to go to the deck and save their information from this meeting. The Paladins have a lot of plans for the future and they shared it with Kolivan, so he can harmonize the two organization's missions.

From the window, he saw Coran coming in and Leo went to speak with him for a little, after some time they hugged and Leo came back, helping with the finishing touches for they depart. 

When everything was done and everybody was on board they started the engines and flew out of the castle's hangar, towards the second base for further briefing.

Leo was sitting in a corner, looking at his communication device. Kolivan could guess that he's speaking with the altean advisor right now. He looks tired from the fight but he is not really injured, he just smiles with a sad smile, completely obvious to the world outside his screen. 

Even like this, he looks strong, the muscles beneath the armor are visible and he has a strong air around him. The fur on his head ( or  _ hair _ as Leo calls it) is slicked back, it gives him a more mature image. 

He changed so much. 

He's nothing like the sad and scared boy who came to their base half a deca-phoeb before. He looks like a soldier now, the soldier that was in there before, it was just locked in among the Paladins. The soldier was not needed there.

But now, with the right care, it came out and showed perfectly what this man is capable of. 

Kolivan can see now, that the stars had a different path for him all along. It may be not easy, but if he chooses to stay back in the castle, he would have been crushed by now and a hero of the universe would be  _ dead _ .

Kolivan doesn't want to acknowledge it, but its time for Leo to walk his own path. 

He taught him everything he could to prepare him. He saw this little cub mature but keep his shine. Kolivan could now give his blessing to Leo. The base will be so empty without him, but he can't lock him up, nobody can. They would just hurt him and Kolivan could not stand the thought of hurting Leo. 

So Kolivan made up his mind, he will let Leo fight as he wants, where he wants and with he wants.

What happens now is on him.

And  _ only _ him.

Kolivan just wishes that he will be safe. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You remember my little hint from Lance? (That he's always found someone to talk to as he walks on the base)  
It's easy!  
Because every blade looks out at him, they're caring and when they see that he is lost, they show him the way :3 without hurting his pride. Can i give them all a hug and kiss for caring so much? :D
> 
> And Koli, bless you too :D and you too Regris. And you too guys whos reading this!!   
Did you like it? Leave a kudo/comment.   
I love to see what you think <3  
I have such a good spirit right now :D this much love warmed my heart and i'm happy that i can finally show you too!


	13. What's worth more than gold?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We are back with Lance!  
What is the first thing you do after a near death experience? SLEEP :D or is it just me? :P
> 
> We will now have emotions <3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo...maybe you guys saw my fight with the system...  
It deleted two chapter and put the second chapter in the place of the fourth... I tried to correct what i can but i think we are now short in a chapter... I don't have them outside here so i lost them. If any of you have the chapters could you send me them please? thank you!
> 
> I went trough the previous chapter and corrected what i can in the grammar :) They are better now <3
> 
> As for this chapter, i'm sorry it took this much time, i needed to work on a lot of projects for my uni.  
I hope you will like it, good reading <3

On the way back Lance was spacing out, only barely not drifting out to sleep. Everything finally slowed down and now the tiredness has finally cathed up to Lance.

The mission was a success and nobody died from their ranks. Everybody is alive and are working right now to get them home.

Lance was so relieved to see every face back on the ship when they gathered again. Some soft 'good job' here and there while they started to attend the injuries. Lance has his mask on (if somebody were to suddenly check-in) so he could only talk to them and touch them to easy the after-effects of the battle.

He did what he's the best. He took care of them and made them smile. It was not much but he was happy to do it for them. 

Kolivan came in for a little before he went to speak again with Voltron. It took some time and they were almost done with the preparations for the departure when he came back. He looked a little tired and had a scowl on his face, but recently he always has this face after a meeting with Voltron.

In the last minute Coran came by to see Lance and he was so happy to finally hug the old altean. He missed him so much and he could not let him go once they hugged. He missed the smiling moustache and the soft yet bright and strong eyes. His weird British accent and the weirdest stories he ever heard. Lance nearly cried as he hugged him but that would make Coran worry so he steeled himself and smiled from the bottom of his heart. After all, he was really happy to see his favourite uncle. 

They didn't talk much, there was no time for a long reunion but Lance knew it was not the last time they saw each other so he let go of the altean.

With a heavy heart, he bid goodbye to the ginger man and flew off with the Blade of Marmora. 

Back in the base they got time to heal and rest and Lance walked to his shared room to get some shut-eye, but he could not sleep right away. He has too many thoughts flying around in his head. About the mission, about Voltron, about his past and everything he fights against.

Somehow during the battle, not only Red but Blue too invaded his mind. Her voice was much quieter than before when Lance was the Blue Paladin but she spoke to him too. The two Lions made his work harder but the constant distraction helped him ignoring the Paladins. He could not think outside of the mission and the Lions. It made the mission so much easier, it was better to listen to the girls chatting than listening to the Paladins.

Lance asked why Blue made a connection with him again, after all this time, but she only made a purr in his mind for an answer. Lance could not even be angry at her at this, as she and Red started to speak at the same time, making him smile despite the circumstances he was in. It was not the first time that the Lions did not answer his questions and Lance was done with getting angry, after all, they're just giant cats, always doing what they want.

Now that his head is just his again, all the thoughts and questions flooded back, he has to much space to think about his ex-team and the mission with them. Something felt off. Pidge took more time for her hacking (she was slower in every way) and somehow they did move differently in the base when Lance saw them. Like their teamwork is not fully matured, they worked with a disconnect that he could see without the Paladin bond. He did not hear them talking because of his girls but he sometimes saw them in a corridor or he looked after them in the open and saw how badly they worked together.

Lance finds it weird but they could have a lot of things happening that makes them a little more... sloppy.

He saw in the last tick as Keith lost it and attacked a sentry before Lance got there. It has their back to the Paladins and Lance had plenty of time to take it out when the Red Paladin suddenly jumped. He could not stop him or shoot out the sentry before Keith triggered the automatic alarm.

Lance was angry, how could Keith do such a big, noob mistake? He knew which spot he needs to attack the sentry for the quick disengage but he ignored it and let his anger take the better of him. As the sentry's two half had slide to the floor, the alarm rang out and hell broke out. 

Thankfully they still succeed after that and nobody died, just little injuries that could heal in a movement. But it was such an unnecessary risk, they were lucky that nothing serious happened. It was like Keith transformed back to the Keith when they became Paladins, the emo kid who listens to nobody and only talks if you force him. And has a temper like nobody else's. 

Lance saw just a little of Hunk... How his he? Had Hunk episodes in after he left? Can they help him? Does Hunk find new alien food that he can bake from? Does it help of his anxiety? And Shiro's episodes?

How are they managing now? He hopes they are fine... He's sure that they are doing fine... together...

Tiredness finally took a hold on him and took Lance away from his worries to the blissful dreamland.

When his roommates came in and saw their little friend sleeping peacefully they tugged him in with a blanket and left him in peace, so this little human can get his strength back. 

\---

Lance woke up slowly, feeling the warmth around him and the comfortable and feathery pillow he has below his face. He slept like a log without dreaming and now he feels really good. When was the last time he slept this good? 

Slowly, really slowly stretching out he blinks his eyes open, looking around with a hazy expression. It's midday in the base so he is alone in the room right now.

It's not rare, in the base they're not sleeping at the same time very often. When somebody comes back from a mission, they usually go to sleep after reporting. If there is nothing else to do.

Lance most of the time wakes up alone, he learned fast that the galra needs less sleep than him, even the days on the base are different. Longer day times and much shorter night times. It was hard at first, but now he is accustomed to it. He just takes shorter breaks between activities and finishes his work earlier so he can go to sleep a little earlier and in the morning he sleeps a little in for the seven-eighth hours he needs. Now he's perfectly fine in the mornings and he can work without any problem, his skin gets the care it needs and thanks to his new muscles, he looks better than ever. Lance feels good in his body. 

While he stands up and takes off his last piece of Armour, he left it on himself before sleeping (he was too tired to care about them), Lance notices that he got a message on his communication device. A little purple light blinks repeatedly for a while now and it stops as he slowly picks up the device to take a look.

The message is from Koli, telling him to find him when Lance is ready. 

Ready? Well if it's ready then Lance can go to eat before he goes to the leader, right? Nice, he is starving right now.

After slipping on his space jeans and his space jacket (he got them from a space mall and after some light changes, they are perfect on him now), he goes to the cafeteria. He is not alone in there so he sits down with the others and finishes his breakfast while chatting with them. It was a funny conversation, it's always nice to listen to the blades stories. 

Now that he is ready he can start his search.

Kolivan was not in the cafeteria so he walks down to his room. Not there. The bridge. Not there. The training room. He is not there either but not to worry, off to the comm room...not there and this was the last room he could think of. 

Now that Lance is out of ideas he stops in the hallway, trying to find out where Kolivan might be. His feet are tapping on the floor as Lance tries to call forward the base's map in his head. 

"no... No... No... I looked there already... No... Why would he be there... Ah! The hangar!" Lance can't help but walk a little faster than needed. He was curious and when he walked in and saw the figure of Koli he ran there and jumped on the back of the leader with great momentum. 

" Found you! "he laughs happily and hugs Kolivan a little more, then letting go of him, Lance slips down on the floor again, smiling from ear to ear." got your message, what happened? " without missing a beat Lance switches to his serious tone, putting on his business mask. Looking at Kolivan's face to read his eyes about his worries but Kolivan smiles at him and shakes his head as an answer, calming down Lance's growing worry. 

"I was not hiding, but I'm glad you found me this fast." Kolivan chuckles softly "Your stealth improved, I didn't notice you coming from behind, good work Leo" Lance smiles at him, thanking his praise with his eyes "There is nothing wrong. On the contrary, I have good news for you. Come with me" Kolivan starts to walk and Lance follows him without question, wondering what happened if it's not bad news.

After walking through the hangar's main part they reach the secondary dock where the repairs are done and where the not used ships residing. 

At the sixth ship, Kolivan stops and Lance looks up. And his mouth drops.

It's his ship! The one he came with, the altean ship he took to fly here.

It looks different though.

It has dark colourings now and even the main body is different.

If you look at it really close, you can't tell it's an altean ship, but only if you personally saw before one. Lance only recognized it from its window. That's the only part left the same. Now his ship is slender like the ones the Blade uses but it still has the same size as before. It now looks like some normal ship that Lance saw before at the space malls. There is nothing suspicious about it from the outside so Lance can use it freely, he can go wherever he wants to. Cool.

Kolivan opened the ramp and they went in. Lance was more astonished than ever.

The interior design was fantastic!

The walls are dark blue, almost black with a soft white light and white switches. His ship inside looks like the night sky! It's so perfect that he can't close his mouth.

Somebody built a little cabin for him to sleep there and to store his belongings and the lower level has more beds for a future crew or the people he will help. There is a little kitchen where he can recycle almost everything and he has a lot of space for future needs.

Kolivan says that they didn't change too much the original design, the alteans made a good job with the ship so it was already ready for a crew to live in it, they just updated it with modern technology. Lance can see it, the ship is not much smaller than a Lion and while the Lions were made for one person, inside it was perfect for long missions and the Lion's inside was almost perfect for living. 

This ship was meant to use in a way Lance will use it. 

That's why he choose this one. In the library, he found a big stock of information about altean space crafts and space travel and after checking out the castle, he found that this type of ship was the best for him. 

But the Blades still upgraded it. And it's perfect!

They uploaded a map that will stay updated daily and he can even access the Blade of Marmora's channel for information and communication. The language is now galran because the altean will sell him out right away if somebody saw it, so they changed it. Lance learned it already so there is not a problem with it, but he will change everything to Spanish, or half Spanish when he has the time.

Kolivan showed him everything and they made sure that everything is functioning just alright before Kolivan came back to the room. 

Lance was still in there and looked at everything with starry eyes when it suddenly hit him. 

He looked at Kolivan with a heartbreaking expression and pale face. 

"You... You're sending me away?" he could not stop his voice from breaking as he looked at the tall alien. Who looked back at him with wide eyes and a confused frown.

"No! Stars, no... I'm not sending you away Leo" Kolivan steps closer to him and grabs his shoulder firmly with a gentle squeeze. "I'm showing you your ship because it's done and ready for your own missions. You're done and ready." Kolivan smiles at Lance "You did a great job, now you are ready to go fight, to write your own story and make the universe a better place to live in. I'm not sending you away, I'm just saying that when you want to, you can go wherever you want to. You completed your training Leo and you did an excellent job! With your human word... You graduated Leo, congratulations " Lance looks up at his eyes silently and smiles up at him with the most gentle expression he has" I saw in your eyes for a time now that you are eager to go and do something and I... We don't want to hold you back, we want to support you."

"Yeah...I am eager... I..." Lance can feel his tears coming forward but he collects his strength and smiles as wide as he can"Thank you Koli..." suddenly he hugs Kolivan tightly and presses his face in his chest, fighting against his tears. Kolivan is so firm and warm that he unconsciously rubs his face against his chest more. 

"No, I'm the grateful one. But you are not alone in this war, Leo. You have our communicator and our channel. You can always come back. And we will still ask for your assistance from time to time, and we will help you if you need it. Not only me, but we all also want you to stay in touch and come see us sometimes. You start your journey but it does not mean that you're left alone, you have the Blade of Marmora and the altean advisor young warrior" slowly Kolivan hugs him back gently and Lance looks up at him with a soft laugh. This hug worths more to him than his ship. 

" Of course I would come and bother you! How could I not see my favourite space ninjas again? If you let me, of course, I will come! I want to make sure my space family is safe too!" 

" We would be glad Leo. " he releases Lance and smiles at him "You need to be careful Leo. Space is vast and cruel, you will need to always be on your guard, don't let it swallow you, you need to fight, not just against the Empire. But you will do good, you're strong, I know you have the strength to face anything that stands in your way.

With our channel you have access to our information too, you can see where is a need for some help and you can alert us that you will take that mission. You learned everything you need to find innocents in need but you can always ask us. If you're not sure about some details, before you go in, contact us and it will work out. You are a warrior from the bottom. Of your heart, we all are proud that we know you, Leo." Kolivan starts to walk out from the ship and Lance follows him, murmuring a soft 'thank you' in a daze. 

"I...i need to get ready... And I need to say goodbye to everybody... It's good if I only leave after tomorrow?"

Kolivan pats him on the shoulder "You can stay as long as you want. I'm not kicking you out Leo." after another reassuring pat, Kolivan leaves Lance alone in the hangar, he needs to attend a meeting so he lets Lance to his thoughts. And Lance is thankful for it because he needs some time to organize his thoughts before he can function again. 

He can't believe it... He is ready to fight on his own? He trained hard and studied as much as he can and Kolivan says it worth it? He... Kolivan thinks that he can go now and fight without needing help...Kolivan is proud of him... 

"what..." his vision became blurry and as he wipes his eyes Lance found tears on his fingers, looks like he lost against his tears. 

'Why does it feel so good to have his trust?' his chest feels so warm and he can't stop his tears coming as Kolivan's words settle down in his mind. He has somebody who really thinks he can do this...He has somebody who cares about him deeply out here.

He is not alone.

'Thank you Koli...' looking out from the hangar, Lance watches the stars while his emotions calm down. 

Thankfully it didn't take long for him and in his ship's control room, Lance makes his plan for his next step.

For now, he needs to pack his things and then say goodbye to everybody. It will be lonely without them but he will see them again, he can see them whenever he wants. 

Everything will be fine. He worked for this after all. He can do this. 

With strong resolve, he walks out of the hangar.

He walks towards his future.

\---

When he told Regris about his decision to depart the next quintant, his friend gave him a sad smile, saying that Lance needs to come to see him a lot and that he needs to send him messages every quintant or he will personally hunt down Lance. Regris only supported him and they worked out some details of Lance plan. With Regris' help, Lance once again saw his future brighter. 

After that, Regris gave a warm hug to the slender human and Lance was thankful for his support, he tightly hugged back and poured his heart into it, telling everything that words can't.

He could feel Regris' trust in him, he never questioned if Lance is ready or not to go. Regris knew he was ready and he wished him good fortune. 

It was the same as everybody else. They all gave him a hug and some heartening words before giving a small kiss on Lance's forehead. It was the blades' way of showing him their good wishes.

Dhalnok even gave him a little gift when Lance visited the galran instructor.

It was a pair of gauntlets. They are strengthened with metal and if Lance bumped his fist together, then metal claws came out from the fingers, just like the claws of the blades.

'_ You humans have no fangs or claws to fight, so if you are short of weapons, you can use your new claws to fight. You're snappy enough so there will be no problems' _

Dhalnok laughed while hitting Lance so hard in the back that he almost fell forward. But Lance held his ground and thanked him. 

It was a gift for taking lives, but Lance still loved it with his all.

After he did everything he wanted, he took off.

He needed to go, the more he was in the base, with them, the more difficult it became to say goodbye. Lance loved his space family.

And with their love and all these gifts, how could he not fight for them and the universe with his all?

\---

He was out alone in the vast universe, ready to fight but first, he needed to learn the way around with his new ship. He needed to learn how to operate it. 

He made little changes for the better compatibility and he even made a voice command set, in Spanish, so only he could do some specific things with his ship. He programmed some settings that made his work alone easier and even uploaded songs. They were the songs he has on his phone when they all came to space, Pidge saved everything from their phones to the devices they used and Lance, of course, took it when he left. The songs are still cool and if somebody tries to hack in, then one of his favourite songs alerts. 

Lance loves to think about it like some cool theft-proof protocol.

After he was satisfied with everything, he started to look for work. At first, he used the Blade of Marmora's channel, but after some time Lance started to build up his own system. It was hard and it took a lot of work but Lance was determined to make it work. 

The very first mission in his solo career was a simple information gathering for the rebels.

Everything was fine... Until he made a little mistake and he got the ship's full personnel after him, all shooting and slashing at him. It was a _ little _bad but he got the information, blew up the ship and got away with only a scratch, delivered the information AND learned.

After that he went for all kind of missions, he made some mistakes and learned how to do things alone, how to look out for everything and how blew up a galra ship in the most effective way. How to fight without somebody looking out for him. 

And he did it all with style.

He is Alejandro 'Lance' McClain after all and a McClain does everything with style. _Oh... His sister would be so proud to see him now. Furious for leaving without a word, but proud to see him like this. _

He missed his family every quintant, so he worked harder and harder, so he can see them one day again. After the war is over. 

And in between training and missions, he talked to Coran, to Kolivan and Regris. He meets up with the Blade of Marmora here and there and constantly reported to Kolivan. He sent his letters to Regris and Coran, keeping up with everything that's happening and he cheered them up when needed. 

When they asked he went to missions together with the blades and he even helped out the rebels a couple of times. Once he and Coran had a meeting in a space mall and he even made some work for the old altean. 

He made good use of his ship's empty spaces. Lance often helped freed prisoners reaching their home. He healed their injuries the best he could and stored resources for supply missions. He gave them a bed to sleep and food while they were under his wing. Some asked his name but he always just smiled and told them to call him whatever they wanted, his name is not important. He didn't want the Empire to know that he is Lance and the nickname Leo is something he wants only his close friends to use. So he remained nameless. 

Lance got injured sometimes, but never bad enough to get him off his feet. A stab in the arm, some broken ribs from a hard explosion, a laser burn in his left thigh from a nasty fight, after some time they all healed and he was good as new. Only his new scars remained to be reminders about his mistakes and victories. 

He was so busy for three phoeb after he left the Marmora base, that he had barely time for sleeping and doing his personal rounds. His skincare was his way to relax, but he could not do it daily, but it was good like that because Lance did good in his new life and he was satisfied. When he looked at the mirror, he always thought that he looks like his dad and now with all the changes, he really is just like his father in his twenties. 

He didn't have a crew, but thanks for all his friends, he could work with his quiet ship. He listened to his songs when the quiet became unbearable but maybe this was for the better. 

Lance thought that was it, this is how he will fight until the war ends. In solo, sometimes helping out bigger teams, like a mercenary. He became a quiznacking _space_ mercenary. How cool is that? 

He thought that after three phoeb, everything is going to stay this way. Lance was ready to accept that he will live a quiet life in this war with his. He is not alone, but he is lonely a lot. But he was ready to accept it and be a lonesome fighter. 

Until everything changed.

It was a normal rescue mission like the dozen he already did. He had killed some galrans and destroyed some robots and was ready to take home the scared aliens. 

Yet everything changed after this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That was our next step? Yes it was!  
Please tell me if you see some mistake (⌒_⌒;)  
Did you like it? Tell me about it <3 Your kudos and comments brightens my day ^///^
> 
> See you next time :*


	14. The unexpected journey

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes life is unexpected.  
Sometimes you can meet somebody who will change your life if you wanted to.
> 
> Will you take the opportunity?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Today's mc is a nice lady from the planet Uraikin. She is just a nice lady, I hope you will like her^^  
Her race has a different tongue like humans so they speak differently, more grunts and dying sounds :D It's hard for us humans to speak their language but after some hard work Lance will learn it and here is how he learnt to pronounce some of the words.
> 
> Queezgahriuntn-Qészghriancn  
Qeez-Qész  
Maigrughinkhiet-Mákhrugégjét
> 
> Really, don't try to hard to speak I up, to us, they are more like grunts and spits, our tongue can't move the way theirs do
> 
> I hope you will enjoy it^^

She woke up in the cell with a soft gasp. Her entire body hurt and she could not move her left arm. The tentacles on her head that were cut down are still hurting and burning, she could not move them as freely as possible because of the pain of every little movement. Through all this pain she can still think clearly, the druids could not rob her from her will. She never gave up to despair and always fought for her freedom. As her mind clears up from the dream mist, there is one thing she could not hide from.

Today is the day she will die. 

She spent ten or so deca-phoebs in the galra prisons. At first, she was only a worker in a mine on a Balmera, mining the crystals out of the poor creature and watching how everybody around her gave up and died. She spent every varga in pain too, she came from a peaceful planet with a fragile body just like everybody else but she never let the Empire break her. And she was alive till today. She is alive and she never gave up. 

But for the last two deca-phoebs, the druids took her in their care and it was not a vacation. 

The druids are ruthless and cruel. The only thing they care about is their experiments and every unlucky fool who got here is their tool.

She spent so much time in the laboratories that sometimes she lost herself, lost consciousness trough the session and only when she was lying down on the metal floor could she come back, not always remembering what happened. It was hard, to not lose her mind, but she is still sane and her mind is strong, this is not something common on this ship.

She never gave up her hope. 

But now she reached her end, there is nothing she could do to stop today events from happening. Yesterday during her time on the metal table, she heard two druids talking about the experiment she's in. Mostly it was the usual sickening talk, discussion about possibilities and the usage of her parts, but then something caught her attention, they have every data they needed from her and after the next experiment, she's done for. 

It means she is without any purpose now, there is nothing more they could take so they don't need her anymore. 

It means she will die, just like the others who never came back to the cell. Just disposable subjects.

She spent two vargas after she woke up in the cell, possibly the longest two vargas in her life. As usual, she helped the other prisoners with their injuries, her body lotion can disinfect injuries and speed up the recovery, she always helped them like that and after she was done with them, she caressed her own too. Her cut of tentacles will never be whole again, but at least the burning pain could be stopped. It was a little hard because her left hand was broken so she could not move it freely, but with her right hand and unharmed tentacles, she did fix what she can, but the lack of quintessence in her body was the biggest problem. She was tired and cold, she was struggling and her mind was slow, her body was heavy and hard, she could not feel her usual mist-like state where it should be.

At the end of the two vargas, she heard the door sliding open and the familiar sounds of the steps of the sentries. They always come at the same time, every quintant and take away two of them. After some time they found out the order, so now it's not a surprise of the choice of who they take.

The cell's door opened and as she thought, they ordered for her and another one, it looks like today only one will come back, the numbers getting cut down from time to time.

She slowly stood up and was almost out, one of the sentries are holding out the handcuffs towards her when suddenly a shadow appeared and jumped at the closer one. The only sound came from the destroyed robot as it dropped to the ground, sliced in two, and letting the other one aware of the intruder's appearance.

The other sentry attacked the shadow...no, it's not a shadow. It's a dark armoured alien with two blades. It was already ready for the attack and jumped back without any hesitation and avoided the sentry's attack with swift movements, it leant back and as its two limbs touched the floor, the other two shoot up and disarmed the sentry with a quick attack. It only took to the alien five ticks to disable the robot. It sliced this one in two too and took its arm.

After that, the slender warrior opened the other cell, using the scanner and spoke to the prisoners with a warm voice.

"Don't worry, I'm here to help. If you want, come with me, I can take you home, but please choose fast, we need to hurry before they swarm here and cut off our escape route." it says and walks down to the door, leaving them to choose what they want.

From its voice it seems their saviour is a young male, it speaks the common language but with a clear accent so she is _not_ galra and has a warm tone even as he is urging them, he seems trustworthy so she follows after him after a quick glance around.

From the others looks, they came too to this conclusion and they all followed the young fighter through the ship, towards freedom. As they walk, she takes another check upon him. He has four limbs, he walks on two (but could on four too) and he doesn't have any visible uniqueness, no tail, no claws, no skin is showed off, only his dark armour, so she could not even guess his species. But it doesn't matter, what matters now that he is willing to help them and nothing else.

He soundlessly, without great effort and mercy fought off anyone who came up against them on the way, thankfully, they didn't meet a druid. It was breathtaking, watching him doing all this, he fought in such a professional way, he is not a beginner for sure, but where did somebody like him came from? He sounded young but he fought like an older, seasoned soldier. 

When they finally reached the ship, he showed them a room to wait in, it has beds, chairs and blankets in it, and he disappeared through a door. Not long after that, the shop came to life and they could feel the ship moving away from the druid base.

Now there was nothing they could do. She quieted down the others, some were so frightened that they could not even move from a spot and after that, looked around in the room. There are some free beds, most of them seem unused for a long time, looks like there is nobody to use them beside them, so this little group and the crew who rescued them is here. She was speechless as she gazed here and there, beside her, the others were just like that too.

The ship is just too beautiful in the inside, nothing that they imagined. The walls look like the sky from her home, dark, almost black blue and everything has a laid back style. There are panel doors on them and light coming out here and there. From here, four doors are leading to somewhere and some doors only hide a cabinet our resources. The technology is a little weird but modern, she never saw something like this before, somehow it all looked different than the common galra tech, it looks somehow..._regal_.

She saw some doors leading to other premises, those bear lettering, but they were locked and when she tried they did not open so she gave up and sat down on one of the empty beds. Now there is nothing more she could do, she can get some rest instead of unnecessary worries so she let her head sink in the pillow. It was so comfortable after the cell floor for deca-phoebs. 

It seems true. She's alive. 

And she's out of that hell hole. It's so incredible, she always hoped this to happen but never once saw the opportunity to do it. She heard rumours of Voltron and everybody hoped that they will come and rescue them, but she never believed it. And now thanks to this stranger, she was free. He took her hand and give her hope back, hope to _truly _live again. 

She was free. 

She was alive.

She was still injured and hurt, but she avoided her death today, those injuries can heal with time and now she has time again. She can live for another quintant.

It was so long when she could be so sure of this like now. And this all thanks to this young soldier. A soldier who has a lot of weird things going around.

\---

She didn't even notice when she drifted off to sleep but at the sound of footsteps on the metal floor and the door sliding shut, she woke up and looked at the dark figure of their saviour. He came in in a relaxed way and after stopping in the middle of the room, beside a table, he looked around. His stance seemed much more friendlier and the air around him is different now before he has a really strong, intimidating air but now it's warm and calm. As she observed him, she saw him looking at her, she felt like their eyes met but she could only see the red and blue light on his helmet. He is not wearing the hood now so the helmet is the only thing displaying, he is even unarmed, right now, his body shape is clear. He is slender with long limbs but smaller than the galra with a head or two (still taller than her), but he does not look weak. Or she thinks like this because she saw her fight before? It's hard to tell... 

As she was looking at him, the warrior slowly took off his helmet and smiled. 

It was a wonderful smile.

The... The boy looked young. Maybe eighteen deca-phoeb old? 

She could not name his species (at all) but he has two blue eyes (the colour resembled her home planet's moon), he has brown skin and short fur on his head and little ears and they're round! Now it's clear that he is not a half-galra. From his smile it looks like he does not have fangs, nor does he have any visible characteristics that the species have he resembles. There is nothing at all. She never saw somebody like him before. 

But this young saviour has such a calming aura as he looks at them with that smile on his face. As his eyes shining and his smile warms them up, he holds their attention on him without even trying. He is radiant, without a word, they can feel the kindness and goodwill from him. He looks at them like they were old friends when was the last time she saw somebody smile at her with kindness?

The room feels so warm with him in now, he is the centre of the room, a beacon of light to their injured souls. 

It's such a big contrast against the shadow warrior who killed his enemies without mercy and helped them escape. How could such a brightness hide in the shadows? How can he smile like this in this war? How does this young boy fight like the most experienced warriors in war and then? What did he endure to be like this? How can he be so strong? Why is he such a mystery? 

The questions' growing number makes her more and more irritated. She wants to get answers now. 

"We're now safe, the galra lost our tail and no matter how they try, they can't find us anymore." the boy's voice is still so calming and warm. He took out a holo map from his pocket, turned it on and placed it on the table "I can help you reach your home personally or I can take you to the rebels. If you have a place you can go, I can take you there so I would like to know what you want to do so I can plan our route" he won over these scared aliens' trust almost instantly and with and she listened as everybody took turns of speaking, the boy listened to them and helped figure out the better way for everybody. She observed how the boy listened to them and marked the planets on the map, not breaking his smile even once, his friendly demeanour erased the anxiety from their hearts and she saw something that amazed her. He did not only smiled with his lips, but his eyes were also smiling too, he was sincere the whole time. When she was the last one left, he turned to her and those blue eyes looked deep in her, but she could not say anything, she didn't want to go home. Nor does she have a place to go now. 

"What's your name? I want to thank you" she tells him instead but the boy only smiles again, but this one is a fake smile. This has something... _sad _in it.

"My name is not important, you can call me however you want. I'm just a nobody now. Just a nobody who has the power to help, it's not necessary to remember me. Nor do you need to thank me, I'm only doing what I should." so he can't or don't want to reveal his name, could he be a criminal? No, nobody has such bright eyes in that business. But he is certainly somebody... Or was somebody but he needed to start a new life. But as he said it... it's like he doesn't have the slightest self-esteem. It's not good, but it's not a thing she has a word with.

So she's concentrating on the first part, she can name him. There is a good name she thought of, let's call him Qeez. Queezariunn is the name of the God who takes the died souls back to the circle, he makes sure that the balance between the sides is undisturbed, he is a God who is greatly respected among her people. His servants are named Qeez. Qeez looked like them when he first appeared, as he dived on the enemy, so this will be a good nickname for the boy who took her died soul back and saved her life. 

"I don't know where I want to go yet. I think about it until you take everybody to their destination. I figure it out meanwhile. " she looks at him and Qeez smiles at her without any hesitation. 

"Okay, no problem, you can think as long as you need, don't fret over it." he smiles brightly, so willing to give her the time she needs... "Now, I have some first aid here that you all could use, sorry that I can't help out more with your wounds. And you need to get your strength back, you can get some goo from there" he points at a door, the one that leads to the kitchen" it looks a little weird but there is nothing wrong with its taste" he laughs softly and puts away the map "you can sleep here, rest and if you need everything, knock at that door" he points at the one he just came in" you don't need to care about anything besides your healing, just rest and get better, I handle everything else" he smiles again and goes through with light steps, the door slides shut being him, leaving them a little stunned. He has a lot of energy. And has his own space, they could only listen to him. 

"You think...he really will take us home?" a broken voice sounds, barely audible in the quiet room. She looks away from the door and nods at them without doubt. 

"Yes, I think Qeez is trustworthy. He wants to help us, he was sincere the whole time and did nothing but care for us" she smiles at the others. "and he is right, for now, let's rest and eat, we all need it."

"Yes, the uraikinen is right, for now just take care of ourselves." a four-armed alien stands up and goes through the door to the room where the food is. He did this without looking back and thanks to him, the atmosphere in the room broke, everybody sprung to action. 

She watched the other aliens going for food or getting comfortable on the beds and she did lay down too on her bed. If Qeez's ship is like her race's, then their little trip going to last for two movements, she has time for getting to know the mysterious boy. Right now her body is still weak, it would be the best to rest first before anything else. 

After a good sleep, she got up and treated her wounds as much as she can then walked around a little, admiring the walls and inspecting them. Her body is stronger now that she have her injuries treated and now she feels better too. Her body is lighter and her feet are carrying her without a problem. The magic of a bed after deca-phoebs of the cold floor. 

Some of her co-passengers are still asleep, some are in the kitchen, enjoying a meal and slightly conversing in hushed tones, the light is dim and she can see some blankets that were not there before. While she was asleep, somebody made sure that they are comfortable. 

Their saviour is such a gentleman, she can't help but chuckle a little.

Talking about their saviour.

He must be on the other side of the door as he said he would. He said they could go to him if they need him and she needs him. To satisfy her curiosity.

She slowly walks to the door and... It opens! He really left it open, how kind! This gives her the perfect chance to sneak a glance at Qeez and the crew. 

The first room she got in after going through the door, was just the lower deck, where they came in, there is nothing much in, just some plus equipment and clothes. Nothing could be found from it, disappointing. She walks through, towards another door, where Qeez is most likely is. 

Well, she hopes she's heading there. But she can always search more if her guess is wrong. 

When she's finally close, she can hear his voice, talking to somebody. So there _are_ more personnel on the ship? She started to doubt as there were no signs of them but it would be impossible for a petite alien, like Qeez to manage everything on board. This ship is definitely not made for one person. 

When she reaches the door, sneaks a peek in, finding the cockpit. But in contrast to her expectations, she finds only the boy there, talking to a communicator beside him as he pilots. Screens are popping out and down as he reads them, sometimes wringing something before closing them. He is working alone? In the short time she watches, he's already done three people's share... He doesn't even have a second pilot to trust them with the navigating and reporting. While he looks accustomed to it, it's slower than with a crew. And a lot more dangerous too! 

"Yeah, I got it, I can do this gathering after the... second planet, its name is Wirendbdu, I got two passengers who want to go there so go get what you need after I'm done there. " his voice is stern but it still has a light undertone, she can't grasp what it is. 

"That's good, the planet is close to the base we need now, be careful, they have a good surveillance system, don't get caught, we can't let them know we know about their plans. After you have the data, meet up with Thrix and hand it to her, she will wait for you. She will send you the coordinates later." a calm but cheerful voice sounds from the other side of the channel. A voice speaking the common tongue with a galra accent, it just makes her more curious about Qeez. 

"Roger that, I'm nearing to the first planet so I need to go now. We can talk later, bye Reg"

"Haha, we better or you know I will hunt you down. Don't get your ass handled in the meantime" there is a laugh from the other side of the line and the boy says some words (she doesn't understand them, but they didn't seem very nice from his tone). The laugh disappears as a soft buzz signals the end of the call and the cockpit became silent. She waits for a little before knocking on the metal doorframe. 

"Qeez, can I talk to you now?" her voice is still a little distorted but better than yesterday, the pain of screaming is starting to dull too.

After her question, Qeez looks back at her with a confused look. As they look at each other's eyes, he murmurs to himself a word. 

"Qeez?..." suddenly his eyes start to sparkle and he brights up, letting a smile form "Oh, that's me, isn't? Yeah... No, sorry I know I told that you come whenever but I need to land us safely and talk to the locals. If it's nothing life-threatening after we are on route again, I'm happy to talk" after hearing it, she can sigh in relief, she was nervous there for a bit when he rejected but it's simply bad timing. 

"Yes, that would be good. Thank you..." she almost turns away but suddenly halts her movements "Do you need assistance in landing? I didn't see a crew on board and you must be tired." she sees sadness and... longing in his eyes for a tick at the word 'crew' but he hides it so perfectly almost instantly that it's hard to tell that it was even there. But she is sure now, he doesn't have a crew, he is doing everything alone. But he's not happy about it. 

"Maybe another time, you're hurt and tired, but I'm good thank you for your concern. I do this for a time now, don't worry. Get some rest and concentrate on your healing, that would be the best help for me" he smiles again, such a warm smile are directed towards her that she could not press it more. Not now at least. 

It feels like he really is concerned about her well-being and she can't argue with him, she really is hurt and tired so after a nod, she walks back to her bed. 

As she falls asleep once more, she could not shake off the desire to help this boy. 

\---

She took some time to approach him again. 

She took her rest until they almost reached the second planet. And she is ready to approach him, there is nothing that could stop her from getting her answers. 

Now she feels a lot better, her arm is still healing but it doesn't hurt anymore (if she is careful with moving it) and she can walk normally again. The fire in her cut off tentacles are died down, only a numb feeling follows after moving them. Her system was always fast with self-recovery but was always stopped by the next experiment. Now that she had time, it could work as it supposed to be and her recovery was almost done. She will be never like before, the scars and marks on her body will stay with her forever but it's a small price for her freedom. 

She walks to the door of the cockpit and looks in. Qeez is sitting at the control panel like last time, but instead of talking with the friendly voice, he's now working on a... long-distance scanner?

She saw one before, back home her people used it to identify lost dwellers and upcoming storms. It helped them avoid too dangerous situations. It's a really useful tool if one uses it wisely but why does Qeer need one?

"Qeez, can I come in? I came to talk" she walks in without waiting for his reply and looks at the device closely "if you want it to not burn out after the first scan, I suggest you plug together the gamma and zeltoid cables and remove the unnecessary third key from here. It would be easier in the future if you change out this part for a little less complicated chip, makes faster the processing." she tells him in a calm voice, just like when she teaches the younger ones. But she is surprised that she still remembers it. It came out so naturally... 

As Qeez looks at her, he's just as taken aback as her but after a tick, he starts to do what she said just now. Not even questioning why she came in without consent or how she knows it. Isn't he too trusting? 

"The gamma... Always the gamma... Nice one La...how did you forget it..." his grumping don't stops as he works and she steps back and looks out the window while waiting for him to finish, the stars are beautiful today too, so calming and warm, never darkened by the world's cruelties... But they're so cold too, never bothering with other's pain... "Thanks... I think this thing will work now." he puts away the device and looks at her "You came to talk? Perfect timing, want some goo bars? No? Okay, then I just serve myself out. Man, these things are so weird, how does that goo stay in this form? I never want to know it." and he's as cheery as before. She could not answer his question so she blinks a little taken aback and watches him take out a 'goo bar' and starts to eat it, waiting for her to say something. After a tick, she pulls herself together and nods several times, grounding herself. 

"Yes... I'm wondering about... You... For instance, why did you rescue us? Who are you? Why are you helping us this much? He do you know all this stuff? What's up with this ship? There are things so weird here... Where did you get it?" the tip of the iceberg, but this the most important question right now. She just wants to know why this stranger helped her and she accidentally pours out more than she wanted to for the first time. As she looks seriously at Qeez, he just munches on his bar and smiles at her. His eyes are still smiling, but she can't read anything out of his expression. He got guarded? 

"I'm just nobody. Just a guy who has the strength to help others so he does. I'm just doing what I should and help those who I came across. It was a coincidence that got to your prison, but I'm happy that I could save you. There is nothing more to it. I'm just doing what I can with what I have." he smiles at her but she can't accept it. Nobody? How can somebody so kind and strong be nobody? How could some nobody have a ship like this? This is not ordinary technology, and who was he talking too? 

"No... You can't be just... Just nobody" she shakes her head but he smiles at her. But it's a smile with a little sadness in it.

"But it's the truth, I'm just a nobody now who can't help but take those's hands who needs it. As for why I helped you guys? It was just luck? There are so many innocents in galra captivity, but there is only one of me. I just help who I can, and you were the one I got across. "that's acceptable but it's almost the same he told her just before. 

And there it is again. That one word she can't shake off. 'Now'. So he _was_ someone before, he just started a different episode in his life. Or a new life. And this ship is a connection to his old life! What kind of life did he have? She wants to ask more but Qeez starts before she can.

" How did you know how to build the scanner?"

"It's nothing really, just on my home planet, a device like this is commonly used. So most of us know how to use, operate and repair it." great, she missed her chance to push for more information. 

"Your home planet?" his eyes are brighter than before and he looks like a young boy as his interest is piqued so she can't help but smile and nod. 

"Yes, my planet, Uraikin. It's a beautiful place, but harsh to those who live there." she smiles and at the boy's pleading eyes, she starts to speak again. "Uraikin is a planet led by the most fiercer storms and winds. You can hardly find land there, but ice. Our people live in the sky, we catch the thunder for power and fly where the wind wants to take us... There are different tribes, some of us lives in the ice, building caves and castles in safety away from the winds but we build ships. Ships that are like castles, it houses families and we all work together for a living, enjoying the winds in the sky... " as she speaks she forgot everything she wanted to say and just tells the wonders of her home to the shining eyed boy.

A sudden beep stops her in the middle of her tale and Qeez instantly zones in the screen that popped up. She blinks some to come back to reality. She lost her perfect opportunity! 

" Sorry... We need to stop now, we're nearing the planet and I need to prepare for landing..." he looks back at her "but Uraikin seems interesting, I would like to hear more if you want to share" he smiles at her and she smiles back. It was a good time for her. 

It's disappointing that she forgot why she came in the first place and got carried away, but Qeez is a good listener and her heart warmed from the fond memories of her home. She would like to share more with him. But he is right, it's not the time for it. 

The chatting time may be over, but there is still one more thing she wants to do. 

"I asked last time, but do you need help? It was a long time ago that I last piloted a ship but I still know some tricks...It would be better than doing it alone."

Qeez's hands stop and she watches him without blinking. Hoping that he would lean on her a little. 

Slowly he looks up at her and nods towards the second command's chair. His face is unreadable again, just what does he think? 

"Okay... If you really want to, let's try it." he looks back at his screens" just take it slowly and ask if you need, I can handle most of the work's so you don't need to strain yourself with the parts you don't understand " he smiles and she sits down a little dazed. He agreed!!

He is a little too trusting!

What would happen if she were somebody who wants to harm him? Obviously, she doesn't want to harm him, but anything can happen! What would he do if somebody were to stab him in the back after trusting them without a second thought? 

Khm, anyway, she needs to familiarize herself with the way he commands the ship. It can't be that different from what she knows. 

Pulling up the screens, she starts to read trough but stops at the second part.

The first part was in the common language, she had no difficulty with it but the second part is in a language she never saw before. She can't understand anything at all! Why are there two different languages mixed in? 

And the data's 80% is in the unknown language. 

Now she can understand why he let her so easily in. She couldn't do anything even if she wanted to.

As she looked at him, she summarized what she learned so far. 

He is kind, strong, caring and a trickster. He looks weak, but he is strong. He is trusting, but only to a degree. And watching his upcurled lips, he likes to make pranks. 

As she's thinking about ways to discipline this little youngster, Qeez suddenly calls out. 

"Oh yeah, you call me Qeez but how can I call you? It would be rude of me to always use 'you' "

"My name is Maigrughinkhiet" she says with a soft smile, it was so long that someone asked for her name. She was happy to share it with him. 

"Maig...marhh....sjet..."Qeez is trying to say out her name but his tongue always slips. She can't help but laugh inside at his embarrassed face. His face became a shade darker and pinker. What is this? " Okay. Sorry, but I can't say out your name... What if I call you in a nickname? "

" Nickname? I don't have one" she shakes her head and he smiles at her like he just waited for this moment. 

"Then what about... Mag? Or Mars? Or... MG?" she listens but only one is to her liking so the choice is easy. 

"I like MG" she smiles, somehow it feels good to have a nickname, even if it because her name is too hard for Qeez. It still feels like they are closer now. 

"Cool! Then let's do our best MG!" he smiles and they start to prepare for the landing. 

Well, she doesn't have much work as she can't understand Qeez's language. As she sits there and tries to make out some sense of the unfamiliar words, she misses the small smile on Qeez's face. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And the first part of welcoming our new character is done^^  
I'm sorry it took so long but it got at least longer than the others :DD  
What do you think? Share it with me! 
> 
> I have a good drawing from MG so I will share it next time :)


	15. Let's see 2.0

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As promised. Here is MG.  
And I'm really happy that you guys have a positive view of her <3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And I could not wait to post this after the next chapter so there is a slight spoiler(?). But I think nothing you didn't know or figured it out.   
If you feel more comfortable, then read this after the next chapter :D 
> 
> I hope you will like her.

Don't get fooled by her look. She is older than Lance, in Earth years, she is around 30-35. Even she doesn't know it sure because of her time in the galra prison.

Now some things about her.

Her blood is purplish-blue. The uraikin people have lighter bodies and they have lesser consistency. If the settings are right, their body could turn smoke-like, but don't worry, not on a big scale, usually just their fingertips and the tentacles' ends.

And there is a custom that they never forget.

At times, when there is something exceptional happened, they receive a ring (different sizes). These rings could be worn everywhere on their body and all have a different meaning. the bigger the deed, the bigger the ring is.

When MG became a slave in the Empire, she lost all her rings so when she met with Lance, she didn't wear any. But her first rings' did not grow with her body so they left marks on her, Lance once asked about them and after that, she told her about the rings.

After this, Lance started to give her rings from time to time. They were not from the material the original rings are made from, but they were all valued by MG. There was a ring from wood, a wood that is found on the planet they first worked on. Or there was a silver ring, made from the first blade she had, it broke in one of the missions. There was a ring braided from grass, the first time she saw grass. 

All her rings were made by Lance, some were rough, some were better but she loved them the same, they were made from the memories she had and in the same time they reminded her of home.

Once, she found a ring on a swap moon. It was a ring made from flackernoin. The stone of her home. It was a ring from her home.

She bought it instantly and back on the ship, she gave it to Lance. He wears it on his left hand's little finger. She needed to persuade him a little to wear it when he heard that it's an original ring but she succeed. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's for the little MG time. Everything else will be known from future chapters.
> 
> What do you think? Share with me <3


	16. Some important lessons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In war, some could not choose what happens to them.  
If it's something good or bad, they need to make out the most of it. 
> 
> How does MG adapt to her new life?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made a quick counting before this chapter.  
At the end of the last chapter, Lance was away from Voltron for a close year :D  
Go, Lance, go <3  
Oh, how fast they grew up :'3
> 
> Enjoy <3

The mission he went on started just like the others. He found a lead, sought out every information he could about the galra base

and prepared for the mission.

When he intruded the ship, it was clear that this base was a secret druid laboratory.

Unfortunately, he found some before so this was not too much of a shock for him. But it still made him sad and angry at the same time. How can they treat people like this? He gets more sick of the Empire with every quintant. 

  
He can't let them do what they pleased like this, so he runs down the corridor without stopping and he searched for the prisoners through and through.

After some time, he finally found them.   
He got rid of the two sentries that were there, spoke a little to the prisoners and the quickly left that sick place. He learned the hard way to never stay too long in one place and not let the druids found him.

Thankfully everybody followed him without too much of a hassle and they were at the ship in a blink of an eye. They did not run into anything strong, like a druid and Lance was thankful for this luck. It's always better to avoid trouble.

He leads them to the guest room. He liked to call the room with the most beds and biggest space the guest room because he always lodges the 'guests' there. Lance needs to get away from the base, the farther the better.

After he successfully got away from their radar and manoeuvred the ship to a safe zone, he was ready to talk to his new passengers. 

So he went to pay them a visit and solve some problems, like where to go from here. Some very important problems.

As he walked in and looked at them, there was only one word he felt right.

Unique.

  
They were very unique. 

  
As he took in the look of the aliens, he has a hunch about what this laboratory worked on. Something like extracting every possible information from as much different race as they can get their dirty hands on. With that information, creating something that could do more harm than ever to the universe.   
Sadly, that's what they always do, but it's not important now. He helped them get out of there and now they are safe. 

But he will still need to report this to Kolivan. There are more and more secret laboratories like this. Whatever they are planning could not be good for the others, Lance just hopes there will be no more surprise laboratories like these in the future.

This was already the third he found, by pure luck no more. According to the information he collected, it was no more than an outpost for the soldiers. And jet he found this. And this is nothing good.

That's aside, among the rare looking aliens, there was one that gave him the chills when he first saw them.  
It's not like he is somebody who is influenced by the other's look (at least, not anymore) but they looked extreme with a human point of view. He felt remorseful for even getting scared at first sight, they doesn't deserve it, they are just some innocent alien who got abused by the Empire, they only deserve kindness and warmth.  
If he looked closely at their body, it looks like the alien is a woman. Or something similar, it's always hard to tell with the differences between races, but let's go with 'her' until he learns otherwise.

She is wearing the usual galra prison uniform but he still can see some details. She has blue skin, long fingers that look like claws.

Her feet look like that too, but at the same time, somehow...faint. (_He went crazy finally?_)  
She has a short tail, it's just a simple furless or anything-less tail, nothing like Regris'.

And she has two horns, they look like horns but at the same time, they are different too, they are growing out of her forehead. 

She doesn't have any fur or hair but she still has hair-like...tentacles (??) coming out of her head, constantly moving. Some look like if they were cut down, those are only jerking from time to time.   
She has a lot of injuries, she must be in pain.

It's hard to understand from one look, but there are clear signs of it.

Still, it wasn't the injuries that were too extreme for him. What put off him for a tick was hear head. Or more like her face.

She is not hideous. No, not at all.   
But her head looks similar to a human skull. Thankfully just similar and only at the upper part of her face.

She has thin lips and a flat nose. She has pointy ears and a big forehead.   
But she doesn't have eyes. Or to say it precisely, she doesn't have eyeballs. 

She has eyesockets but they are empty.

Or...

almost empty.

Two light blue dots shine in them and as she looks around, they are moving just like any other eye, as she blinks (?) the dots disappear for a tick and then reappear.

It's like she could pierce through you with her eyes and see your deepest thoughts.  
But after some time, the feeling vanishes. 

  
It was just a little shocking for Lance at first. Now, he is perfectly fine again, feeling a little ashamed by himself.

After a brief orientation, he got the coordinates of the new stopping-points and he went to start their new course, sometimes it would be so easy with a wormhole, but he's not complaining. This ship is still faster than the most and he is free to go wherever he wants.

He reported to Regris, talked with him some and even got another mission. It was just a quick spying on his way to the second stop. He got it without a problem and continued his main mission. 

When he passed down the information he got to Thrix, she was really pleased with it, as she said, with this, they can finally beat their asses.

Lance laughed, wished good luck and told her to call him if his help is needed. He arriver to hos destination after that and passed down an alien from his ship in the third stop.

Ah, right.

He got a crew member! 

The blue alien, MG, came to him to talk (it was so good to listen to her and see how happy she seemed as she talked about her home) and she even assisted him after that. She joined to him out of her free will. And Lance welcomed her help.

She is smart.

She can't understand Spanish, but Lance saw how she's trying to learn it. And with a little success, she did it alone. She started to understand more and more.

Lance was impressed. And touched by her efforts.

He showed her how to operate the map and she showed him how to use the scanner in a more effective way after Lance told her what he wants to use it. 

They learned from each other in the short time they had.

They could just work fine together. She was a boon companion on the silent ship.

The two of them had a fun time together as they delivered everybody to their destinations.

But nothing lasts forever.

Now they are the only two remaining on the ship. It is time he needs to ask her where she wants to go, he doesn't want to let her go but he can't be selfish if she wants to go home. If he must, he will bid goodbye to her with a smile on his face.

At dinner time, they went to the kitchen and sat down together at the table with their bowls of goo. He eats slowly and quietly, Lance could not think anything good theme to bring up before he asks the most important question. Of course, his speakers are betraying now of all times.

He doesn't have an appetite so after he is half done, he puts down his spoon and looks at her. She looks restless too. She didn't even have half of her bowl eaten but she already is looking at him.

She looks hesitant.

Or he thinks she looks like that, it's still hard to read her expressions. 

"Uhm.." 

"Qeez..." 

Both of them start to speak at the same time and Lance giggles a little and MG smiles too, dissolving the tension between them.

"Please, go ahead" Lance smiles at MG and sits a little more comfortable on the seat.

"Yes... Yes, I did say before that I will think of a place where I want to go..." now she definitely looks like she is embarrassed "I know where I want to go" suddenly her eyes lit up with more fire in them and she looks directly in his "I want to go where you go" Lance's eyes grow round at this "I was here for a short time, but I saw so many things from you already. I want to continue watching you do more things. I want to watch you grow stronger and wiser. I want to help you. Grow together with you. I want to learn more things from you and teach you more" she smiles at him and Lance automatically smiles back "and I owe you my life, I want to repay that too. I want to stay here, can I?" she smiles and Lance looks at her smiling face. She has fangs, this is the first time she smiled so wide, but it's a beautiful smile.

"I didn't do it for you to owe me, you don't owe me anything MG. But if you really want to, I'm more than happy to have you here..." he smiles and holds up his glass to her "let's go and annoy the empire together" he laughs and smiles so wide that it's almost hurting his face. 

He has a new friend!

A friend who is willing to fight together with him.

\---

And now they are three movements and four mission after the start of their partnership. 

Lance was happy, it was so long that he could talk to somebody face to face and MG looks like she's enjoying their discussions, even when they only talk of nothing. Still, it was so good, Lance was cheery and enthusiastic all day and at work, he even started to make jokes to MG. She can't understand most of them so he started to teach her some Earth culture and she laughs more and more at his jokes now. She talks about her home too, and Lance is happy to learn more about her. 

They haven't been together for long but he still feels like MG is a lifelong friend of his, she is just a cool older sister figure or a cool aunt (sometimes, when he annoys her, she can be really strict). 

When Lance told Regris about her, the next quintant, Coran and _even_ Kolivan called him! They were like a father to their son's first girlfriend, it was really funny. The two of them became so excited and asked a hundred questions, it was hard to not laugh out loud, when did they become so close? They were totally in sync as they made him promise to introduce her when it's time. 

It was a great surprise how interested they were in her, but he agreed right away to their request, promising that after some time he will.

Lance didn't tell her his name or talked about his past or about the Blade of Marmora, but maybe one day he will. He can't reveal the Blade of Marmora himself, if Kolivan is ready to do it, then he will but about himself, Lance maybe could talk with her somewhere in the future.

Maybe one day they become true friends who can share these things. 

But right now he doesn't ready to open up his heart fully. He is scared to do that now. 

The only one who he shared his every thoughts and fears was Hunk, but even he betrayed him in the end. He just can't open up so soon again.

"Okay, so I found another signal. It looks like from the database that this one once was a prison... And now it became an arena but because it's just a small one, there shouldn't be any serious security..." MG walks in, holding the datapad they got for her not too long ago and he looks up at her and stands up from the table, wiping off his hands. He was working on his sniper, cleaning it making sure that it's perfect to the smallest piece. This sniper rifle is his favourite weapon, so he always makes sure that there is nothing wrong with it.

"Let's go there then and we should shut down their party. I set us on course, please start to ready the guest room and our supplies, there will be a lot of people in need of them" Lance quickly puts his rifle together as he speaks and then smiles at MG "Nice finding, we will get there fast, it's close" he goes in the cockpit and sets the ship on course, they will be going to a big fight. 

But it shouldn't be anything they can't take on.

\---

As she watches the map, following Qeez's movements on it and guiding him to the cells, she can't stop worrying.

Was it really a good idea to bring this place up to him? She knew if she mentions it then he will come here, but now that they are here, she can't help but have second thoughts.

The missions they did together were spy missions and the last one was a rescue, but it was a small galra prison. Only sentries and a joke like security systems.

It was, with Qeez's words, like stealing candy from a baby. 

Whatever it means, but it was easy for him. On the other side, it's good training for her, it's still hard to understand his language and to be the overseer of the missions. Now she can almost speak it and read it, he started to help her with it. Once he asked if it would be better to change everything to the common tongue, but she refused this right away. 

This 'Spanish' is really interesting and it's his mother language, she wants to learn it. 

He became flustered and smiled at her, saying that then he will help with it. And with his help, she learned much faster.

But she knows that he's directly choosing easier missions, because of her. Because she needs to learn and practice her way around the ship, the system, Qeez's style and most importantly, to the position of Qeez's right hand. Well, there is only the two of them but Qeez jokingly called her this once and she knew right away, she wants to be his Right Hand so she could help him with everything. Now they may be only two of them, but she has no doubt that new faces will come with time.

But she got sidetracked, now he is in an arena. It may be a small one, but it has sentries, soldiers and some druids. 

She is extremely worried but it can't stop her from doing what she needs, her work is to support him from behind.

"There are six soldier and four sentries coming in the next corner. Qeez... This is a bad idea...." she wants him to come back. This is a really bad idea! How many enemies are on that ship? He is just one person! She can't help him combat! There is this much she could help from behind a screen. This is much more enemies than she ever saw him fight against, what will happen if something happens?

"_All_ of my ideas are bad, you will get used to it" he laughs(!) and she hears as his sword slides out of its sheath. He plans to fight them with melee? Is he stupid? What will she do if he gets hurt? Or worse? 

No, wait, she saw him fight and train before, he is good with melee and better with ranged weapons. If he thinks it's necessary to fight with melee, then she should trust him.

_Argh_, her nerves.

After some time, he speaks again with a light voice, he is too cheery for this situation!

"Woah, that was close, I will become a samurai if I continue this, next time I need to make my riffle silent or should I use more my gauntlets? Those with the whip should be amazing together...I need to try it out next time. So... Where is my date my lady?" he jokes and thinks about unnecessary things.

Why does she want to hit him _so_ much?

With a deep sigh, she let's go of her urge and chooses to stay professional. Well, as professional as an amateur beginner could be.

"Go forward. At the second corner go to the left and you reach the first row of cells, at the third corner is the second row and at the fifth are the personal cells..." she quickly instructs him and watches as his dots move with great speed. He is running, looks like he's feeling the weight of the mission too, just pretends to be ignorant. There is so much on her list about him that she learned and now she added one more thing, will she ever stop adding them? Sidetracked again...Concentrate MG!!

So, the most important part of the mission, how does he even plan to get out this many people without getting noticed?

"So...What's your plan? You only told me to look out as always when you got out there and I still don't know how will you make it... Two sentries on the left... And there is a lot of prisoners here...another two down on the corridor and I want to help, how will proceed once you have everybody?" there is no answer for a tick and she can almost see how he smiles with that mischievous glint in his eyes.

"Yeah... Haha... Funny story..." he does what she thinks he does? "I just thought that I will improvise when I got there" he really did it...

"If you turn you will get to the first row... You know, I start to question your so-called sense of danger" now she feels like punching him again, maybe she will do it even if he is successful. But definitely, if he gets injured.

"Haha, don't worry, there is nothing wrong with it. I got this, oh and look, I'm here, are you ready?" his voice now is calming, it's unfair to use this tone when she has the right to be angry and worried! She can't even be angry at him for using this voice because it's working! 

"Yeah, everything is ready...ahh... Just don't get your ass handed to them... You are terrible at first aid and I still don't understand your body structure" she gave up, there will be a better time to beat sense in him. 

"You got it MG, OK, I got to the first, talk to you later, connect on emergency" she nods but he can't see it and she knows it but doesn't bother. Now she can only wait and hope that there will be nothing unexpected. 

Maybe she could take a look in the ship's cameras? But she can't hack it... Next time she needs to ask Qeez to teach her. She saw that he can, he did it before this mission too.

Counting the ticks and looking out on the enemy, waiting for him to speak, she can't do anything besides these. Should she try that hacking? Maybe she will have luck.

So she attempts to get in their system and use the cameras. 

_And_ she got lucky, the base's security is not complicated and before Qeez hacked in, he opened up all the channels. Thanks to some lazy guard, the cameras were connected together with the main system and Qeez previous work opened the way to them!!

_She can see with the cameras!_

According to the map, Qeez is heading towards the second cells now and thanks to the cameras, she can see seven prisoners with him.

They're all weak, injured and battered, some of them need to help the others to walk but they all are following the little shadow. 

This is the first time she sees him in action after her rescue, he looks exactly like how he looked back then.

Wild, deadly, dangerous, dependable.

He is working smoothly, flawlessly and without hesitation. She watches him opening all the cells and comforting everybody who comes out. She can't hear his words, but he is speaking to the prisoners and she can guess what his main point is.

After some time, he starts to walk away, towards the personal cells. Taking time to carefully observing the surroundings as now is radio silence time. MG takes a quick look around them too then her attention swifts towards the prisoners.

And just like when he saved her, these people follow him too without hassle. His back looks so reliable as he leads the not too small team. 

She watches him. Trying to read his body, trying to figure out a part of Qeez.

There is so much she doesn't know. She can feel his sadness and fear sometimes, these feelings come out randomly and it takes a tick or two for him to hides them, just enough time that she always sees them. She doesn't understand why is he haunted by these feeling but she can see one thing. He is not ready to open up, whenever some bonding moment happens, his blinding happiness switches to complete sadness. She can see it, there is something binding him down, she can't blame him. 

There must be a good reason for it. 

She is patient, she can wait. 

This boy already took a portion of her heart, she can wait for him to open his up, maybe she can even help once he lets her.

As she is pondering on him, Qeez fought off some guards and started to open up the cells. There are ten in total, all of them occupied. 

The aliens coming out of them are looking stronger than the others. And a lot more savage. Qeez speaks to every one of them and calms them down with just a few words. How does he make it look so easy? He just walked there and won over them all to his side. He just tamed ten of the most dangerous type of prisoners, the top fighters of the arena.

She can't stop admiring his talent for people.

She saw and heard him talking and talking. Changing his attitude whenever it's needed. Always perfectly seeing through his surroundings and always adapting to the needs of others. He did it when he rescued her and the others, he did it sometimes with her and he did it in the last mission and now he does it now again. 

And thanks to her watching him close, she can see it. The only time he lies is when he talks about himself and his past. She still can't understand him, why is he like this? He has confidence but at the time he doesn't. 

He is full of contradictions. 

_Ah!_ An almost giant muscle and fur came out from the sixth cell. He is certainly taller than the galrans and has a strong body. He has grey fur and pale yellow-green eyes, he looks like a galra hybrid, but like his other genes stronger, there is only a pale similarity. He looks calm as he listens to Qeez and after a nod he walks to the corner, watching out for guards while Qeez finishes his work.

The other prisoners are stepping aside from his reach as he walks by them, they are afraid of him, looks like he is the champion of this arena. It's not hard to tell, there are tales of the arenas' most powerful monsters everywhere. They're strong, merciless and cruel, the most powerful slaves the empire have. There is nothing weird in the way the others pull away from him but he doesn't pay attention to them, he only stands guard for them. _Did Qeez ask him to do it?_

Ah... This mission seems more and more troublesome. Not only the champion, but there are also twenty-three prisoners and all of them are injured more or less. Can they really help to all? Well...Qeez seems to think so and if he wants to then she has no complaint in helping him.

Qeez finally finishes and taps twice on his helmet, signalling for her for assistance, after a quick instruction from MG, he starts to make his way back. All of them are following after and the champion is at the back, making sure their backs' are safe. _Did Qeez ask him to do it?_

"Qeez! A dozen guards are on the way ahead, be careful!" she can't help but speak out, it looks like a trap for him. This counts as an emergency, right?

"Don't worry, I got it. Get the ship ready, start the engines, we're almost there. We will need to go as fast as we can before anyone can see us" she does as he tells him and prepared for depart. As fast as she can so she can offer some support for him against the many enemies. When she's finally done, she looks back at the screens. 

And her jaw falls.

The fight is already _done_? _How?_ Qeez is proficient but not a one-man army so how did he pull this out? He is already heading down the corridors, only two corners away from the ship. The bodies of the guards and sentries are scattered on the floor so he did fight. 

What happened?!

As she looks at the screens, wondering what this could be, they already reached the ship and Qeez is helping them get in, then leading them to the guest room, after the last, MG closed the airlock. After some ticks, Qeez came in and sat down on his seat, shooting off from the arena and flying them as far from it as he can, getting rid of their pursuers. MG scanned the space around them and sighed when there was nothing found. She relaxed a little and looked at the boy.

"Qeez... Are you sure this is a good idea? Twenty-three prisoners from the arena and one of them is a champion... They may be dangerous..." she is really worried, he knows that she is not much help in combat so he would left alone against somebody like that champion is something happen. As she looks at him worryingly he smiles at her.

"They didn't choose to be in the arena, not even the champion, they all just survived. You're worried because they are dangerous, but they are just as hurt and scared like everybody else. Maybe more, you never know. The most brutal champion could be the most soft-hearted and just fellow you can think of, don't fear them, give them a chance and smile. They are just people like you and me. They just need time to calm down and pull themselves together, the arena could do horrible things to the soul." he is right. She knows he is right, she knows it. But what convinces her is not that fact, it's how he spoke about it like it's not just his opinion, he sounds like he experienced it before, in person. Does he know someone who came from an arena? Was _he_ in an arena before? That could explain some things but this mystery is from his past too. There is no way that she can figure it out now. 

OH, how she wants to know... But right now she only nods, not letting the curiosity take the better on her. He is right, she needs to concentrate on the present.

"I see your point... Okay, I try to do it" she smiles at him "so now we go and see them, are you gonna seduce them or...?" she smiles as she jokes and stands up "And please, leave the first aid to me, I don't want to undo your work and do it again" she watches his eyes lit up and he laughs at her. She knows this happened only once but right now, this is the only thing she can tease him.

"Okay, I stay away from the injured. I promise" he laughs and stands up, then walks out, putting back on his helmet. 

She follows after him, watching his back with a calm smile.

The room is full of their new guests and she can feel their piercing gazes as they walk in, they already know Qeez so most of them are watching her. It gives her chills but as Qeez walks in the middle like always, they turn their attention to him. MG stays a little behind, talking to strangers is not her strong force. So instead she takes a closer look at them, making a quick check-up over them. 

Their condition is much worse than how she saw through the cameras.

Everybody is injured, some of them can't even stand up, they just lay on the bed, looking up at Qeez. There is one who is unconscious. She can feel her face gone pale and MG quickly goes there and checks up them, thankfully, they are only sleeping. Nothing life-threatening but they have some deep wounds that are in need of disinfection so she starts to tend the wounds as Qeez talks. Sometimes she listens in, letting his voice wash over her and calm her nerves, sometimes she gets really disturbed by some nasty wounds. 

She listens to his voice and works, she doesn't need to listen to the words spoken, she heard it already. It's the same monologue that she heard first, the only difference is that he introduced himself as Qeez and then MG too. The previous mission was the first they had freed prisoners and when she heard him, she felt really proud. He didn't tell her why he doesn't use his true name but the use of this nickname made her smile. Now, this name will spread in the universe and he will become a great strength against the Empire, she can feel it.

And she wants to see it happen with her own eyes.

Unlike their guests, both of them comes from a not well-known Planet from a distant corner of the galaxy, their species are not widely known. As far as she can tell though, these people are all from well-known slave planets or are half-bloods. They all are from the most suffering parts of the Galra Empire.

They have confused faces, but they still have surprisingly good control as they listen to Qeez, waiting for their time for speaking. Meanwhile, MG tends the wounds of those who let her. She walks around silently in the room and without disturbing her captain, she works on the visible injuries.

After some time, Qeez ends everything he needed to do and goes back to the cockpit, but MG stays. She still has work to do, they need her more than Qeez does right now. 

She smiles and talks to everybody who seeks out her for questions while she is working. Most of them though go to a bed and lies down to sleep after the meeting is done, she can understand it, they are all really tired so she is careful to not disturb them.

Coincidentally, the last one to treat is the champion looking alien. 

She was right, he is a giant, he is much taller than her. 

Like... With five-six heads? With his grey fur and yellow-green eyes, he resembles a galran but only a little. He has a long face and a little round ears and his eyes are narrow but they have a soft feeling as he looks in her eyes. Somehow he looks lazy? ...No, that's just the tiredness. She stops staring at his face and starts to inspect his body, looking for injuries.

There are a lot of scars and old marks but he has some nasty wounds too from recently. How many things did injure him? Claws, fangs, cuts, burns, shots and his left ear was bitten off?! And his lips... There is a small piece missing from the bottom lip, showing a part of his fangs...

If not for his eyes, he would look really threatening.

But she saw how Qeez talked to him, without any prejudice or loathing. Because he is not someone who deserves it, he deserves to be treated with kindness. She needs to see under his skin, she needs to see him for who he truly is...

She can do it too.

Sho she smiled up at him. 

"Please, sit down, I will treat your wounds." she looks at him and after a short staring competition, he complies and sits down on a free bed, now she can look into his eyes without breaking her neck.

"I help out with your worst wounds, but there are some old ones that I can't help with, those are almost fully healed and they will certainly leave more scars on you. I can help you out with your lip but I can't do anything with your ear." MG says after a quick inspection but she only gets a faint 'I see' as an answer.

Taking it as permission, she starts to work. She points out some parts that need to be frequently tended to, but she doesn't say anything else.

The last one she disinfects is his lip, leaning in close as she concentrating, moving her tentacles with great care and after the disinfection is done, she stitches it together, using a needle from the first-aid kit that Qeez showed her before. It was a fresh wound so it will heal, but it will leave a scar. As she's doing the last touches, he suddenly speaks up, making her jump a little, thankfully, she only applying a gel and a tape on the stitches to keep it together.

"You are really rebels? I mean...Do you fight against the Galra Empire? And do you fight in an organization? Or are you two some sort of mercenaries?" his yellows eyes are burning strong but they don't have malice or aggression in them as he looks in her's "The boy looks pretty young to be a paid fighter, yet he fought like a veteran and you... I never saw someone like you. You're from a druid laboratory, right? And this ship...I never saw technology like this, this is not a stolen galra ship. This is something else...And he was surprisingly collected when he freed us, not even a flinch. This was not the first to him to meet people like us? But you were afraid, so it was not with you, you seem to be a beginner, how long were you here? There is only the two of you on this ship? How did you manage to get us out of there without setting the alarms off? Do you have some relation to Voltron?" she blinks in surprise at the never-ending questions and sits down beside him while listening to all of his rambling. It's like he is not expecting answers from her, more like he's just thinking out loud. When he finally stops, she speaks up to give him some answers. She knows how frustrating to not have any.

"We're rebels, but not from _the_ Rebels, just two people who are helping others. I was a test subject for a long time before Qeez freed me and the others who were there with me. I was not here for too long but I never even heard him talk about Voltron so I don't think that we have any connection...I wish I know the answer for these questions, I'm curious too" she sighs "Qeez looks weak and you look strong, I never saw you fight before, but even though, if you two were to fight... I would bet my money on Qeez" she smiles up at him with a teasing smile "My name is MG, I'm here to help him and watch him do something that I can't even imagine. If you need anything, just ask. Oh, and I'm doing the first-aid, trust me, you don't want him to treat you" she chuckles" I will do the check-ups on your recovery, come to me when there is something" MG stands up and smiles at him one last time when suddenly he smiles back too (it's a little scary smile but well...).

"I'm Nyanz. Thank you" he smiles once again and then lies down on the bed and shuts his eyes, leaving MG to her thoughts. After blinking, she looks away and smiles while putting away the tools she used. 

This people needed their help.

She can understand Qeez's point a little better now. They are really somebody else when they are treated with sincerity and kindness. 

Maybe this mission was not a mistake after all. 

She found out something important. 

War changes people.

It changed her. It changed Nyanz. It changed planets, entire worlds. 

It changed Qeez too, she can see it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To those who want to know what I mean by the colour of 'pale yellow-green', it's a soft Chartreuse yellow, the 'Mindaro' version :) 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed! Your comment and kudo gives me happiness <3 And I'm always curious about your thoughts 8-)
> 
> Now, I just go and sink into my pillow  
See you next time <3


	17. Bad games

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let's take a look back at a certain group.  
For it, we need to go back in time a little but don't worry, we will reach the present time in the end :)

She can't believe this. 

After all her hard work and this long time... 

She worked so hard to find him. She and Hunk worked to their bones, trying out every way they could think of to find him. Looking for everywhere and using their connections. 

And nothing brought success. 

All of their attempts were a failure. 

And now. 

Now she is cursing for ten minutes straight. She can't help it, all her frustration is coming out. 

One week after their mission with Blade of Marmora, she had finally time to go through the records of that day with only one purpose. To watch closely the weird one, because she will find out why is she so suspicious about him. But it was disappointing, as he moves, interacts, everything. There was nothing odd about him. 

Except that somehow everything he did were _odd_. 

She knows it sounds crazy but she can't explain it. She tried to express her feeling to Hunk but she couldn't make him understand her. Because she knows that something is odd but she can't bring it to the surface, she tried to get her feelings more understandable. 

And now she finally can. 

At the last records, she found what she was searching for. The last ten minutes of him in the castle is everything she needed. 

This film is from a camera in the hangars. At its corner, she can see him and Coran interacting.

Yeah, yeah. It's nothing out of the ordinary, Coran always talks to the guests in the castle. 

But Coran is almost shining from happiness as he and the small alien are talking. The both of them are way too friendly for the first meeting. Like good pals who know each other for a long time. And the stranger's height is really similar as he is standing with the advisor... That stance, the shoulders and the gestures...

As they talk, they hold the other's shoulder or pat each other on the arm. Coran smiles widely and almost and looks at the masked stranger with a kind smile. She had her suspicions here but their goodbye hug was what made her sure. There was no way she would not recognize it! 

She saw that hug a hundred times before!! 

It explains so much!!! It's so obvious that she can't understand why she didn't see it before! 

The weird behaviour of Coran since Lance is gone. Why she finds him staring at his personal device sometimes. Why he didn't seem depressed or sad about losing his favourite Paladin. How he never helped in searching for him. Because he knew all along where he was! It's so obvious! They were so close, there is no way Lance would have left without telling him and he didn't want him back because it was better for Lance to be away from them. It so sad that she can't even disagree with it, it was pathetic to treat him like they did, how Allura and Shiro still does. 

But this was not the only clue! 

It's a big hint too to how she and Hunk could not find any clue of his whereabouts. How he just disappeared into thin air without any trace. If he was with the Blade in their base in all this time then it was not hard for them to hide him. Lance has friends among the blades and he was helping out them a lot and she saw them interact, the galras adored him. Kolivan said they will be looking... but he knew all along too. But there must be something from before Lance left... 

She had run to the main console and looked through some data that she thought nought before. She thought that Lance left alone, without help, but now she needed to reconsider it. 

After an hour, she found what she needed, the trace of a coded incoming call. It has the coding of the Blade of Marmora and it came around the time when he Left. It's evidence that Lance talked to somebody from them before he left! (It's another question that how did he hide the traces of the call so well that nor Allura nor Pidge found it until now but she can ask it in person if she finally gets her hands on his neck!) Now, there is only one thing that makes her curse. 

This explains why was Green so hectic on the mission, why were all the Lions a total mess, tossing their minds into chaos. The Lions knew he was back and not only Red and Blue was elated, all of them were. Still, none of them told the Paladins. 

THEY KNEW ALL ALONG! All of them! 

They knew all along, Coran, Kolivan and the blades, the Red Lion and the others, they knew and they lied and hold back the information! How could they do this while watching them broke down and lose the fights again and again? The Lions supposed to be the defenders of the universe, why did they let their Paladins break down and not do anything to help?

And why didn't she find it out for, what, six months??? He literally shoved it in her face for her to realize it. She supposed to be a genius, how could she be so stupid and blind?! 

_Pant... Pant... _

Now, that she finally finished her cursing fit she could think about her next step and so she runs at Hunk's workshop with her max speed. She needs to tell him and together they can finally bring back Lance, maybe if the jokester can forgive them, then they could be how they were before. As she dreams about their future, she crashes inside and Hunk runs to her lying figure in the robot pile and pulls her to her feet, looking frightened by her odd entrance. Hunk quickly inspects her for any injuries and then sigh, _why can't you have a simpler entrance... _

She would laugh if she had the air for it. Nowadays she's not very fit, the sleep and food deprivation has this effect. Oh, how angry Lance would be if he knew... 

But it's his fault, so now they need to get him back and for that, Pidge needs to tell her discovery to Hunk. She wanted to tell him but she could not get out one comprehensible word.

"Pidge, c'mon, breath, please... Calm down, breath" she can see that she scared him, shit. Luckily, his anxious muttering and hands on her back quickly grounds her. With his help, she finally calms her breathing down and looks up at him with burning eyes. 

"I found him! Hunk! I found him! He is with the Blade! He was our guide in the mission! They knew!" she grabs him by his vest and screams at him. Maybe it was a little too much but she needed to scream at somebody, it felt good and after letting out some of her frustration, she releases him and looks in his eyes, waiting for him to process what she said 

For a second, his eyes grew round and looks back at her without blinking then he takes off without a word, surprisingly fast. She sprints after him after a second, cursing her short legs. 

"Where are you going??!!" she runs with all her strength and manages to catch up to him. She can feel her lungs burning, why is Hunk so fast? 

"To the bridge!" he answers and fastens his speed. She lost him after a corner but runs towards the bridge. Hunk is there and she collapses on the floor beside him, who is already looking at the data that she fund and after finishing it, he's already calling the blades with their established line. It's not usually used for this kind of calls, but this is more of an emergency than anything before.

She watches his stone-hard face, his burning eyes, he looks so different since Lance left yet every time his friends is in the line, he becomes so serious and deadly. He was like this back home too, but it was not so... hardcore.

How can he be so different when it comes to Lance?? He is more determined than when they are saving the galaxy! Hunk becomes a monster when it comes to a certain blue-eyed sharpshooter...so how did things turn out this way? Hunk looks so guilty sometimes, what did _he_ do to lose his best friend? She wanted to ask him so many times already but she never had the nerve. 

The call connects and a masked face looks back at them, she can see their confusion in their silence. The one to call is usually Coran or Shiro, never she and Hunk, but he quickly recovered and nodded. 

"Paladins, what happene..." 

"Where is he?? I know he is with you! Bring him here!" Hunk lashes out. The Blade is shocked by the anger of the usual kind Yellow Paladin but when they doesn't ask who does he means, she knows that they know who Hunk is talking about. 

"What are you talking about Paladin? Who is with us?" they try to cover it up but it's too late, both of them saw their hesitation. She stands up and looks just as scary as Hunk, even with just half his size. 

"Lance! We know he is there! If you don't want two giant robot lion knocking down your doors then you better bring him out!" she feels like she could kill somebody and maybe she looks like that too because the Blade is stoic on the other side of the line, it looks like they didn't anticipate that they will found out his whereabouts. 

After a tick, he goes from stoic to hesitant "Even if you come here... You will not find him here, he is not here anymore." this shocks both of them.

"What do you mean? He was with you a week ago! Why are you hiding him?" she is angry. More than angry! They are so close to finding him and the Blade of Marmora, they allies, are hiding him from them! From his family!! This one too, how can he stand so unconcerned before them? They watched Voltron's downfall and hid one of the Paladins. Weren't they working together with Voltron to unseat Zarkon and rebuild the Empire? How could they betray Voltron like this? 

A cold voice brings her back to the present. (she is more and more lost in her thoughts these days...) 

"I will relay your request to Kolivan and he will contact you at a later date" before they can say anything, the call already ended, only leaving a dark screen before them.

She blinks two times and then looks up at Hunk and takes his hand, squeezing it gently, he looks so sad right now, the anger from a second ago is nowhere to be fund. Her giant marshmallow friend is completely burnt black and melted away, it hurts to see him like this so she tries to find something to cheer him up. 

"...Coran... Coran knows something... We should find him..." she says softly but Hunk shakes his head and instead of walking away, he turns on the speakers and speaks in it, asking Coran to come to the bridge. 

Yeah, this was a better idea. Better than running around the castle and trying to find the advisor who could be anywhere.

"Hunk... We fund him... It's him, I know... He was the guide who accompanied us in the mission...it explains so much. He was so good in reading our moves but he never spoke to us, Lance didn't want to expose himself to us, still, he was here, so it needs to mean that he is not far, he will come back..." she looks up at him with hopeful eyes but he doubtfully shakes his head, his eyes doesn't even have the slightest relief. 

"I don't understand...If you are right... Then why did he hide behind that mask? He didn't even speak a word to us... He came back, he was at an arm's length...but he still walked away without a word after being done. He saw us, he heard us and jet he...he..." Hunk's sounds broken and her eyes become moist too "He hates us...he hates us and he has all the right for it but he never was resentful, he always forgave everybody, why didn't he forgive us then?" She don't know. She doesn't want to know. She is afraid to know the answer to this question, she can't let her hope fade because if he doesn't come back, what will happen to Voltron?

She was working so hard to find him but never thought about the after. What will they do if he comes back? She wants to beat him until he promises to never do something like this again, but after that... And she and Hunk wants him back, but Shiro, Allura and Keith is just as indifferent and ignorant as before, if Lance comes back, then nothing will change and they will make the same mistakes again and chase him out again. 

But if Lance would act like an adult and do what he supposed to be doing, then there would be nothing wrong in the first place. He hid behind a mask and choose to play like an idiot, he didn't try to make them see what he does and just played the character he built up. This is not just their fault, it Lance's too. If he just talked to them and spent some more time with them then there would be nothing wrong. 

Why didn't he tried to talk to them? 

She looked up at Hunk with stinging eyes but she could not say out this question as Hunk looks like he is a step before of breaking down. As both of them are fighting in their own heads with their tears threatening to come out, Coran walks in. There is no smile on his face, but she did not expect it to have, it was a long time ago that he smiled to any of the Paladins. 

She looks at the old advisor but she can't be angry at him. He is the only one who can't be blamed in Lance's departure. Yes, he hid the truth, he lied(more or less) to them, but she can understand why he did it. In his eyes, they chased off his favourite Paladin and broke his heart. 

"What do you need my help for, Paladins?" he looks at them with his unreadable eyes and speaks with his calm tone. His eyes dart up to the still dark screen (they forgot to shut it off) but he does not say anything, not a clue of what he is thinking. As Hunk looks like he sealed his lips, Pidge pulls herself together and looks in the old altean's eyes.

"We know where is he. Coran, we know that Lance is with the Blade of Marmora and we know that you know too. You have some connection with him right? I saw you, I know that you can talk to him. Bring him back! Or take us to him! Help us get him back!" she's almost pleading at the end of it and her voice breaks once but she can't look away from his closed-off eyes. There is a moment surprise in them but he quickly hides it and sighs softly.

As he looks at the two young humans, Coran's eyes fill with sadness. 

"I could not do it, Paladins, I promised myself to not. He suffered long because of you, I can't tear his wound open again." this is the first time that he seems... old. There is no trace of his youthful soul, strong resolution and kind heart. Only the man who lost his loved ones in the war. She hangs down her head, understanding that Coran will not help no matter how many times they ask him. "but I will not stop you if you find a way to talk to him." She looks back up so fast that her neck gives out a concerning sound but she still sees the small, almost non-existent curve of Coran lips.

After taking a final long look at them, he turns around and walks out of the room without looking back, leaving them there to their spiralling heads.

They...got his permission? 

\---

"What do you mean he is NOT THERE?!" she flinches as Hunk hits the table, almost breaking it. His eyes are burning and she really wishes for Lance to be here and calm him down. But he is not. He is not here and this is the reason of Hunk's anger.

Four days after the call, Kolivan and Regris suddenly arrived at the castle. 

Why this two? She has no idea, Kolivan is understandable but Regris is just a normal blade, it was weird but she did not think much of it.

It was more important to ask about Lance.

So they walked to the bridge and demanded answers from them. And they have the nerve to say he is not with them?!

On the other side of the table, Kolivan looks at them with a calm expression. 

"He _was _with us for a time, yes. But he is not with the Blade of Marmora anymore." he says calmly and Regris nods.

"Then call him! Where is he now?" she looks at them with burning anger but Kolivan makes a dismissive hand motion.

"We do not know where he is right now. And while we _have _a way to contact him, we will not do it for you. He does not wish to be bothered by you anymore and I don't want you to hurt him again either" her eyes grow round and looks at Hunk, who lost his anger with these words. Then she looks at Coran at the corner, the altean advisor looks determined too.

They don't want them to fund him. 

To _hurt _him.

She can feel her eyes watering "We know... We know that wh hurt him before... But I... We want to make it right, he is our brother... Please..." Hunk's voice is now trembling and she nods, showing that she wants to do it too. She wants to apologize and bring him back. 

It's so hard and cold without him here. She never felt more lost in space.

There is no smiles or laughter, only hateful words and arguments. She is cold and tired, hurt and lonely now. Allura and Shiro is not even here in the room. When they heard that Pidge found him, they mocked Lance's intention and asked why does she even want him back. How can they be so blind? They are the two who are hurting the most in the war and now they are closed off, drowning in their fears and hatred.

She looks down and clutches her hands so hard that her nails are digging into her flesh.

After a long silence, she hears a sigh and as she looks up, Coran is besides Kolivan. 

"If you really want to make things better... Find him." Kolivan looks at them with stern eyes "Find him on your own and make him listen to you. But." his voice became hard " if you hurt him again, you will need to answer our anger." it's a clear threat. What happened that made him so protective? What did Lance do?

Hunk is not frozen by his treat and snarls back at him" we will never... Not again" Kolivan nods and stands up. 

"I see. We will not help you, but we will not hold you back in your search." he says and then walks out with Coran, softly talking between themselves. 

"Argh...we didn't get anything out of this meeting... He was this close... Only if I figured out it sooner..." she is angry. At herself, at Coran, at the Blade, at Lance.

At everything!

"No, at least we know that he was safe until now and we know how he looks like now. We should contact the rebels, now that he is not at the Blade of Marmora, he will likely join them. We will find him, Pidge" Hunk looks determined and it gives strength to her too. 

"Yeah... Yeah! I go start to work on some new method." she runs back to her room. Burying herself in work again.

They're close. They will find him in no time.

\---

After six months. There is nothing. 

She worked so hard trying to find any clue but she always runs into walls. Every time she thought she is finally on the right path, it suddenly twists and turns back. It is like somebody has cleaned up everything after him with the old 'walk backwards in your steps' move, did Lance do it or somebody is helped him? There is a big chance that the Blade helps him still but they are on the same stand as Coran, to not help but to not hinder them either. 

But they are still not helping, they have a connection with Lance, they know where he is but they still are only watching how Pidge is stumbling with the search. Losing her hope of finding Lance with each failed attempt and growing more and more frustrated.

The fact that the team's morale is lower than ever doesn't help either, the Empire became more fierce and aggressive. They are attacked from left and right, sometimes with powers that they never saw before.

After the defeated Zarkon and he disappeared, the stronger Commanders, Haggar and everybody who had some strength in the Empire started to fight for the throne. 

All the fractions are fighting with Voltron, fighting each other and attacking planets and merchant ships. There is nobody to lead them and there is only chaos and destruction everywhere to fill the hole that Zarkon left after himself. And what's worse, is the new rumours about the heir of Zarkon, Prince Lotor. Not even Allura knew that Zarkon had a son, it was a big surprise but not too bad. Lotor is different from Zarkon, first, he is a half-blood, he governs his colonies with great success, the planets that are under him are all loving him. But he is not winning currently the fight, he has no allies and every Commander hates and despites him for his half-blood, he needs support. 

Allura wants to join forces with him and forge an alliance with the Empire and its new Emperor. Unfortunately, they could not find him either and they don't have much free time to hunt Lotor and Lance down with the continuous attacks from the power-hungry Commanders of the Empire. 

With their weak teamwork and the Paladins' poor connection, it's harder and harder to fight against their enemies. They are all exhausted and angry, they teamwork is not improving a bit and it's frustrating everybody. So they are using the help of The Rebels and the Blade of Marmora, they fight with all the help they can get. It's hard, but sometimes they can form Voltron for a little and it keeps up their strength to try again and again. And for that, Allura is demanding the best from them, working them to the bones and barely giving them time to get themselves together, she says that until they can form Voltron for a fight without breaking down the connection they will not get free time. Sometimes Pidge don't have the energy to search for Lance, she just hits the bed and sleeps until the next mission or training.

But even though Voltron is barely running, everybody else has great moral and their strength is growing. 

The Blade of Marmora made a name for themselves as the Galra Rebels, uniting the outcasted galrans or those who do not agree with Zarkon's and Haggar's ideas and started to build a bridge between the galrans and other races. They only take part in the power struggles when attacked but the other forces paid them no mind so they can work just as good as before while building their alliance. Pidge was happy for them and it's good that their allies are becoming stronger, but she could've sworn that Lance has his hands in it. The Blade of Marmora was so closed off from the start and yet they are getting more and more known and accepted with impressive speed. Lance was always a good mediator between groups and he has a great talent to people, he is definitely helping them. 

But there is still nothing about him, not even a stray rumour. 

The Rebels are growing in numbers, more and more planets and races are standing up against the Empire and joining them to fight, getting rid of their tyranny. This current war of power is making everybody afraid and resolute to free themselves and stop the Empire. There is a need for the Rebels, they are getting more and more call, asking for support to join the Voltron Coalition. The group grew in size and surprisingly, they had built an authority system when it was time. It works well and now they can coordinate and manage themselves efficiently.

She heard some gossip -well, they are more like some myth- about a rebel called Qeez who is freeing prisoners and raiding druid laboratories and arenas. Apparently, Qeez is not part of the freedom fighters but they are helping out the Rebels here and there and Qeez was the one who helped them build their new system, yet he didn't take the offered position and stayed independent with their own crew. Qeez is a shadow who never showed up officially and there are no records of him except the words of the ones who actually met them. From what Pidge heard, it's not known when he showed up or how old are them, the ship Qeez uses is a dark colour but they don't know its name and he never asked for help with repairing so nobody knows what technology is it made with. The only thing everybody knows for sure is one thing, Qeez's crew has a bunch of different species, Qeez does not care about one's race and they are always ready for everybody. Pidge heard that their closest companion is a blue alien who can see through one without easy and he has a giant and cold-blooded, half-galra champion under control.

Qeez is just as hard to track as Lance and Lotor, they show up here and there but you never know where they will pop up again, Qeez is always on move and they are hard to find or connect. As much as this shadow rebel is known, it's sure that they are real and they are a great help to everybody in the war, especially to those who fall outside the radar of the bigger groups like Voltron and the Rebels.

At Allura's request, ah who is she kidding, at her demand, she was working to make contact with Qeez. This rebel group was not connected to any bigger group, yet they are successful and they already proved their professionalism, because of these -and because they desperately need allies- Allura wants to take them in the Voltron Coalition, Voltron would provide them funds and they could improve them, it's a win-win situation if Qeez agrees.

Despite the urgency to find them, It was hard to do so, there was no radio line that she could find, the Rebels didn't know any means to speak to either, they always just appeared after all, without spending too much time on a rebel base and they were really slippery. When she finally found a location and Voltron arrived there, Qeez was already gone! How did they do it? She has no idea but they are good at evading, but why does a rebel avoiding Voltron, THE VOLTRON? 

Is it all just coincidence?

Well, no matter what she became angered with this another failed hunting.

It was a frustrating hide-and-seek. 

It's not a surprise that Allura got quickly tired of it too, after a couple of weeks, Allura placed Qeez and their hunting on the sidelines, saying that there are more important things they need to work on. There is no time to do something so unfruitful and useless where they could do something worthwhile instead.

Allura had a short temper at that time already and the circumstances did not help it.

She had a big argument with the Blue Lion and she was closed off for two weeks already. '_T__rue Blue Paladin, what a joke...' _Pidge could not help but scoff at this another display of wrongness in their situation.

Because of Allura's temper, they trained more. Harsher. Why can't she see that more training does not help them out of this? They are already strong psychically, the problem lay elsewhere, in a corner where their 'wise' leaders doesn't look. 

No matter how much they trained, they just didn't become better. It's so frustrating, in the team training, they are barely hitting the level of their old times -that's is only because they became stronger individually- and yet nobody shows regret about chasing off Lance. It was... disappointing to see Shiro and Allura so _blind_. They were so wise before, how could they become like this? How did this happen?

She was disappointed and sad. She had Hunk as company in their short breaks, but he was so silent, angry and anxious all the time, it became worse as time went on and they did not see a hair of Lance, Pidge saw Hunk become depressed once, back on Earth when Lance went home for his...hmm...his relative's funeral for two weeks, Hunk lost his drive and he turned to himself, barely speaking, but it was different now. Back then, they both knew that Lance will come back and when he did, Hunk became his sunny self again, but now... now they don't know if, no! _when,_ when Lance will come back.

Coran was still the same, always doing something and repairing or looking at his personal device and smiling (Pidge now is sure that he talks with Lance with it but she can't take a look because it's always with the old altean and Coran doesn't have a hole in his defence) and while he is a bit softer with her and Hunk, he is still disappointed with them so he doesn't help. Now, Pidge can see sometimes an odd expression on his face when he looks at Allura, something between disappointment, anger, sadness and...something much deeper that she can't read.

Her only joy in the castle is Green, to who she is closer than ever after her revelation and remorse, and Rovel 3.0. She built it for helping in her work and sometimes, spying on Coran. She wants to get her hands on that device! But she built Rovel for emotional safety, she was always better with wires and codes than emotions, Pidge needed something to take her mind away from all the shit they are in right now.

They were working hard, trying to defeat Haggar and bring peace to the Universe. Fight, train, work, listen to or join in an argument, eat and sometimes sleep, 

She lost track of the time, almost mechanically working every day. 

Her only driving force is to find Lance to make everything right again. But it was a dim hope and she saw how Lance's existence was abandoned as their forced balance somehow got more stable with time. They could almost fight a battle like a team. 

Until they got a coded message from their potential allies.

"Dear Princess. I believe we both would benefit an alliance between our forces. For the negotiation, my only requirement is the Blue Paladin as head from Voltron. Be at the coordinates in time or the deal is off, as Emperor pro-term, I cannot disappear for long times. I have great expectations for our union. Lotor"

It was a short message but after a short argument, they all agreed that it's worth to give it a chance, they will have the Lions and the castle so they can fight even if it a trap, but if it's really Lotor and he really wants to join forces, then it's a great opportunity.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter, yeeey :3 sorry it took so long.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed. What do you think? I think there are a lot of misunderstandings between them and they need to communicate with each other more. Of course, it would be a great help too, if they could just let go of their selfishness and think about other people, but they don't care...only thinking about themselves...hahh...It must be so hard for Coran to stay in the castle...  
I tried to show how Pidge is working on the problems, but don't forget, she is not a reliable narrative. She is grieving and fuming with anger, she was always bad with emotions and she is bad with other people. Still, I don't show you the other Paladins' or Coran's pov, for now, imagine what you want and read in what you can, at a later chapter, we will see :)
> 
> Please leave a comment and a kudo, they really mean a lot for me. I'm always curious about your opinion, so don't be shy <3


	18. Just how did this happen?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things happen :D  
I used italic for the part when Lance is remembering.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, here is the next chapter and I'm like, really, really, really sorry that it took so long. I be honest, I have it done for two weeks now but as you know, I read and fix up parts at least three times, it's usually don't take this much time, I was just really tired and I could not read it through.  
I still don't feel like this is good now and most likely I will fix it up once in the future but I feel guilty for having it and not sharing and I really want to write the next part ><
> 
> So I hope you will enjoy it.

With the wormholes, the team quickly reached the given coordinates.

It was a big enough asteroid for the castle and Lotor's ship to land on with an acceptable distance between each other. The galra prince's ship was already there, unarmed and without any sort of defense, if they choose to attack it, they would kill the prince and his crew in a minute. Prince Lotor now seemed a little too trusting and innocent but it was a little reassuring, it seems he really is serious about wanting to strike down a deal with Voltron. 

The team already discussed what to do when the ship reached the surface. 

Coran stayed in the castle if there is an emergency and they need support and the others started to walk towards Lotor's ship to meet in the middle with Lotor and his entourage. Allura walked on the front, of the Paladins, wearing the Blue Paladin armour and a smug face, Lotor's words in the letter, asking for the Blue Paladin as the voice of Voltron, made her wear that smile and strengthened her Blue Paladin status, according to her. (Pidge has some questions with that trough, Lotor words made her uneasy, not sure if they are on the same waw-length.)

As they reached the middle, the other group stopped too, looking at them and standing tall, imposing in their dark armour with a slightly different pattern from the usual galra armour. 

Lotor is standing before four figures, women if their build is anything to go by. They are the notorious Generals of him, they don't look too friendly. All five of them is wearing helmets with a transparent front, just like the Paladins, so they can see the other party's faces. Lotor has a diplomatic smile but his eyes are scanning them, looking for something and by the frown between his brows, he didn't fund it. Whatever he was looking for.

Pidge can't see but he sure that Allura has a poker-face on, like always when she is negotiating, but she can see Shiro, who seems to catch the prince's search too because he seems uneasy and he clenches his fists but before he can say anything, Allura steps forward and greets Lotor.

"Prince Lotor, It's an honour that you approached us. I'm Princess Allura of Altea and these are the Paladins of Voltron" she introduces them and they all nod as Allura calls their names "Shiro, the Black Paladin, Keith, the Red Paladin, Pidge, the Green Paladin and Hunk, the Yellow Paladin" she turns back at the prince who has a clearly noticeable frown on his face "as per to your request, I'm here to negotiate with you about a possible alliance between Voltron an-"

"Where is he?" Lotor cuts in, looking at Allura with ice-cold eyes and the General on his right swifts behind him "I think I made it clear to let the Blue Paladin handle the discussion yet he doesn't even present, what is the reason for it Princess?" he asks and Pidge curses silently, Lotor really referred at him. But cookies to Allura, she didn't back down as he faced Lotor.

"You asked for the Blue Paladin and here I am." she can say with such confidence that Pidge really gives her a point for that, but this was the wrong answer and Lotor's face darkens.

"Do not take me for a fool. The Blue Paladin is the blue-eyed boy, Lance. I saw you work Voltron, he is the one who establishes the connection between you and the new species you saved, from my sources, he doesn't have prejudice and he approaches everybody equally. I wish to have him as a mediator as well. There is no news about him being captured or dead, so, where is he?" now he definitely looks angry. And they are fucked. 

"Lance is no longer a Paladin of Voltron. He was not qualified to be one and now I am the Blue Paladin. You can negotiate with me or not negotiate at all" Pidge and Hunk both look at her with disbelief and Shiro takes a sharp inhale. Looks like Allura's facade broke down and her anger and impatience came forward. In front of them, Lotor hides his feelings and smirk comes forward after listening to the princess.

"How unfortunate. I knew that Voltron is behaving strangely but who have thought is because of the change of Paladins." he chuckles and his General taps on his shoulder once with a calm face, at that, Lotor takes a good look at all of them and then sighs "Let it be as you wish _princess_. It's a shame that it became such a waste of time, I will now withdraw. Thank you for your attendance, I wish you good luck." Lotor turns away and walks back towards his ship, but after a couple of steps he stops and looks back "If you ever regain the blue boy. Contact me" he smirks and walks away, leaving them stunned.

They did not expect him to withdraw just like that. Doesn't he in need for allies? 

What was this??

Suddenly, Allura huffs angrily and speed-walks back to the castle, Shiro running after him, concerned.

Keith looks at them with troubled eyes.

"What did he mean by Lance making contact? Allura was our diplomat all the times..." he looks at Hunk and Pidge like they knew the answer. She shakes her head but Hunk hums.

"Well...Lance always made sure to talk to the locals. He has a lot of gifts from the places we were, he got them all as gifts of friendship..." Hunks sighs and Pidge can feel her throat tightening.

'_What did they do to not even notice Lance doing it? It takes time to befriend strangers yet he did it everywhere when the team didn't look...'_ Did they...did she knew him at all? 

"It's still just Lance being Lance and fooling around while we worked. How does that count as the most important part of the diplomacy?" he asks and Hunk just growls at him.

"And I thought you finally reflected" He almost spits at Keith and then walks away as Pidge looks up at Keith "It's something important. Go and think about it between destroying two bots" she says and follows after Hunk.

As time goes on, there is more and more outsider who knows Lance better than them. 

How did this happen?

\---

How did this happen?

In five short movements, Lance's little team grew into an actual team. It's like MG broke down some invisible door and people started to approach him.

The first one was Nyanz. After a movement with them, he came to Lance and told him that he wants to join, that he spoke with MG and he wants to help too. Lance got some background info from him, apparently, Nyanz lived in his mother's planet, fighting with the local rebellion against the galra but got caught in a big scale purge and then tossed in the arena. Lance accepted him, MG was happy that he will have a companion out in the field and Lance went with it, it was not bad for him.

The second and third were a couple from the rebels. They didn't have a crew, always filling in where there is a need but when they heard about him and learned that he doesn't have a crew either, they wanted to join in. The girl, Nathajan, looks like an elf from a fantasy movie, her species name is eoathi and her planet is Crazan VI. She has long pointy ears (longer than the alteans') and has almost shining white irises while the whites of her eyes are black. Her hair is black, reaching to her shoulders and her skin is red with brighter stains. Burn stains. With the chakrams on her hips and the riffle on her shoulders, she seems like a fierce warrior. She is the more talkative out from them. 

The man, Brehjin, is from the same species, but his skin is a dark red, almost black and his eyes are shining green. His black hair is in a messy bun. He is more of a man of silence but he talks when it is needed. With a lot of sarcasm and snarls. He can be kind of... unsettling. Thankfully, Nathajan always there to ease up him. Brehjin is some of an engineer, he is good with his hands and knows his stuff if it comes strategy, it's good to have someone to plan together. Lance is enjoying now this 'let's save others' kind of work. It helps to have more opinion before a mission. 

MG and Nyanz are great too, but MG is inexperienced and Nyanz don't know these things, but he is a great help and can carry out any orders while Nathajan and Brehjin are both more of a seasoned veteran, with years of experience in the rebellion against the Empire.

Lance is happy to have his friends, they are all great!

The newest member is Norzg, a scranziest. He... He looks pretty normal too. A little taller than Lance with greyish skin and red eyes. He is bald with only a dirty silver beard on his face, he is the oldest amongst them, but only with a couple of deca-phoebs older than MG.

The last three movements were spent in learning to work together, to become a real team and trust each other.

They all have roles now. 

Norzg or just Nor by his nickname is the steward. He does the cooking, supply managing and helps out MG in medic. He is good with shield and an ace in a fight.

Nathajan is a fighter and the security specialist. She is starting to get used to the combat system of the ship too. Now that there are enough people on the ship, they can use it if needed.

Brehjin is the role of engineering and maintenance. He also helps Lance with strategy, he has good intuitions. He has a pistol and a short sword, but he is not great in combat. In his free time, he loves to research, developing new gadgets and weapons. 

Nyanz is their vanguard. He is a close combatant and so he is the greatest help for Lance out in mission.

MG is the second-in-command, the right hand of Lance. Also the medic and operator. MG doesn't fight, but she has a crucial role in the missions and she helps in the maintenance.

Lance is the captain and a joker in the ship. He helps out in engineering, cooking, maintaining, and operating. He's navigating, he works on the strategy and diplomacy (if needed). He had run the ship for phoebs so he knows all the work more or less. Lance is only banned from the medical work by MG and he is happy to comply, he does not have the stomach for it.

Lance even opened up two unused room for his crew. (It's so good to have a crew!!) A chamber to sleep comfortably in and storage where they can store weapons, clothes, supplies and everything they want.

It feels good to use more space on the ship. There is more life around him, it gives back his strength to fight. 

But now, as he lays on the makeshift nest on the floor, lying between Norzg and MG in a really uncomfortable shape with pain stabbing his head and a numb arm -because MG uses it as a pillow- Lance is trying to remember last night.

\---

_Today is the day. _

_Lance already took a long time to get his courage but now he knows he needs to tell them._

_To tell her, to MG._

_His team, his friends._

_Lance knew it's not fair to hide his past and his name from them, hiding behind the nickname MG gave him. It's a good name and Lance loves it but he still feels the need of coming out clean. He swore to himself that he will not run away always. He is not on Earth anymore and if he can't share this with his new team, then he can't share with them anything important. _

_They already met the Blade of Marmora, though._

_They took it well. Lance worked on some missions before he finally took them to the second base to meet Kolivan, Regris and the others. His space family, Regris quietly told him to go and introduce his new to them and after a few quintants, Lance complied. It was nice. His team was surprised that Lance has such a strong backing but they accepted it without a doubt. It felt nice to have them accept this part of him so easily._

_They spent there a day, bonding with the Blade. From then on, they did bigger missions for them that Lance could not do before because he was alone. It was good to do more for them and Kolivan was, is thankful for his help. _

_Then the most unexpected thing happened._

_Coran suddenly appeared in the base. _

_Lance was in a long missed embrace of his favourite altean and he hugged him back tightly. Coran told him that Kolivan informed him that Lance will bring his team to the base so he flew there, using a good excuse to get away from the castle ship. He was eager to get to know the people Lance talked about. Coran made sure to let them know, that if any of them hurts Lance, he will hunt them down and make their life miserable. _

_He scared not only Brehjin and Nathajan but Nyanz too! And MG instantly got along with the ginger man, they talked in private about something and then came back like they knew each other in all their life._

_Lance was curious to know what they talked about but they did not tell him._

_Anyway!_

_The important part is, that Lance introduced them to the Blade of Marmora and his space-uncle. And they all called him Leo in front of them, yet nobody asked him about it later, they all respected his will to keep things in secret._

_They trusted him, respected him and they were ready to fight beside him, risking their lives because they want to help him._

_And Lance is trusting them and is ready to risk his life for them._

_It was time to open up._

_So Lance flew the ship to a safe planet and called a team meeting._

_When they all took a seat around the table in the holo-room. _

_(Lance named it. He cleaned up one of the rooms, placing a table in the middle and a device on it. It was a holo-map they used now for briefing and planning. Lance made it after his team grew into what it is today, they needed a place like this now.)_

_Lance was standing at his usual spot, the others sitting on their usual seats too, looking at him curiously as he fidgeted with his hands._

_Then, after a deep breath, he looked at their eyes one after another. Looking at MG last._

_"I want to tell you something. I know I kept many things from you but you deserve to know it. I...thanks for letting me be, even after you all met with the Blade. I needed time." he smiles at them "but I'm ready... " Lance takes another tick to gather his strength "My...My name is Lance Alejandro McClain, my family calls me Leo, you heard it too" he smiles" My race is human, I'm nineteen years old, it's a little less than nineteen deca-phoebs. My species is not so advanced, we just started to space travel, we just reached the edge of our star system." he chuckles and Brehjin speaks up before he can continue._

_"Then how did you get out here, so far away from your planet?" he asks and Lance nods._

_"Yes...It was something really unexpected. You know, back at home, there was a mission where three people disappeared. I and my friends, Hunk and Pidge saw one of them crashing on our planet and when we rescued him from the government, Keith joined it and we all saved Shiro." he smiles and Lance can see as the two eoathis recognize the names "Not long after that...We found a Lion, the Blue Lion and flew away from Earth, we landed on Arus, found the castle of lions, there two altean awakened from their cyro-sleep. Their names are Allura and Coran...Then we found the other Lions and started to fight a war we never knew about." Lance sputters the end but the others still understand him and he can that he has their full attention. "And we became the Paladins of Voltron...I was the Blue Paladin, Paladin of the Blue Lion, Right Leg of Voltron." he looks down at his hands. His knuckles are white from how hard he's gripping the table._

_"Ha! I knew it!" Lance looks up and catches as Nathajan gives some credit to Norzg, then he looks up at Lance "Sorr' lad, do't wanna scare ya, we jast had th's bet." he laughs and Lance is so dumbfounded that he just blinks at his friends "Bet?" he asks faintly and Nath sighs._

_"Yes, before we met with the Blades, we were guessing that who you are, we could not agree on anything and then we made this bet. I betted on you being an altean clone who freed himself from the galra laboratories, this old buffon went with you being a Paladin of Voltron." she looks sharply at Norzg "I start to think you knew something from the start..." she almost pierces him with his eyes and Lance looks at Norzg too, his curiosity picked. How did he know?_

_"Yah, do't gave me ya look, pixe!" Norzg laughs and waves his hand at her "Volt'n is famo's! Its Paladins aven so! The'es whips' of tham avrewhe'. I h'ard this a' that, saw reco'ds of tham. I was su'pised bat knew' the lad f'om tha sta't" he laughs and Nathajan sighs._

_"True, Voltron helped the rebels a lot of times, how did I not see it..."_

_Lance just silently listens in the conversation and looks at the others' reactions, fearing to see doubt and scorn._

_But Nyanz looks at him with lazy eyes and a warm smile, he accepted it without question._

_Brehjin just watches from beside Nath and nods at him, forming with his mouth a silent 'I knew'. (How did they know? Yeah Voltron is famous just like Norzg did say but Lance was just Lance...okay, maybe they had a relatively easy job to figure it out.)_

_Lastly, he looked back at MG. She seemed touched and proud, she believed him and accepted it. _

_They all did!_

_It feels good to have is off from his shoulders._

_"But I don't understand. How did a Paladin of Voltron become a rebel? Wasn't being a Paladin...a lifelong burden?" Nathajan looks at Lance again and Lance sits down in his seat._

_"Not always..." he sighs and tells them everything, just like he told Kolivan. And more._

_The Garrison, his friends, the start of Voltron, the team, the dynamics, the bigger events, his tendencies and his doubts about his place in the team, how the team treated him, how he tried to repair the broken bonds and how he failed. How he chose to end it. His time with the Blade of Marmora and the start of his rebel carrier._

_He told them everything. _

_When he stopped, he noticed that he has tears in his eyes, but it was a lot easier to talk about all this than the last time. He is on his way of letting go._

_His mama always told him to not cry over spilt milk._

_Suddenly, there are arms around him and he is almost crushed. _

_Ah, Nyanz is hugging him._

_Then there is a softer hug from his back, MG. And another, another and another._

_This...This is their first group hug!!!_

_This made Lance laugh out loud and he buried his wet eyes into Nyanz's chest. It was so long that he had a group hug, it feels so good._

_He feels a lot lighter now._

_"Naw, I jast kno' what we need jast righ'!" _

_Lance heard Norzg laugh again as they separated from the group and with this, they started a team-building night._

_Well, Lance says team-building but Norzg made food, brought out some alien whiskey and they had a feast._

_It's a mystery what that alien whiskey was or where did Norzg get it from, but it was strong as hell, they drank three bottles and it knocked them all out._

_Before that though, they made a nest out of the blankets they have on the ship and they all slept there, using each other as a pillow._

\---

That's it. The last thing Lance remembers is the nest as he practically crashed in them.

It was a good night, they had a lot of fun together and it was nice to take a break from the war, even for just a day. They all needed it.

And Lance needs to remember to check on Norzg's drinking habits. He alone drank one bottle to get to the state the others were in.

\---

Lance cursed under his breath, dodging to the side to avoid a sword coming for him and several blasts from the enemy sentries. These shitty robots attacked them out of nowhere when they were on their ways to free the prisoners from this galra prison. Lance pressed his lips together and aimed, shooting a series of blue lasers from his rifle, shooting out six robot soldier that stood around his team.

He didn't even flinch when Nyanz lunged past him, taking out two robots with his sharp claws and then ripping apart two other. Nathajan followed after him and took out three other with her chakrams.

Lance sighed and set down his rifle on the floor beside him, checking the perimeter, he did not want to get surrounded again. When he did not see another sentinel robots came through the doors, he stood up and stretched out his back slowly. 

"There is two cell block on the ship, a southeast and a southwest row, you can reach them from going down on the two hallways opening at the end of the one you are currently in" MG's calm voice comes from their communicators and Lance sighs.

"We should split up. Z, Nath, go to the southeast, I go to the west. Be careful, this base is heavily guarded. Take the utmost caution and meet me back here in 10" Lance takes his rifle in his hands and runs down on his way towards the southwest cell block.

This mission started rough, the base has a heavier defence than they knew and they run into some problems already, just like the surprise attack from before. There is something more here than they documented?

When he got to the prisoners, he found three blocks and started to open up them. It was weird, the prisoners were unusually calm and it doesn't seem like they were hurt too badly or experienced on but he didn't dwell on it too long, he needed to get everybody out safe. He opened the last one and Lance was looking at the prisoners' faces as they walked out, when his breath stopped.

A human! A middle-aged man is standing before him in dark purple prisoner clothes and with strong brown eyes.

This was not something he was expecting!

MG must have seen him become stone because she was calling for him, her voice brought him out of his haze and he looked at the nine prisoners he let out. 

"My name is Qeez, I'm a rebel against the Empire if you want to get out of here, follow me." he spoke to them with his usual business voice and then started to make his way Bach towards the meeting point where Nyanz and Nathajan were already waiting for him with four prisoners. When he got there, they made their way back to the ship together, Nath and Lance at the front and Nyanz looking out for their backs. 

With MG's help, they quickly reached the ship and loaded the prisoners in while Lance tried not to stare at the human. He looked somewhat familiar but he could not get a hold on it. 

Finally, everyone was on and Lance made their escape and made sure to not leave any track of the ship, doesn't want to endanger his crew and his guests. 

He was fidgeting with the console and tried to take as much time as he could but MG was looking at him, she knew it was time to greet the guests but she did not why is Lance dragging the time.

"There is something wrong Leo?" she looks at him with concern. They decided to call him that when the team is on his own but he is still Qeez on missions and to the outside.

"No... It's just... There is..." Lance sighs and goes limp in his seat "there is a human among the prisoners... I didn't meet another human since I left Voltron... He looks familiar but I don't know who he is... Should I reveal that I'm a human too?" he looks at her and she blinks twice at him before answering.

"At the rebels, there was another human..?" she asks with an uncertain tone and Lance nods

"Right... Matt, he is Pidge's brother. He, Shiro and..." Lance can feel his eyes growing round and he jumps at his feet and runs down to the guest room. 

He stops in the middle and searches for him then almost runs there, scaring the poor man but he can't feel guilty, he needs to know.

"Are you Samuel Holt?" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was it... If you saw something I should fix, please tell me.  
I hope you enjoyed! I will back with the next as fast as I could <3  
Please share your thoughts with me, your comments give me strength and heal my soul <3


	19. Want you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam is on the ship and there are reunions everywhere :D  
Some play tag, some bond and a little gossip.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just really want to say thank you for the 3000+ hits <3 thank you!
> 
> I hope you will enjoy the chapter <3

Maybe once Lance would've laughed at the face the man did in front of him when he took off his helmet.

Samuel Holt is known as a genius on Earth (and Lance now knows that his son and daughter is that too). He was surprised when Lance almost jumped at him, asking for confirmation for his suspicion and when he nodded, Lance dragged him in the holo-room and pushed him in a seat while he sat down too, facing the other human. They sat there, facing each other for nearly a dobosh, then, Lance took off his helmet and Samuel's eyes grew round and his face lost its colour. He looked like Shaggy from Scooby-Doo when he sees a ghost or a monster.

Once, he would've laugh but now he could only smile tiredly at him with sympathy shining in his eyes. There are so many unexpected things happened to him already that he's now a little better at handling them.

But the man in from of him is in this sculpture state for several doboshes now and Lance starts to think if his genius is lost to the past thanks to the captivity. Like, he understands, really, that it's not a common, everyday occurrence to meet another human in space, let even one he knows the other's name, but it's still several doboshes and Lance has work to do and yes, he is happy and excited, but he starts to get impatient. Oh god, did he _break_ him? 

That's it, if he broke him then Pidge will kill him. Lance needs to quickly do something about it because he doesn't want to end like that. So he decides to break the ice and drop some bones.

"Take a picture, it lasts longer." he jokes weakly, even wriggling his eyebrows but he's still unresponsive. Looks like it's not the right way. Let's try another one then "I know I'm breathtaking but if I broke you before I can get you to Katie, she will break my neck" he sighs with a sly smile on his face and...

He blinks!

It's not broken! Yay for Lance! At the second try, not bad, not bad.

"How... Why... I..." He talks too! ...Not comprehensive _but_ it's still more than he got before. Man, this was really a close call. "How... Katie? Do you know her? But how are you _here? _Earth not developed space travel yet. How are you out here, so far away from Earth? And how are you not caught by the Empire? And this ship... It's nothing I saw before...How did this happen? And Katie! Take me to her? She is out here too?! Why is she here? What happened to Matt? My crew? How did you find me? Someone sent you?" now he talks, walks and freaks out too. It was a quick change of pace from the statue state. It's still his responsibility if Sam breaks himself before Lance could try to mess up again? 

Yeah, not like they cared before if something was his fault before blaming. He don't want to play it again so he needs to do something. Deep breaths, you can do this Lance. 

He walks up to him and gently grabs his shoulder, leading him back to sit down." I know I just dropped a bomb at you, I know Katie or Pidge, she goes by that name now, from the Garrison. I even met Matt out here and" he quickly stops the older man from speaking "they both doing great." he smiles to reassure the worried parent and sighs inwardly. This will take some time, he needs to compensate MG later for tossing his work at her. "Have you heard of Voltron Mr Holt? Because it answers all your questions." Lance smiles and then tells him the tale of Voltron, how they found it with Pidge and Hunk and Shiro and Keith and how they become Paladins. How Pidge is a great Green Paladin and how hard she works for the team, how desperately she is searching for her family, how they got to know who she is. (Not yet mentioning her zero interest in taking care of herself.) And he told him about some missions, about some important matters, not saying too much about himself. "And after some time, my time as a Paladin was up, I left and now I'm here. I met Matt at the Rebels, I can't help you get to him because I don't exactly know where he is but I will get you to Pidge.

I will take you to my allies, they have a connection with Voltron and once the message is out that they have you, Voltron will be there as fast as they can, maybe a quintant or two. And Pidge will take you to Matt then, don't worry. I'm sure she has a way to reach him." Lance smiles kindly at the man, it was a lot to take in at once but he needed to tell this much to calm him down." Oh, right. As you can guess, I'm a rebel myself and now I have other refugees on board, please call me Qeez in public, only my team and said allies know my real identity, I don't want it to spread and cause some avoidable trouble. And sorry but... I can't take you right away to my allies base, they don't like outsiders too much and they need to keep themselves in the shadows as much as they can. I will send home the other refugees and _then_ will I send you to your family." Lance smiles apologetically at him "I leave you to your thoughts now, I know this all is a lot to take in, join the others in the guest room or you can go to the other rooms that my team uses, rest, eat and be comfortable. You have time to get through your thoughts, you are safe here Mr Holt."

"Sam" came the sudden voice of his companion. He was silent apart from the questions at the start but it's good to know that he's ok "Just call me Sam, Lance." he smiles and grabs his shoulder, just like the way Shiro used to, making Lance almost cry. It was so long that he got this familiar feeling from somebody out here. He didn't get much kindness from this _ex-_team and this new team was new, MG is the one who is closest to him but she's not that touchy. He's suddenly really missing his father... He would always grab his shoulder and smile at Lance when he did something good, like helping out his siblings or mother. Or getting a good grate at school...

Lance can feel that his smile is weak but he still smiles back "Yeah... Okay" he nods and stands up, he needs to go before he starts to cry from homesickness. It was so long he cried and he doesn't want to start it again. "I need to go and do what I'm supposed to... But you can talk to me anytime or to anybody from my team, Norzg has a bit of an accent but it's just because he has a second tongue that makes things difficult for the translator, don't worry about it" Lance smiles "I need to go now, welcome aboard Sam" Lance smiles and then walks out of the room. Totally _not_ running away before he starts to weep.

* * *

The time after was a little blur for Lance, he was working on getting in touch with their guests' teams or anybody they wish to go to. Most of them chose to go to the Rebels so it made easier for him and his team to send them off. And faster too. 

Along with this work, he continuously got calls and messages from the Rebels, asking for assistance with their work or their new system. When Lance helped them, he used a human method from history to work with, it was a good fit for the dozens of little scattered rebel groups to unite. There are so many different species amongst them that they could not work in an organized way, it has a strain on their works. So, Lance stepped up and helped them whenever they needed him.

There was that old movie, Valerian and the city of thousand planets, Lance used that idea to create a main base for the rebellion. An always moving giant mass of ships, connected together into one giant base. They can connect on or off whenever they need and they can meet more often, they can have a steady base for operations and they can create a main board for managing.

The bigger groups had something like that before so they helped too and took off a lot of weight of Lance's shoulders, it worked out and now they are like a young business, getting used to the new system and working on stabilizing themselves. Now, Lance is not part of their managing anymore, he left them to do what they want how they want, he's just a part of the Rebellion, a small team so he didn't feel like he should go and order people around. They formed a council with the bigger groups leaders, he still got calls from them and he helped them but there was one thing he could not wrap his head around. Almost every quintant, he got a request from them to join the council. He declined it every time yet they did not stop. Why do they think he could join them? He's not someone who can be trusted with work like that. 

He doesn't want it either. It was already straining when he was alone and he needed to work things out by himself but now that he is a captain of a small group, he has people under him who will get hurt if he messes up. Lance never wanted to become a leader but this is something he needs to grow into. A captain of a ship. Sometimes it feels good but there is that heavyweight of the lives of his crew on his shoulder that keeps him awake. It just hard to turn off and rest a little. 

But he has great friends who care for him and help him. They help him shoulder the responsibilities and help him cheer up. 

He never felt this good out in space like right now. (Even if the people around him see something that he doesn't have.)

But he got sidetracked. Samuel Holt, yeah, he was speaking about him. It was some quintants later when he saw Sam again after their talk and he was surprised to find him and Brehjin, digging in a wall in their holo-room, almost shoulder deep and talking with a tech language that Lance never understood. They were so deep in it that they didn't notice him walking to their side. He stood behind them and peered inside the wall. 

"Yo, something is wrong?" at his voice, the two jumps a little and looks up at him, Brehjin grumbles something about damaged vires and goes back to his work as Sam looks up at him.

"Yes, I noticed that the hologram and the lights sometimes flicker and when I was in the cockpit with MG" wait, what? "I noticed that the screens had some lapse when she's putting in commands. And MG told me that last time when you guys got in a fight, the ship got some damage that you and Brehjin repaired. But it seems that the laps and flickering has a different reason and I know my way around ships a little... "he trailed off and smiled up at Lance with the same smile that he saw Pidge do when she knew she's in trouble. A face that tells him Sam is just like her daughter. 

Lance could not help but laugh at this.

" Hey, it's OK, something's not good? Hm... All this tech is a giant hybrid now... The base is altean, then my friends from the Blade upgraded it and then I made some touch-up on it too..." Lance sits down and looks up at him with a guilty frown on his face "I never was a great engineer or had great technical skills but I learned at the Garrison and from my friends... "and now Lance lost all his confidence" did I... Did I mess up something? " Lance can feel his throat go dry and his hands sweat. Shit, did he mess up his ship by playing around? Because there is no way that the others would do a mistake that could do something like this.

"Ah, no. I don't think so, if that would be the case then there would be bigger malfunctions in the system. If there is a problem in the technical process, then that's nothing serious.." Sam seems deep in thought, looking at Brehjin as he works, Lance waited patiently for him "Can you show me where you programmed the system? Maybe I can find the problem there" he looks up at Lance with shining eyes. The type of eyes when Pidge fund something interesting, wanting to take it apart. The type that spoke of vargas or even quintants of tech-magic.

"Yeah, I show you, come with me" he smiled and showed Sam the place. He just steps aside and lets him work, after watching for some time, Lance leaves to do his. 

After who knows how long, when Lance has his rest time and he's doing his usual stretching routine - split, bending, dancer pose, camel pose and everything that stretches out his muscles - and losing himself in the satisfying feeling of his muscles shifting beneath his skin, is when Sam comes in. His eyes grow wide when he sees Lance. It's understandable because he only has his arms, chin, foot and shoulders on the ground while his hips are above his head and yeah, his foot is in _front _of his face. "Sorry to disturb your... Exercise.." Sam starts and Lance smiles up at him then untangles himself, lying back on the floor and then sitting up effortlessly. 

"No worries, I was just stretching, the Scorpio pose is one of the lasts so I was roughly done," Lance smiles, patting the floor for Sam to sit down "What's up?"

"I found the problem and fixed it up" he sits down and smiles at Lance "There was some unnecessary cross viring that slowed down the flow and took away the power, took away what the screens and lights needed" Sam smiles at Lance, looking in his eyes "It was good work for an inexperienced engineer, good work Lance" he smiles at him and takes his shoulder again.

Quiznak, he wants to make Lance _cry_?!

"And, MG showed me the screens, it's Spanish, right? And hacking? It seems similar..." Sam smiles at him and Lance chuckles. 

"Yes, you caught me. The hacking I use is one of Pidge's method. I saw her doing it a lot of times and I.. Uhm... Copied her program before I left?... And yeah, I learnt how to write codes from her too, back in the Garrison...So I just used what I learned from her to make my own." he smiles fondly at the memories and Sam smiles too but before he can say something, Lance stands up, feeling the stinging in his eyes " Well, let's go so you can see her sooner. "he flees from the room again.

* * *

After they dropped off the lasts of the refugees, it took two movements for Lance's ship to reach the main base of the Blade of Marmora.

They spent that time just right. 

After their little talk, when Sam repaired their system, Lance saw the older man daily. Sam seemed to spend most of his time with Brehjin (they were always tinkering something, but Bren seemed to have fun so Lance was happy to see them). After Brehjin, MG talked with the older human the most, she would not tell him about what but Lance had a hunch that she took lessons from him. Sam is a genius and Lance saw that his team knew it too, Lance was happy to have him on the ship. So yeah, Lance was happy for MG, he didn't know what she wanted to learn but if she enjoyed it then Lance is happy.

Besides Brehjin and MG, Lance talked with Sam too. Not as frequently as them, but whenever he got time. Lance told him stories about Pidge, Shiro, Voltron and a little about how they were doing when Lance was still with them (he may or may not have told him a few things about how to try to convince them to change. Maybe, he even told him ways that Lance wanted to do, but they would have never listened to him. But Sam is different, they will listen to him). In return, Sam showed him little tricks he could use to work better with his tech and to repair easier the damaged parts of the ship. He even learned new tech of the galra, Sam was involved in their research.

It was nice to finally have someone teach him with words he understood and to have the patience to his scattered attention. It felt a little like when he was still back home, before the Garrison, before space. He could even enjoy it when he was not assaulted by the strong grip of nostalgia.

But Lance saw too much Pidge in Sam, he was constantly reminded of their friendship from before... before everything changed. When they were still friends.

Maybe that was the reason that Lance felt relief when they finally reached their destination and he walked down on the ramp. Somehow a weight left his shoulders as he looked around in the familiar hangar.

He felt like he came home when his eyes met with Regris'.

There was a small group of Blades waiting for them because Lance sent out his notice of arriving. It was surprising that they come but it felt good, to be welcomed by them.

Well, until Regris opened his big mouth. 

"Leo! You little zorg! It was time for you to finally show your scrawny butt here again!" he grabbed Lance with strong arms and pulled him roughly in his embrace. Ignoring Lance's weak protests and whines.

Regris laughed out loud, happy to embarrass Lance in front of everybody like the jerk he is.

After some futile tries, Lance settled down and hugged his purple fluffy brother back. "Missed you too you jerk. But I saw _your_ scrawny butt a phoeb ago at the secondary base." Lance smiled, pulled back and warmly waved at the others. He got back warm smiles and some nods.

"True, but you were gone from here for a long time and not everybody leaves this base or met you at the other base. They all missed you too. And they are a little worried, you're overworking yourself!" he smiled but there was a serious glint in his eyes and Lance nodded, scratching the back of his neck with a guilty look. 

"Yes... Sorry, I missed everybody too. And it's good to be back here... do you think Kolivan will let us stay here for a little while for a small rest?" he asks sheepishly and Regris puts an arm around his neck as he starts to walk away from the ship, talking with newly found vigour. And dragging Lance along.

He looked over his shoulder, at MG, Nyanz and Sam, sending them an apologetic smile.

Silently asking MG to take over the finishing touches of their docking. He will make it up to her later.

* * *

Lance prediction was right. 

Voltron knocked on the metaphorical door of the Blade's base only after two quintants after sending the message about Sam out. 

The team said their goodbyes to the older human and chose to go deeper in the base. Until Voltron leaves, it would be hard to explain why are they there without bringing up Lance. After all, the Blade of Marmora is still mostly in hiding.

MG had free access to the server of the base so their little team watched as Voltron reunited with their friend. Most of them didn't see the Paladins before so they were curious.

Lance had complicated feelings as they watched Kolivan leading the Paladins to the briefing room (he could not destroy his past affection towards them but now, there is resentment too). When the door locked after the last of the Paladins, a fierce demand and a strong force demanded his attention, pushing everything else to the background. His head suddenly became loud and hot, a burning force colliding to him. 

It was somehow funny that Red wanted him close more than Blue, but after she closed Lance off and he became the pilot of Red, the fierce red lady was his only support on the ship. Until Blue finally talked to him again but what happened could be not erased. It all was too late, she already broke his trust and tossed him away like the team. Yet, the most temperamental person (can you call a giant sentinel robot cat a person?) is the most loving and gentle to him. In her ways of showing it.

So who is Lance to say no to his favourite red girl?

It didn't take long for him to reach the main hangar where the Red and Green Lion landed. Maybe it was even record-time but who counted. 

Her eyes were dark but he could feel her following his every move and she readily laid down when he reached her. Her nose is before him and her warmth around him. 

He is no Paladin anymore, will she turn away from him in the future? He never thought that Blue would before it happened, how can he be sure that she doesn't do it too?

A low growl sounded, reprimanding him for his foolish thoughts and he chuckled. She will always be his friend. Red trust is hard to gain but once you have it, you always have it, Paladin or not, Lance will always have her. 

She rumbled, agreeing to the statement and he touched gently her nose. He could feel her warmth inside her and he let the flames embrace him. Letting her in his mind so they could talk comfortably.

It was just some small talk. Red was curious about the resistance so Lance told her everything he could. The _only_ thing he got as an answer was a mental head flicking as a reprimand for him to shying away from the responsibilities. After that, he listened to her seemingly endless rambling and lecturing about leadership, control, family and destiny. She tried to get him to see something, something that somehow everybody sees but Lance knows that's not there, how could that be there? Lance was sceptical, Red didn't like it. They reached their usual banter (Lance started to lose it, starting to believe in her if nobody else).

She was pleased as she continued to persuade him.

Her words stopped when Lance heard a door slid open and he looked away from his companion to the newcomer.

And he froze. One hand still on Red's nose and helmet (he needs to thank later to MG for her foresight) on, Lance was looking at an equally frozen Red Paladin's indigo eyes.

One breath. 

Two breath, then-

"Hey! What are you doing?!" came the dumbfounded question and when Keith took his first step towards Lance.

He bolted and ran out of the hangar.

True to himself, Keith followed Lance but he easily shook off his unwanted follower. Lance knew the base better than him and he was always faster than the mullet head.

In the safety of his hiding spot, Lance waited out Keith's patience for searching to ran out and then he slid out and walked down the quiet halls with a knot in his stomach. 

It was to close. He was _not_ ready to speak to them again. Not to _him._

And he certainly doesn't want Voltron to found out he is on board too.

* * *

After his close encounter with a certain hot-head, Lance was extra careful to stay away from anywhere where Voltron could be. Much for Red's displeasure but he could not help it. He finally started to build up some courage and self-confidence, it would all fly out the airlock if he were to speak with them.

So Lance avoided them until Voltron finally left. 

With Sam and, surprisingly, Kolivan on board.

The galra leader asked him in a memo to wait for him on the base so Lance spent that time just right. 

He worked, trained and bonded with the Blades. He felt finally at ease and he even had some rest, taking Regris suggestion to heart. On his ship, always moving and always on a mission, he had nearly only restless periods of sleep and Regris was right that he worked too much. But it was not something he could change, there were just always something he needed to do. 

Not only Lance, but his team also used this time for honing their abilities and rest. The ship was not cramped but there was a lot more opportunity on the base. More thing to do and more people to talk to. 

And Lance talked. A lot. With everybody. About everything. 

That's how he heard some interesting news. It seems Kolivan wants to set free a mining planet (maybe that's why he asked Lance to wait for him) and that Voltron got a slap in the face not long ago. It was not clear why. They didn't know but it was still a fact that quietly floated around the base and this was the reason why Kolivan went with Voltron. They asked for his advice or what, nobody was too sure.

Those news were interesting but Lance was more happier to hear that two of his friends mated and there soon will be a kit in the base. Lance was so happy at the news!

Yes, they are in a war and constant danger but even at the darkest moment, there is love, happiness and life everywhere! Even at the busiest resistance base! 

The kit will have a lot of uncles and aunts. Lance was happy to see the life coming back to his purple-space-cat family.

* * *

Lance was standing at the open door of the briefing room.

Kolivan came back not long ago and he was summoned, so he came. Only to find the leader standing before the lit-up screens, like a statue while the words flew by before his eyes. It was in galran and they moved too fast for Lance to read them, trying only made his head hurt so he stopped and then walked up next to Kolivan. 

"I heard you missed my humble self so I came to help and fill the space in your chest" Lance joked and wriggled his eyebrows. But his lame joke pulled Kolivan out off his thoughts so he counted it as a victory.

"Yes, it's good to see you too Leo." came the calm reply and suddenly two intense eyes bore into him. Lance was confused, did he something bad and Kolivan will scold him? When Kolivan hummed in a satisfied tone, he became even more curious. _What the quiznak was this? _'Do you know Prince Lotor? The current emperor pro-term in the empire."

Now that was a fast change but what was Lance if not adaptive. (Well, a lot of things but he won't dwell on it too much.) He looked at the screens, he still could not read anything in them, and hummed.

"Prince Lotor... I heard some rumours about him here and there, mostly from the Rebels. They say that he is Zarkon's son but he's a half-blood." two things that Lance don't want to think too deeply about, like, how can somebody do _that_ with Zarkon?! And it was even somebody from a different race, did they not have eyes? Urgh, gross. "He was banished but when Zarkon got injured, they called him back but the inner circle, and a lot of purist galra, hates him and despise him... There are some rumours about him conquering planets but treating them differently, the central command thinks he is week because his gentler handling of the colonies. He is different from Zarkon but he can be cruel too. Oh, and he has a very professional silver tongue. This made him well known. The Rebels are wary of him, they don't know what he wants and nobody knows his way of thinking. He is a jack in the box and nobody knows what will happen if he gets more power. That's all I heard about him, why?" Kolivan gave his approving humm and Lance felt when he gave a good answer to the teacher in class. Why was he suddenly tested?

"That's him. Mostly a mystery right now, we are working on getting more information on him but he is very secretive. It's important to decide if he is someone dangerous or trustworthy. As I see him, he could become a great ally or a deadly foe...A jack in the box, just as you said" Kolivan looked at Lance with his piercing gaze. Again. He really did something, didn't he?

Kolivan was silent so long that Lance thought that was the end of this topic but then Kolivan surprised him "he wanted to ally with Voltron. What do you think?" oh, _hello_ second part of the test. Just what is all of this for? Why does his opinion matter? It's Voltron's business.

"It seems like a good idea. And alliance would benefit both sides. Voltron would gain his support and when they help him gain the throne, they will have an alliance with the Empire, meaning that they can finally change it from the inside. On the other side, Lotor don't have much support in the Empire right now so he needs a strong ally to reach the heights he is pursuing. He doesn't seem to be on the winner side of the power struggle, he wants the power Voltron has. But it has some risk. Nobody knows what Lotor really wants and what he will do when he becomes the emperor, they could achieve the peace everyone wants or it can be the start of a new episode of the war. He can be easily lying to Voltron, hard to say... "Lance looked up, silently asking if his answer was correct. It's still a little raw but he can finally think about Voltron like an outsider. He is working on it.

"That's right... It was very detailed, I didn't know you knew about the inner war." Kolivan sounded surprised and Lance chuckled softly.

"Yeah, despite how secretive you guys are, everybody really likes to chatter and gossip." that's how Lance learned a lot of information that he didn't hear before. But it was alright, they only did this in safety and among each other.

"Ah yes... I... Yes" now Kolivan seemed embarrassed and it made Lance chuckle again but then Kolivan quickly got his composure back "What you said are true. As we can tell, it would do good for them, yet, the alliance was _not_ made. It was rather surprising to the Paladins." what? 

"What? Why?" it doesn't seem like Lotor, from what Lance can see, Lotor is opportunistic. If he saw a chance in something he would pursue it... It left Voltron. Why would they reject a proposal like that? Voltron was always too optimistic and trusting.

"Prince Lotor had a term for the negotiation that Voltron could not meet with." now that's weird, what could he want that Voltron could not give? Lance looked up at Kolivan and he saw the taller man looking at him "He wanted to talk with you. When he saw that it's not possible, he left."

Lance was stunned. Why would he want to talk with _Lance _out of all of them? He never met Lotor, he didn't even know about his existence until not long ago. Lance was just Lance, everyone in Voltron is better than him. In _everything. _Why did Lotor want to talk with Lance when there are geniuses around him? 

It is now his fault that Voltron lost a possible way of finally giving the universe peace? Quiznak, it's his fault, isn't it? How can he mess up everything? Now it seems he doesn't even need to be there to mess up something. What the hell is he supposed to do now? Why is he such a fo-

"Leo. Calm down. I want you to listen to me." Kolivan's voice and a firm hand on Lance's shoulder steadied him. He froze and looked up at the taller, Lance is waiting for a scolding but Kolivan didn't seem to be angry or disappointed. No. He seems to be...

_Excited_? 

"This is a new mission for you. Go and find out everything you can about Lotor. We will share with you what we find too but I want you to dig up everything you can. Then, judge him. We need to know where he stands." Kolivan seems so sure that Lance can do it, but _can_ he? "And if you deemed him to be a good ally for us, be the mediator between him and the Blade of Marmora for the negotiations."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this was it? Did you like it? Please leave a comment and a kudo <3  
Tell me what you think <3  
I hope you will stay with me for the next chapter too ^^ I have some more drawings, I will show it to you guys after the next chapter :3


	20. What do I see in me?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After you notice something, you will be always aware of it.  
Maybe it's not always something annoying, maybe it's something that changes everything you thought you knew. 
> 
> And no, Norzg, that's not food. Put it back.

"Go and find the prince, he said. It would be easy for you, he said. Don't worry about it, he said. You're the most suited for this, he said. But why would Kolivan even think this?" Lance was spacing in the holo-room, from wall to wall, without stopping for doboshes already. MG and Brehjin sitting on the other side of the desk, watching him and waiting for the chance to speak up "I mean. We are talking about _me_, why would the prince even want to talk to me? And how should I even find him?! He is second to the Blades in keeping his secrets. Nobody knows anything sure about him! Why does Kolivan think that_ I_ can find out more than them?! They're the Blade of Marmora! I'm just me, I'm not someone who can gather intel like them." Lance, clearly out off it, could not stop speaking. He was trying still trying to get his mind around the idea that he really is suited for this mission. For at least ten doboshes and he's clearly doing a bad job about it.

Then, as he reached the table and looked at the map above the desk, he finally stopped and leant against a chair. 

Kolivan gave him the mission because he thinks Lance can do it. He doesn't want to disappoint him.

He needs to focus.

He needs to think clearly.

Lance sighed while dragging his hand down his face and started to work with the holo-map, his fingers moving fast on the now-familiar keyboard. He could now feel the two set of eyes boring into him, their owners no doubt wondering what happened. Wondering why did Lance's behaviour suddenly change.

Maybe they think he finally lost it but as true friends, they stayed silent, waiting for him to say something. He dragged them in with only a few words and then had a meltdown in front of them, without any explanation. Yet, they gave him time to collect himself without any complaint. He has good friends.

"Okay... Okay." Lance nodded twice and combed through his hair with his fingers, his space-gel keeping it in place yet it's still smooth. "We got a new mission from Kolivan. We need to collect information about prince Lotor, the currently acting Emperor. He is Zarkon's son and his persona is a mystery. There are almost only rumours about him, nobody knew he's existing before this. We need to dig up everything we could. This is a long term mission, we don't need to put all of our resources into it but we should constantly work on it. This mission is of great importance and we need to separate the truths. The blades are counting on us. We are a small group with a few connections so we will go to the Rebel base and stay there for a while. Brehjin, "Lance looked into his shining green eyes" You and Nathajan will go and blend in, gather everything you could in person, talk with everybody and search for everything you can find out about the prince. MG, you will stay on the ship and work with your computers. Search through every database and report you can get access to, if you're hacking, make sure there are no traces. Besides these, listen to every radio you can and again, if you break in somewhere, don't let them notice. I will go and talk with the council, I will get them to help us and I will work from there, I'm sure they will ask for something too." when he got two answering nod, Lance tapped twice on his tablet and the map changed" this is the area where Lotor was spotted the most. The blades gave me everything they got about him, there is a great possibility that his base ship is somewhere in here. We need to get a smaller area to search, I will try to narrow it before we go and search for him personally."

"Personally? Leo, for all we know he can be dangerous, what if he wants to kill you? You said he asked from Voltron to talk with you, but that can be out of malice and not good-will." MG looked at him, concerned for him. Her blue orbs shining in the half-lit room.

"We will know that before we go. This question is exactly what we need to answer. Kolivan wants to ally him if possible, he wants me as middle-man so I need to make sure we can trust him. We will not make our move until it's sure that I will not lead you guys into certain death." Lance smiled reassuringly but it became a weak grimace instead. He was a little too on edge, not believing that he can make this mission a success and not wanting to endanger his friends.

He sighed deeply again. "Anyway. Please send out a message to the base that we will arrive shortly. Brehjin please brief the others, I will go to the cockpit to set our course." Lance smiled weakly and left to do his part.

* * *

Lance docked the ship in a mostly hidden hangar and everybody went on their own ways just as planned. 

Nyanz was in charge of keeping the ship and MG safe, keeping any unwanted guest out of their vehicle. 

Just as he told the others, Lance went in the innermost part of the base to talk with the council. It took him some time to reach there, the base is big and still new, changing every time he comes but eventually, he did find the right place. 

When the guard standing at the door saw him they ran inside, leaving Lance dumbfounded. Somehow today a lot of people are doing this when they saw him. Really, greeting him out of nowhere, starting to whisper as he goes by and runs through a door when seeing him. What just happened? 

He was starting to get on with weird conspiracy theories when the guard came out again and told him that the council are waiting for him. So he shook his head and walked in. He could always find it out later. 

The room was quite big, with a wall full of screens and a giant table in the middle. It had ten chairs around it but not all of them occupied. The third on the right, the first on the left and the one at the upper end are left empty.

The seven different aliens looked at him as the door closed behind him. Different in race, age and experience. All seven of them went through the pains of the war yet here they are, strong and determined to take down the Empire. The leaders of the rebellion. 

"Qeez! How great of you to come! We were just planning on contacting you! What a nice surprise! Come, come, sit down so we can go over everything! There are so much we need to talk! So much to do! No time to waste or throw away! Are eating enough? So thin and bony! I swear we were just at taking you here by force if you don't show up!" he was enveloped in a six-armed hug before he could even blink and was taken to a seat without waiting for his response. The stream of words never ending and never slowing. "We heard some rumours about you and it was so long we saw you! The rumours? Ah! What a thing what a thing! I say you really did good but you should be more cautious! There are a big bounty on your head now! Did you hear? They are so angry, annoyed, frustrated! You did good I say! Always good at biting their ankle, heh? Good, good! You will be biting their necks when they come to their senses! Bite as a nizengey and tear them apart! Good thinking, lad! Are you still holding up? How is your team? I'm sure they make a bite here and there too! What a unique group I say! Bet your giant one likes to bite too, heh? That's good, good I say! But you are so thin! So much bone and muscle! Where's the fat and meat? Are you healthy? Are you eating enough? You know you need to eat to get enough strength to beat them into hjiukabs! Have you enough time to sleep? And the food! You need to eat to get some meat! You are light as a newborn! We will eat! I show you how one eats like a warrior!" she was speaking so fast that he could not even process one question before there is another so he just sat down and chuckled. It was only three times they met before but she's so much like his mother. So full of energy and always calling everyone thin. It's funny when she does it to Nyanz, grabbing him with six hands (making it impossible to escape) making him eat until he can't stand. But thanks to her, Nyanz gained some weight and now his bones and ribs are not sticking out. He looks healthy thanks to her. He became stronger and livelier thanks to her. 

There! There's finally a gap! 

"Xa! Xa! It's good to see you too, all of you. But please stop, you know that I can't answer any of your questions if you don't let me understand them! And you know that I'm originally like this, I'm healthy with my species' scale!" he laughs and pats gently one of the older alien's arm. Thankfully it was not the first time this happened so he had already told her the details, so she let go of him without much complain and sat back down in her seat. The others in the room greet him like nothing happened and Rhaknat, the closes to him, gives him a tablet. 

"Everything you need to know is in that device and you can send out your orders with it too and we will get it to send out further to the right person. Some require immediate attention but there are not so important ones too. I speak in the name of the council, would you kindly help us again, Qeez?" He smiles at the young man and Lance nods and takes the device in his hands. The old reptile-like man was always a straight forward man, ah, reptile(?) so it was easy for Lance to agree. 

"Of course, you can count on me. But I came here to ask for help too by the way." he looks at the seven faces one after another. They own him some favours so he's pretty sure they will agree. "I need to get information about Prince Lotor, anything you can get your hands or claws on" he says lightly but his tone is serious, he needs to make sure they know it's important to him.

He watches as the others share looks, talking without words and then Xa speaks up.

"Prince Lotor? You mean the half-blood who is currently acting Emperor?" She asks warily and Lance nods. She looks like she wants Lance to deny it. 

"Yes, him. I know this is a big favour but please do this for me." he asks them sincerely and Xa's face turns resigned and nods, the others agreeing after her too. 

"We will do as you asked us, Qeez. But it will take some time, the Prince is secretive and cunning." says Fruim, a small, crystal creature, then everybody starts to move. 

Time to work. 

* * *

They gave him a _lot_ to do.

From solving a problem between two groups to making a strategy for their next united mission. Small to big ones. Easier and harder. He even needed to help organize a newly freed planet (Voltron got rid of the galra there but they didn't know what to to do. Or how.). It was a little hard to make the people there understand what freedom means but they eventually got it and joined the rebels, giving them some resources. 

There was everything.

But he did them all. He solved every conflict they threw in his way. He organized work and missions they asked him to and helped the work of the council without a complaint. He just did what he needed to. 

It took him three movements to notice two things.

One, he was sitting at the head of the table and the orders he gave were all carried out without a second thought. Nobody ridiculed his orders or questioned them, they read them and then carried them out with an approving nod in his way. 

Two, he was practically doing the work of a leader. Like, the work of a leader of a giant organization. Like the work of the Rebel's leader. 

But nah, that couldn't be, he was just imagining things. But after he thought about it, he could not shake it off. After all, he _was_ treated like the head of the council. Suddenly he became super aware of everything that going on around him and it made him just more suspicious.

So he asked the council members about it... and the answer he got was not what he was expecting. 

Instead of smiling faces telling him that he was imagining it, he got shy and embarrassed faces telling him that he got them red-handed. Like they didn't think he would notice, like when he fund Hunk at midnight in the kitchen. 

Guilty faces that thought he will scold them. 

It was so very confusing. 

The confusion might show on his face because the eldest of the council, Vron, started to explain it.

"We know that you declined every one of our proposals but we needed your help with it Qeez, you are a third side, a separate person who knows how this all works. You know how to lead an organization and how to make people happy. It was your idea to build this council, it was a great help to us all and it made the rebels stronger but there are still some problems that we can't come to an agreement. When we asked for your help, you solved these problems and in a way we all were satisfied with yet, you always declined a seat in the council... We all agreed that you are the only person who can't see your strength and that's why we are sure you are the only person capable to solve these problems. We asked for your help again and you did everything with precision, results beyond our expectations." The others nodded at his words while Lance became red in his face.

And they can see it because Lance choose to take off his helmet and they can see his embarrassment and this makes him redder! Thankfully, nobody mentions it and Brothra takes the lead from Vron "We asked you this again and again and you refused our offer but please think about it again. We ask you to become the owner of the first seat. We ask you to become the head of the council." His four eyes bore into Lance's and he can see that the others are all looking at him with the same passion.

Why? Why do they want him to do this? He is nothing exceptional, he is just himself, his skills are average. He is nothing special, they are people who could do this way better than him.

He told them so too. 

And he got back a different answer from what he was expecting. Again. 

"Maybe. Maybe you are right. Still, we are asking _you_ and nobody else to take this burden upon himself. We knew that you are fit to this position and now you can see it too, after all, you did all the work we asked you to. You may be average, but this you is what we want here."

"But I only have a small ship at my disposal. We are a small team and I don't have anything I could offer you, I can't even spend that much time here because of my missions. How could I do what you want me to like this? Why would anybody accept if I agree?" This time, Xa speaks up.

"We don't want to restrain you. You can go wherever you want just like before, only, you will get reports from us in cases we need you for the final decision or a solution and you can come here anytime you want, the base could become your base too." That didn't sound too bad... "Qeez, we don't want you for your fleet or strength, we want you here because of what you do. Everybody among the rebels at least heard of you. They know what you do and you always consider them. You see things differently. In a way that opens a new path in this war and that's what we need." She looks so serious. She really means it. They all think like this? 

With this and Red's word from not long ago, Lance really starts to wonder if he could do it. Maybe he really sees things differently? Maybe that was why he could not make it with Voltron. They all are exceptional and talented while he's average. But maybe, being average is not bad. 

Maybe being average is what makes him _himself. _What makes him good with people. Maybe this is why he sees things in a different light. 

Hm... Somehow it not makes much sense. 

But when did he make any sense? He takes what he can for the time being. He has time to see what the others can see. But what is that they can see? 

Everyone looks at him expectantly and he needs to calm down and think things over. He can't do it here. Not with them staring at him. Not when he finally got some self-confidence. He needs to think over this newfound thought, needs to digest it and _then _could he make his decision. 

He abruptly stood up. He almost made Fruim fall from his seat. 

"I need to think this over...Give me some time." without waiting for their answer he took his helmet and left. 

A good walk always helped him. Or not. He just wanted to be alone a little. 

He walked around the labyrinth-like base for some time and he was speechless.

They made an excellent work. Hundreds of ships (and who knows what else) built together into a base, it's like a _city_ in space. It's more complex than most of the space malls he saw before. It's just breathtaking, a moving base where ships can dock or depart freely as they themselves are the parts. Yeah, he gave them the starting idea but they made something fascinating out off it, something so much more that he could even think of. He was fascinated by it.

Lance walked without a destination. He was looking at everything in amazement at first then he turned to the problem at hand. He walked where his feet took him while organizing his thoughts.

Red gave him that lesson about this all before when they were at the blades, how he's shying away from his responsibilities, what would she say now? Well, Lance _knows_ what she would say, after all, she didn't understand why Lance refusing the position. She would want him to take it. He's sure of it. 

Another important part is if he _could_ do it? 

While he has some doubts, the council was right that he's doing this work for some time now. He didn't know it was this kind of work but he really did it. And more importantly, the council was satisfied with it, so he did good, right? He felt like he did good. He had such a great confidence rush with the council, he really felt like he can do it.

Maybe he _really_ could do it...

While he was deep in his thoughts, Lance suddenly stopped in an alleyway, just before a vendor. He didn't know why he stopped. He just felt something as he went by the vendor.

A vendor of animals he never saw before. Some were in boxes, some in cages or some free, just lying there or sitting. They were all beautiful, he never saw animals like them before. Wait, no, he saw that one before...That's a space caterpillar, Pidge showed him photos of them after their separation. And some has some similarities with Earth animals. Like the wolf-like creature with blue fur and a horn. Or the parrot-like bird-thing that has a beautiful green colour but in their beak, they had a lot of too sharp teeth. Way too much, Lance made sure to stay away from them.

Or there was that small black and navy blue scaled sneak with three electric blue eyes. It gave off an elegant vibe but like the 'I can tear you apart if I want' kind of elegant. Like his older sister.

The snake was at the back, in a small and worn out box. It didn't have a price-tag as the others and it looked rather worn out and tired, nothing like the others. As he leant closer to see it better, six eyes locked on him instantly, scaring him and making him take a step back but then he calmed down and stepped closer again. So it was two snakes? Why are they in such bad shape?

"That ijizan is no good" a sudden voice talked to Lance and he looked up at the small alien in the stand. When did they get there? He's sure that they were not there a tick ago.

"What do you mean? What's an ijizan?" as an answer, they pointed at the snakes in the box. Oh, so their species is called ijizan? At least he can pronounce it.

"No good, defective, sick. It will die shortly." came the voice again. "You can buy it but there are no refunds. You brought it, yours. No complaint after." 

"Die? Why? What's wrong with them?" if they are dying then why doesn't they do something?? They should try to heal them! But the shopkeeper looked like there's nothing wrong. The alien just shrugged and looked at Lance silently, waiting.

It was silent for a while, then, Lance finally understood, they are waiting for his decision about buying the snakes or not.

Lance looked down at the snakes and six eyes looked back at him. They were beautiful and looked so much like a smaller boa. The eyes looking at him were intelligent, the snakes already accepted their end. That's not right. They should have a chance for recovery too! 

He could not leave them here to die in this small and cold box. He will try to help them.

"I buy them, how much?" Lance was determined as he looked at the alien and they gave him the price for the snakes. 

It was too much.

So he talked and talked. Tiring out the vendor until he got them with only half of the original price then with the box in his arms, he went to his ship. Maybe MG could help them.

* * *

When Lance finally reached the ship he called for her and she followed him in the guest room. Lance gently took out the snakes from the box and put them on the table. To find out that there is only _one_ snake. With two heads on each end of its body. So...it doesn't have a tail? Or one of the heads _is_ the tail? How can they digest? How can they move? Both heads are individual or they have the same thoughts?

Now this snake is a lot more confusing than before. 

"The vendor said this snake is defective and sick... can you help it?" Lance looked at MG with his pleading voice and puppy eyes. Yeah, this snake, or ijizan, is confusing but they are so nice and beautiful and they just deserve to have a chance _and_ Lance always loved snakes, he really wants to heal it. He wants to help it and let it live a happy life.

"I...I never..." MG looks paler than normal and Lance can see that her fingers are shaking, is she afraid of it? "I'm sorry Leo...I don't know this species...but I could...I could inspect it if maybe I can see the problem?" Yeah, MG never behaved this way, her voice is shaking a little and her tentacles are twitching. She's really scared of it. Something Lance never would've thought but he could accept it, everybody has fears like this. And he now has guilt for making her do this, but there's nobody else he could ask.

"That would be good...thank you MG...and I'm sorry that I ask you to do this." He really is.

"Don't... don't worry, I can do this. But maybe..can you hold its attention on you?" MG asked weakly and started to work.

Lance looked at the snake and bent down to its heigh, then started to talk to it. Both heads turned to him, listening as they could understand him. So Lance talked, he knew that his voice helped MG to stay calm too. 

Who would've thought that his big mouth could become so useful?

After the inspection, MG could not say what the sickness is. Unfortunately, she never saw an animal like this so she could not find the source of their illness. She then fleed from the room, leaving Lance alone with the ijizan. It looked at him and one of its head gently nudged his hand.

He gently stroked it. Lance was dejected but even if he could not help it, he still wants the snake to be happy before the end, to give it some good memories.

So he talked to them more, it seemed that the heads enjoyed it so he talked about anything that came to his mind. From really tasty foods to Earth music, he even hummed a little. At one point, he let it to slid up on his arm, twist on its length as Lance talked. It was a little weird but it seemed comfortable and Lance could still move his arm just fine, so he let it. He went to do some work and think a little more about the council's proposal while chatting without stopping.

When he walked in the kitchen to get some food, Norzg looked at him and then jumped from his seat and ran up to him, looking at the snake with shining eyes.

"What do yah hav' h're?! Isn't it an ij'za'? Whe' did yah get it?" oh, so he knows it. Lance's eyes shined with the new hope. "Did yah b'ought it for dinne'?" Lance pulled away his arm with the snake so fast that his shoulder ached.

"NO!" Norzg's eyes grew big and Lance cleared his throat. "Sorry...but no. I have it from a vendor but they said that it will die...MG tried to find out why but she doesn't know them...Do you know anything?" Lance slowly moved his arm forward. 

"Yah! The' are from my homewo'd! Petty little th'ngs! A' very delici's!" at Lance's horrified expression, he laughed "Gimme, I take a look at it!" he took the snake and only after five doboshes, Norzg looked up at Lance "Th's litt'e gir' does't have elect'ici'y, the food she got made he' sick so she's sta'ing!" Oh! So it's a girl! A beautiful girl with an injured mouth. And...they usually have electric powers?! Ok, Lance needs to stop touching unknown creatures before one of them kills him accidentally. That would be so uncool.

"Can we heal and help her?" Lance softly stroked her two heads while getting his hopes back. What were the chances that she's from Norzg's planet?

"Yah! She jast needs some solu'on a' diffe'ent menu!" Nozrg nodded energetically and Lance broke into a full smile. "Lea'e th' lady with me fo' the time" at Lance's stern look he laughed again "Fo' t'eatment!" he laughed and took her. Lance could only hope that he won't see her back as their dinner.

"Okay, but she's no food Nor" Lance looked at him then smiled "and thank you." He smiled from his heart. Nor answered with a smile on his own then took the snake away.

Now that she's in good hands, Lance can feel his empty stomach, he needs to eat something. And now that she will be better, Lance needs to think of a name for her. While thinking on it, he took a bowl of food, ate it then went to see MG. She was in the cockpit so it was easy to find her.

She looked better now as she was reading reports about Lotor. Lance already went through them and then gave them to her, she's working just as hard as him, what a bunch they are.

Lance smiled softly and sat down beside her.

"The snake is from Nor's home and it's a she." his mouth is running faster than his mind. "He knows how to treat her." he smiled at her and MG nodded "If you don't want to, I will not keep her, we could take her home or give her to someone who will take care of her." Lance really meant it and she could see it in his eyes. MG is more important than a snake and he doesn't want to make her uncomfortable on their ship. In their home.

"I don't have a problem with keeping her" MG smiled "Just... There's a God in my home. Siakzhazhgota, God of the skies and winds. She has a form resembling this God...at first...but now that I calmed down...It's not true. Siakzhazhgota has four wings and only one head and six eyes. And they have four long fangs...She's really different from them, now I see it. I don't know why did I react like that, I'm sorry that I made you worried." MG smiled at him and Lance laughed.

"Well, I would be shocked too if suddenly someone would walk in looking like Medusa." Lance smiled and winked at MG. "We have a new friend then, her name is Cassio but I'm thinking if her two heads should have different names...But I know that she will live you, who doesn't?" Lance smiled and MG nodded. 

"We will see, for now, let's wait for Cassio to get better." she hugged him softly and then looked at him with a puzzled face. "But how did you get her? I thought you have a meeting with the council?" she asked with clear confusion. Lance stood up and nodded calmly.

"Yes, I had. I just took a break and I fund her on my walk. Nothing much. You know, just being at the right place at the right time." Lance's smile turned into his teasing smile and started to walk away, still facing her "So... we now have a new friend and I became a member of the council..._Anyway_...I need to go back to the meeting..." Lance smiled and walked out before MG could stop him. Leaving her there to understand his words. 

It was time for him to step up and accept this turn of the events. 

Lance was always bad at saying no.

And it's time to see himself in a new light. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's it, what do you think? Let me know <3
> 
> Next chapter is with everybody's dearest Hunk <3   
And after that...I hope you will be here to see ;)


	21. How things change

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let's see how's Voltron.  
What happened?  
What will happen?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is nothing much I can say now, just enjoy it <3

Hunk knew from the start that all this is a bad idea. He felt it in his stomach and he should have listened to it. 

Lance sneaking out, then breaking out Shiro with Pidge, Lance and Keith from the Garrison's hands. Then flying into the unknown with a giant blue lion-shaped ship, going through a hole in space and wake up two space elves.

And then they joined a war they never knew about and they were fighting against monsters Hunk never wanted to meet and they killed and injured others. They got injured themselves too but thankfully none of them died. 

And yes, they got some fun sometimes too but it was just a small part of the whole ordeal. The war was bloody and cruel, they saw people suffer and die. They saw things that nobody should. 

This war changed Lance, Pidge, Shiro, Keith and Hunk. Unfortunately, not always in a good way. 

Hunk didn't know Shiro before. But Lance knew and he told him about his hero. Shiro was a great man and sometimes it still showed but the man was broken now. Hunk saw him having episodes, he saw signs of poor sleeping in his face. He saw his prosthetic arm. 

Pidge was a loner as long as he knew her. She always did everything by herself and she rarely listened to others. She started to rely on them a little more but she was desperate to find her family and shut-in personality made it hard for her out here. Pidge was so young, too young for all the things the team went through. 

Lance was a cheerful character on the outside but Hunk knew him for a long time. Lance always worked hard to prove himself to others, to_ himself_ but then suddenly the weight of being a Paladin was dropped on him. Hunk saw that it was hard for him to prove now that there were only seven of them out here but he still tried. But the biggest problem was the team, besides Hunk and Coran, nobody has the traits needed to treat Lance. He was handful and loud, too much for the loners of the team. 

Keith was a mystery to Hunk. He only saw him in classes before the boy dropped out and Hunk never talked with him. He seemed aggressive and short-tempered. Not a good pair for Hunk. As they began to know each other more, Keith didn't seem to be anything else. What's more, his temperament became worse as time went by. 

Hunk always had anxiety. Always tried to stay out of trouble and he barely had someone he hated. Hunk stayed happy and friendly most of the times. It was good that he had Pidge and Lance with him to stay steady and calm even in space. Hunk was always a giant teddy bear according to Lance. 

Now though. Now Hunk is angry, all the time. 

He's angry at everything and everybody ever since Lance left.

He's angry at Pidge's and Keith's hurting comments, at Shiro's lack of understanding and Allura's ignorance towards Lance. He's angry at Lance for leaving and not talking to them, to _Hunk_. 

And yet, he's angry at himself the most.

Looking back at the last few months when Lance was still in the castle, Hunk should've seen the signs.

Hunk was with Lance for years back home. He was by Lance's side so long he doesn't even remember when it started, Hunk saw his best friend's adventures. He saw how Lance's 'friends' got fed up with him and they just threw him away, making Lance leave. How it happened from time to time because nobody cared enough to look a little deeper and behind the mask of Lance's loud personality. How Lance tried to get close to people only to get rejected again and again. 

He saw, sadly only just now, how team Voltron did just the same as the past group of friends, how Lance got drifted away from them. Castaway and branded to be the annoying clown. Back on Earth, this was the time when Lance left to find a new group of people he could hang out with. A new group to try to find friends in. Out here in space, on a ship with only seven people, Lance could not do it. He didn't have a choice, Voltron chained him there. 

Now Hunk can see how Lance tried to break the circle, after getting tossed away, he tried to stand back up and open up more, to get back closer to the others and to change things before it's too late. How Lance tried to make them a family.

Hunk should've helped him. 

Instead, he just looked away and ignored when Lance got more and more insults and he started to become distant again. He chose to shut his ears to his friend's silent screams, to look away from the desperate blue eyes.

At that time, if Hunk just stood up for his friend and take his hand...

But it's too late now. What nobody imagined happened. What wasn't even possible happened. Lance left. The morning they found out was the same as always. Lance left while they were sleeping. He left without a trace. 

And it was like the others didn't care. It made him so angry that he turned away from them and worked by himself. 

Hunk tried to look for Lance. He's still looking for him. Yet he could not find anything no matter where he's looking. He looked everywhere. He called everybody Lance could go to, without success. Nobody saw him or heard from him. None of Lance's friends from other planets knew where he is. 

Hunk even called the Blade of Marmora and asked Kolivan for help. He said they don't know where his friend could be and that they will look for him. That they will look for him and inform him if they found something. 

He lied right in Hunk's face. He's angry at Kolivan and all of the blades too.

When Pidge came running with the revelation that Lance is with the Blades, Hunk wanted to beat them, to dig a hole and bury them. They lied in his face yet Hunk was angry at himself the most. Hunk should have noticed him, Lance was right before their eyes yet they were too blind to see him. Lance helped them out on a mission! He was there, yet he remained silent and let them look over him. Wasn't this enough, why didn't he come back home? Hunk could feel his heartbreak back then, he was in a poor mood for long after that. 

And then it turns out that Coran new where Lance is all along! He was them all time, he saw how desperate Hunk was and he still ignored and stayed silent. It was obvious that Lance stayed in touch with the advisor. They had a good relationship until the end and Coran still had his usual self after Lance left. 

But Hunk couldn't care about it because they finally found out where Lance is. They needed to get to him. But then he got slapped. 

When Hunk and Pidge finally thought they fund Lance, he was already gone from there. Coran and Kolivan still knew where he was yet they were keeping their mouths shut, treating them like they needed to defend Lance from Voltron. From his _friends!_ ...But maybe it was not too off, seeing how they treated him before...

Anyway.

What matters is that Lance slipped away from their grasp and he was gone again. Only those knew where who would never tell them and Hunk was searching again.

For weeks.

For months...

For more than a year...

For too long...

And then Lotor came and he poured cold water all over Allura. Allura got angry and suddenly, she wanted Lance back.

For saying sorry or for murdering him. Hunk was not sure but they could still not find him so he never found out. 

The only happiness he got was that Voltron was not as strong as Shiro and Allura thought would be without Lance. They would never admit it but Hunk knew. The easy missions became hard again and they got injured more because of their poor teamwork.

But seemingly Voltron was the only one having problems. 

While they were struggling, the Blade of Marmora and the Rebellion became stronger. The blades started to make a name for themselves and the rebels became organized. It was on a scale that sometimes Voltron wasn't even needed. Hunk had felt in his belly that Lance had to do something with it, yet he could not find any trace. Somehow Lance was capable of avoiding all of Hunk's and Pidge's attempts to spot him. 

Then Pidge got back his father out of nowhere.

The blade called them that they have a human man but Kolivan would not say any detail about how they find the older human and Sam's answers were vague. Hunk had that feeling in his belly again. They were hiding something. Or someone. 

He had thas feeling more and more.

Hunk could feel something coming, what that would be, he was not sure.

Or it could be his anger finally making him sick. 

Hard to tell.

* * *

Hunk was right, something came. Just not something he could foresee. 

None of them knew it until it knocked on their doors. Until it blew up in their faces. 

There were no signs, Shiro just went insane from one second to the other and tried to kill them and then steal the Black Lion. Well, it was not _Shiro_ but clone-Shiro. It was like a bad horror movie but it still scared Hunk to his bones. He never liked that genre. 

Thankfully Keith chased down the clone and fought with it. When he came back with the body and told the team about the destroyed laboratory with the destroyed drones, the situation evolved from a bad movie into a nightmare. To think there was a laboratory full of clones... 

But there was a good side of it too! Keith learned on his way back that Shiro's consciousness was trapped in the Black Lion after their fight with Zarkon. So they could somehow save Shiro from the Astral plane and make things better. 

It was _reassuring_ to know that an insane clone was spying on them since they defeated Zarkon and they were sleeping with open doors while it was on the ship. Hunk will lock his door from now on. It doesn't matter that the clone is gone now, too many nightmarish things happened in this castle. 

After they talked out how Keith knows if that Shiro is the _real_ Shiro, Allura used her space-elf magic to transfer his consciousness into the body that the clone lest behind. Not creepy at all. Thankfully Shiro woke up and it was a success. Sadly, they all could finally see how _wrong_ was clone-Shiro. Clone-Shiro was aggressive, cruel, angry and hot-blooded, so different from the Shiro they knew. How did they never notice it? They needed to acknowledge that noticing is not something they are good, that was Lance's forte, he noticed if people needed something or something was bothering them. Maybe if Lance would have been with them, he would have noticed. Lance always had a talent for this kind of thing... True, they never really cared or listened. 

But back to their problems, after getting everybody traumatized for life, things got back to normal.

Or close to normal. 

Hunk still could not find his best friend. And Shiro had no memories after the battle with Zarkon so they needed to tell him everything that happened. Including why Lance was not there. It quickly turned into an angry battle between Hunk and Allura. Pidge sided with Hunk and to his surprise, Keith stayed out of it and only listened to them. Shiro tried to stop them, it was something they went through at least ten times already but now Shiro was an outsider instead of supporting Allura. It was strange. And back to Keith, Keith was strange too... Hunk fund him standing in the hanga staring up at Red every day. Not doing anything, just standing there, facing her with narrowed eyes. 

When Hunk funds him there for the sixth time in three days, he had enough. This is too much brooding even for Keith. 

"That's it. What is with you and Red? She's not letting you in again? You look at her like you fund her cheating on you." Hunk crossed his arms and looked Keith with a force in his eyes he never had before. (How does he know how that looks like? Lance once had a girlfriend who cheated and Lance looked just like this after their argument.) Hunk got Keith attention and at his choice of words, Keith looked back at the lion.

"It sure feels like it..." wait, what? How could a sentient lion cheat on him?! "I just...She..." Keith sighed "when we were at the blades to get Pidge's dad, I needed some air so I went on a walk... Suddenly I felt something from Red... When I walked in the hangar, there was a blade with her in. Their hand were on her nose and it looked like they were close...Or... I don't know but she was so _calm_! But when I tried to get closer, the blade ran away and disappeared before I could catch them...after that, I asked her but she won't tell me who that blade was or why was she like that.

She became so different since Lance was her pilot." Keith sighed, he really sounded troubled but Hunk had only one thought in his mind. Keith was still talking about Red but Hunk interrupted him. 

"A blade with Red? Did you see him? How did he look like? Anything?" 

"He? I don't even know if they were a he...I don't know...They were no that tall but they have full armour on, nothing outstanding about them...although now that you asked... Their armour was different from the regular blade uniform..." Keith looked back at Hunk "why? Do you know something? Or do you have an idea?"

"Nothing sure...but you know that Lance spent time at the blades after he left...Sam's tale about his rescue was vague...Maybe Lance was the one who found him and took him to the blades. It would explain why nobody went into details...And that blade with Red? I never saw her being friendly...to anybody other than you and Lance" Hunk looked at Keith meaningfully and he could see as understanding flowed in his eyes. Somehow, Keith seemed calmer now, did something happen to him? 

"You think they were Lance...But...if he was there...why did he run away from me? If he was with Red, he surely knew we were in the base, why didn't we see him? But, indeed, Red is not friendly with strangers...if anybody touches her nose, she would bite their hand off..." Keith's face started to turn white "Shit...You're probably right..."

"I am. I know I am but it was weeks ago...No, months ago. He will not be there now, where could he be now? And Sam...We should talk with him too..." Hunk turned to walk away, now he has a new clue. Lance saved Sam so the man surely knows something. And it makes his earlier assumption sure that Lance is active out there. Yet somehow he manages to stay outside their radar. 

It means he uses an alias. Okay, if he uses an alias it means he could be wi-

"You still want to find him?" came Keith's sudden question and Hunk looked back at him. He crossed his arms and looked at Keith with a strong force in his eyes. This was a sensitive topic for him. 

"Yes. Do you have a problem with that?" his voice was serious and close to aggressive. Hunk was ready to fight about this. He already did with clone-Shiro and Allura. 

"No..." Keith looked a little taken aback and...shy? He looked down and fidgeted with his gloves. "I think...It's a good idea. Since I... Since we got Shiro...the _real_ Shiro back, I was thinking...I said some things to Lance that was really bad... I was angry and... He didn't deserve them." Keith still avoided Hunk's gaze but he looked determined "We all handle differently pain...When Shiro disappeared he was so _indifferent_ like he didn't care at all. He was behaving like he was a leader and it made me so angry. It was so seeing him acting like Shiro... And when we got back Shiro... clone-Shiro, I was so focused on fighting and the war. I was only looking at what he was bad at or lacking... I ignored how Shiro was acting and I was still blaming him... When Shiro and Allura said that he was only a burden on Voltron I agreed... But then he left and everything became so awful. So much worse than when we lost Shiro. We were always arguing... Shiro and Allura turned their anger and impatience towards me and they... They were doing the same to me, to all of us what they were doing to Lance. We could not fight, the Lions became strange. I was blaming Lance for it. It was so cold and angry here... I was alone a lot so I was thinking... And yeah... I regret now some things I did..." Hunk saw Keith's shoulders shaking but he could not say a word, this was something Keith needed to say. "And then Red started to talk to me again, not like before it was more like she was only talking to me to lecture me. She brought up past conversations and situations... Battles, training... bonding or just a small talk after a hard battle. She helped me see some things and I felt...I still feel so bad. Maybe if Lance is back... Things will be back to how they supposed to be." Keith finally looked at Hunk "Red was right. You were right...If there's anything I can help, tell me."

This was not something that Hunk thought he would hear from Keith. When did Keith change this much? Maybe Shiro and Allura got their senses back too? Shiro is... Shiro sure is different but Hunk can't trust Allura in changing, even Coran couldn't get her to listen. 

But right now Keith is here and he's seriously thinking about the team. That's good, but he has some misunderstandings. 

"Lance was not indifferent when Shiro disappeared... He was desperate too but we were in a _really_ bad shape and we needed someone to pull us together...He was always good at adapting so he did what he always does... swallowed his feelings and helped in his ways... I know it looked bossy, I'm ashamed to say but I was angry at him too back then, Pidge was too but he still did all that to support us with Coran." one thing he needed to say, no, there are so many things he needs to say but it's not his to share. If... No, when they get him back, they will talk about everything. "And...Try to look for anything, maybe you can try to get Red to talk? I'm sure she knows something too...Try to find out where he is or what he's doing. You have a better connection to the blades, try to get them to talk. If there's anything else, I will tell you." Hunk nodded at Keith and then went to find Sam. There was nothing else for them to talk right now but his anger eased up a little. 

The older man became very active recently. Hunk will not lie, Sam was acting motherly. 

He always made sure that Pidge is sleeping and eating enough. That Shiro and Keith take care of themselves properly. That Hunk is not overworking himself and sleeps enough. Sam even makes time to help Coran with his chores around the castle.

Sam even started to make them do team exercises and bonding. He started to get them together to improve their bonds, he started making them eat together again and speak more. Only after a little time with them and he was making games and exercises for them that even Allura agrees to do. It's a little scary how efficient he is like he knows perfectly what necessary to get them to listen. Like he knows what they need. 

This is the power of the older generation? Or is it something else? Pidge never told them that her dad even knows these kinds of things. Samuel Holt was a well-known genius back on Earth so Hunk always thought that he's a nerd with bad social skills but he was so off. 

Hunk knew that Sam always accompanied somebody. Right now, Hunk knows that he's not with Keith or him, so his first guess is the bridge. 

* * *

Just as Hunk thought. 

Sam knew Lance but he told them nothing. Everybody who knows Lance stays silent about it. They all have their mouths shut. 

There is only one explanation for this conspiracy. 

Lance is avoiding them. 

It made him question a lot of things and angered him more. Why is Lance avoiding them? Why doesn't he comes home? Is he hates Hunk now? What will happen if they never find him? What will happen if the find him?

He had a small mental breakdown as these questions whirled in his head. After he calmed down, he stood up because Hunk became sure of some things too.

One, Lance uses an alias and he's still in contact with the blades but he's not working with them all the time. Ona and a half, he's not using their base as his either. Two, Lance became a rebel. Hunk would debt his Lion on it. He already had a hunch for it but now he became sure of it. And three, Lance is active and most likely always on move. He was always moving and that made harder for Hunk to track him down. 

From this three, he concluded that they need to find out what Lance alias is.

If they have the name then they will have Lance. 

Easy. _Right? _

The first thing Hunk did was to share his findings with Pidge and she wrote a program to scan through the rebels. Of course, they still needed to work, fight, train and do their Paladin jobs so they were not fast. The didn't have much free time these days. 

Besides the lack of free time, the numbers worked against them too. There were just too many rebels. Like seriously, where were they before? When Allura was making the groundwork for the Voltron Coalition, they didn't find these groups. Where did they all come from?

Pidge and Hunk needed to check every one of them with the scanner, they looked at their history. It was tiring and honestly, it was like searching a needle in a haystack.

They progressed agonizingly slow but they didn't have any other idea. After two months, they knew it was impossible to find Lance this way. There are just too many rebels with a blank past. 

Still, there was no better idea so the continued for another month until needed to stop their search when Matt arrived, bringing the rebel council's request for aid.

A galra commander attacked a star system where some resistance planets were. They attacked the system and overpowered the resisting forces there. The inner war is starting to get out of hands and the border of the Empire, there were more and more cases where the galra fleets want to secure power in systems out of their territory.

Voltron fought off some already but this is the first that the rebels need them. With their new united forces, the resistance fought off and defended their territories. Usually, they can handle the threatening forces on their own, this commander must have a powerful fleet under his command to drive the rebels into a corner.

Of course, Allura accepted the request right away and they started to plan their intervention. Matt shared the information that the rebels had. The fourth scout team was successful got their hands on important details after going in the now war-zone and it told them nothing good.

The galra really was a strong commander, one of the strongest fighting for the throne. And they have a new weapon...and druids. So Voltron needed to make serious preparations. Thankfully not as serious as when they planned to take on Zarkon. 

Hunk said Voltron, but actually, it was something that Coran, Pidge and Hunk needed to mostly do so they had their hands full 24/7. They worked hard, only stopping to eat and sleep when they really needed. In little more than a week, they finished Pidge's new gadget to neutralize the weapon. But they could not rest, it was only two days before they reached their destination. 

* * *

The night before the battle, Hunk could not sleep, he was too anxious. So he went to get some midnight snack. 

With a plate of goo cookies and a mug of cocoa-but-not-really Hunk walked towards the observatory. 

That was when he heard noises through a small gap, a door was open so he peeked inside. Coran and Sam were sitting in the common room on the couch, two mugs sat before them on the table. It seemed they could not sleep either so Hunk decided to not disturb them and turned to walk away when he heard something that made his breath froze. 

"No, he seems fine...said he will re..." Coran's voice was soft so Hunk sneaked closer to the door to hear him better. He's sure he heard a name with L! There are only people that they both know and their names start with L. Why are they talking about Lance? At this time?

"Did he wake up?"

"Once...seemed to...was a lot of pain...needed to sedate...Kolivan said he will need a pro... " 

"I should go ...see if there's something..."

"...want to...be hard...he's.."

"fine...you know..."

"...is...but..."

"..."

"..."

Hunk stood there for two minutes but their voices became so quiet that he could not get out more words. Why can't they speak louder? Curse this small fist-sized gap, he can't hear them clearly. 

But what he heard made him freak out. 

It seems something happened to Lance. He can't make out what! Pain? _Sedate? WHAT HAPPENED TO LANCE?_

He wanted to burst in and shake the two men until they will answer him. But he just stood there, frozen and scared. Something happened to Lance. Coran's voice was worried, as much as he could tell. And they mentioned Kolivan? Lance is with the blades again? And what does it mean that he finally woke up? Something happened, right? 

It's terrible! 

But...

Coran was still here...that means that Lance is alright, right? If there would be something bad then Coran would already be on his way to Lance. So Lance is okay... Lance needs to be okay. 

Hunk needed to concentrate on this. Lance is okay.

Lance is okay.

Lance is okay. 

It's fine. Lance is alive and okay. 

Coran is not panicking, Lance is fine.

Lance is okay. 

Slowly, Hunk calmed down a little. It's okay. 

Lance is somewhere he can't reach but Lance is in good hands and he's fine. 

There will be a battle tomorrow and Hunk needs to focus on that so he can survive and see Lance again. 

Because Lance is fine.

* * *

Lance felt numb.

He felt weird. His head was foggy and he couldn't see anything. He couldn't feel his body either. Where is he? What's happening? 

Wait, he's dreaming? No, he's awake. Or... almost awake. The words in his head were so slow as he was trying to piece together them. As he was concentrating, he could faintly feel his body again. 

A soft pressure on his back, head and limbs...It was so soft...Ah, he's lying on a bed. It felt right the right conclusion but it was still weird. 

Then he started to get a hold on his limbs too, his fingers twitched and he tried to move his hand when there was a sudden pressure on his left hand.

It was a little cold and...soft like it was a doll's hand. His little sister had one when she was young. It's a person's hand though. Who's hand is like a cloth doll? How could a hand be like a doll's? No, it's like cotton...but it's smooth too, like silk. But it's a little rough too. And the hand is slowly moving, ah, it's stroking his. 

He knows this hand.

It's MG's hand. MG. Why is MG stroking his hand? No, she stopped, now she's only holding it again. Stronger than before. 

"..o...me? Leo...can you?" now he could hear her too but what does she want to say? "Leo, can you hear me?" yeah...he can hear her, more clearly now. He tries to tell her too but his tongue feels so heavy and his mouth is dry. He feels like his mouth is full of sand too, his tongue just doesn't want to move inside that desert. But it looks like he answered somehow because the hand on his squeezed his fingers, ouch. "Oh, stars...Leo, can you open your eyes? Please?" She sounds relieved, why? What happened?

Lance started to concentrate on his eyes and although his eyelids felt heavy too, he blinked slowly and searched for her. His head moved too and he could feel his sore neck, how long was he asleep? 

He finally found MG and looked into her blue orbs. She seems tired, happy and sad. Strange combination. She had a smile on her lips but it was weak and she seemed worn-out. 

"Good...you're awake..." she sighed and gently stroked his hand "You may feel confused, it's because we needed to sedate you... How do you feel?" she smiled weakly at him.

"...Sedated?...Numb...tired. Sleepy..." Lance could not feel anything else right now, should he? But he really couldn't, the darkness is already at the corner of his eyes. 

"Yes...The sedative was a little too strong for you but it will wear off...What do you remember?" her hand never stopped its soft stroking but her question was confusing.

What does Lance remember? He started to focus on this. 

He can remember ...Lotor... and a mission. There was something about a corridor... he can't call forth anything else about it. But then ...there was...pain... Burning. Pain, so much pain. Why was there so much pain?

"I'm sorry...That's why we gave you the sedative..." Oh, he spoke out loudly. He must be really out of it to not even notice. "Okay...you may remember later but it could help if I help you recall." yeah, that would be nice.

"Yes please." Lance smiled - or tried to - at MG and she nodded.

"Well, we were just on our hunt for Lotor when the call came..."

Lance shut his eyes as he listened to MG.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How was it? I hope you didn't see it but it was something I was planning for so long :DD  
And we are sooo close to the Lotor part <3  
On the other part, I hope I didn't mess it up with the Shiro part. Truth to be told, I read again what I wrote until now but I still don't remember what was my stand with that so... I hope it was not too big of a mess. 
> 
> Tell me how you feel.  
peace~


	22. Let's see 3.0

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just another drawing to sustain you guys until I'm done with the next chapter <3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't bear to be near a snake in person but I love them. They are beautiful and strong and elegant and cute and everything :D

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "No Cass! I told you already! Play nice with Kaltenecker, you became sisters so you CAN'T eat her."  
"Yeah, I love you too but I can't breathe if you go full anaconda on me, gem" Lance stroked gently Cassio's head while trying to get some air in his lungs.  
"You know I love to spoil you but all these galra and their armour will nauseate you again, sweety" the rebels watched as Lance smiled fondly while wiping off the purple blood of his giant snake's face.


	23. Facing reality is hard

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance was not chosen to be the Blue Paladin by an accident.  
He loves the colour blue. He loves the ocean. He loves to swim.  
He's always changing just like a river. He's always constant like the ocean.  
And just like water, he adapts to his container.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, dears! I finally finished the fixing.  
Have fun ~

As MG voice surrounded him, Lance's memories started to come back.

* * *

After Lance accepted his new position at the rebels' council, his team quickly finished their work, they gathered every information they could and left the base. It was time for their field research.

The most useful treasures they fund were the names of the planets under Lotor's reign and it was time to visit them.

Lotor was busy in his banishment. He has several systems under his direct control and at least sixty planets. That's too much. They could not visit all of them, that would be a waste of time so Lance planned out a course of eleven planets for them to see. Between those stops, they visited swap moons and malls for more rumours.

It went well, the folks they visited were welcoming and friendly so Lance had a great time chatting with them while getting the information he wanted too. It felt like after missions when Voltron was invited to party after successfully. Lance had a great time and sometimes he could even drag out the others to socialize. It was surprising to see how peaceful those planets were and how highly they thought of Lotor, he was a great leader in their eyes. 

But their little trip was not full of fun-times, they met aggressive galra patrols and lookouts one after another. They attacked them, so Lance and his friend fought back. 

But the most important thing was that Lance learned that Norzg forgot to tell him everything about Cassio.

She was a little more than just a two-headed snake. (And Lance doesn't mean that she is beautiful.)

One morning, she scared out Lance from his pants when he awoke to the feeling of being surrounded by something _big_, cold and solid. He opened his eyes only to see nothing, he tried to move but he couldn't and then, out of nowhere, the thing surrounding him _moved. _He could feel it move around him, twist and turn until an eye as big as his fist was before him. No, three eyes. It was Cassio's eye.

Lance's jaw dropped as he watched her move again as she started to shrink!!! When the shrinking stopped, she was four-meter long and her heads were now in the size of his fist. She was curled around him and the only thing Lance had in his head was that Louis would be so jealous if he knew that his little brother has a snake like Cassio. 

This was the time when he learned that she loves to cuddle and she can change her size at will (in order of importance). When Lance was capable to think sensibly again, he was already smitten by her and he was perfectly fine with it.

She seemed to like pet names and everything shiny. 

And she was intelligent. She always knew what size is the best at the moment. Sometimes when Lance worked, she shrank to the size of a pencil (she was so cute!) to watch him. She looked like a toy in that size or like an accessory. Especially when she curled around MG's horn, the two of them looked good together. 

Another thing he learned was that she's deadly. Like, _deadly_ deadly.

Once, when Lance was preparing for his mission, she curled around his leg and he could not get her off until he agreed to take her with him. How can a snake have puppy eyes?! And where did she learned to be so stubborn?

So Lance, Nyanz and Cassio sneaked in the galra outpost. As they walked down a hallway, Cassio slid off his shoulder and went ahead. The first kill was unexpected, she was fast, she pounced and her fangs sunk into the neck of the guard. Lance watched her fight. She used her changing perfectly in battle, when she needed to be small she shrunk and next, she was big enough to bite down a head. Lance watched how a full-grown galra was torn into two and then disappeared in her heads just like Lance used to eat pom bear chips. It was dreadful and amazing. Even Nyanz looked at her differently after that.

But where was he? He lost track for a minute because of his adoration.

Now... He was talking about a galra outpost. Ah yes!

So yes, they did what they needed to do to gather everything about Lotor. Lance would say that his team became very proficient in their work. They grew together more and it made him very proud. 

But after they left the eighth planet, there was a call from the council.

They asked for assistance because the galra attacked a system where several rebel outpost could be found. After they received an emergency call, they lost every connection from there. The rebels sent their scouts three times but nobody came back so they were in the blind.

The council knew that Lance is seasoned in missions like this so they asked him to be the fourth chance. They needed to know what's there. 

So Lance accepted. 

How could he not? He couldn't just stand by while someone is taking out the rebel forces.

But it was a little though for him alone too so he did the only thing he could think of. He called his favourite space cat family and asked Kolivan for some help. Thanks to him, two blades came to help Lance and his team out. 

* * *

Lance navigated the ship as close as he could without getting caught by the enemy's radars. What they found was nothing to be happy about. It was a galra brigade, a quiznacking brigade. Lance could see three big troopers and a bigger ship in the centre of the forces, not mentioning the uncountable little ships flying around those. That ship in the middle looked a lot like Zarkon's mother ship so there must be someone important on it. Most likely a fighting commander is leading this force. It looks like this system fell into the inner war zone too. They will need to do something with it and fast.

But this was not enough. They needed to know more to give to the council for a successful counterattack and drive out the galra again. This sector had a hard-earned peace after the Rebels took over and now this power-hungry bastard came and made everybody's life miserable again, it's not acceptable.

Lance, Nathajan and the two blades, Yktu and Zhoge used the small blade assault ship to reach a galra carrier on the sides. It was a little away from the others and so it was in a good reach for them. Nyanz sulked because he was left behind but he was not good at being sneaky, they wanted to avoid fighting. And Lance had a bad feeling from this mission so he wanted to have somebody back there for extra caution.

With that foreboding weighting down on Lance's lungs, the small team got aboard the carrier and slowly started their search for a monitor to connect up to the server. They made sure to avoid every guard and patrolling sentry and with a little luck, they quickly found one. Lance and Nathajan watched their backs while the blades hacked into the system and with the two experienced spies' lead, they ran back the way they came from to leave.

That was when all hell broke loose and Lance learned once more that he should listen to his intuitions. 

The four of them stopped at a crossroad but it was not because they lost the way. No, it was because of the three druids who surrounded them out of thin air. It was not the best outcome Lance could think of, druids were hard to fight and harder to kill, not to mention three of them at the same time. Thankfully, there were two blades with them and their blades are more effective against those dark witches than anything Lance knew.

With hard-earned instincts, the four of them had their weapons out in less than a tick and they formed a small circle, facing the druids. This was definitely trap, they waited for them and ambushed them when they thought there was nothing wrong. Cunning little bastards, it seems they now know what happened to the other three groups before them.

For two heartbeats, everything was calm, there wasn't a sound as the two groups faced each other, then with a simultaneous move, Yktu, Zhoge and Lance jumped forward and attacked the druids. 

Lance pressed his lips together and aimed with his pistols and shot once, twice, three times while running towards one of the druids. The blue energy bullets never landed on their mark as the druid disappeared then appeared behind him. Lance used his momentum to kick himself off the ground, avoiding a purple beam coming at him. He flipped in the air while his other leg kicked the druid in its side, maybe it was an unexpected move because Lance felt as his leg made the connection. With the little time he won, he could distance himself a little so Lance quickly rolled on the ground after landing and aimed at the druid again. Without time to take a breath, he shot again. 

He was surprised when one of his two shots had hit its mark but he couldn't stop because as a reward, a bolt of purple lightning was sent in his way and he jumped to the side to dodge. The druid seemed to be angered by his two successful attack because it started to shot those bolts of lightning at him one after another and zipped from place to place fast to outplay him. And it was pretty fast, too fast. 

The druid was suddenly behind him and Lance only had time to twist to the side and slash at it with his dagger as a desperate attempt to stop it. He felt the blade dig into flesh but at the same time, he could feel a strong force hitting his head too as he was sent flying. 

To ease his crash, Lance turned in the air as much as he could and crashed into the wall with his side. His left shoulder took most of the impact but his head got a hit too, making him disoriented as he slipped down to the floor. This two hits made him dizzy and he could not stand up in time. Through his blurry vision, Lance saw the druid aim at him when suddenly Nathajan jumped in the picture with her chakrams and attacked the dark wizard. She gave enough time for Lance to get himself together and stand up. He grabbed his blaster and aimed again when the druid had its back towards him, concentrating on Nath. Taking a shaky breath, Lance steadied his arms, then pulled the trigger. 

His shoot struck home, right in the back of the druids head and it disappeared in a blast of bright light. The druid died(?) and there was nothing left after it. Just like every time but it made Lance uncomfortable this time too. It's like they do not really exist, just some dolls filled with quintessence.

Lance nodded at Nath with grateful eyes then they turned towards the other two fight. Nathajan ran to help Ykta while Lance used his whip to grab the hand pointing dark energy towards Zhoge. He pulled it away just in time, the lighting went off track. Zhoge easily dodged and jumped forward pushing his sword through the druid's chest.

It disappeared too. 

Lance turned towards the third druid and changed his blaster to his sword. When the druid zipped to avoid Ykta's attack, Lance was there to struck it but the druid noticed and dogged him. When it jumped again, Zhoge and Nath were there and attacked it again. They cornered the druid and Ykta and Lance finished it together. The two swords pierced through its body and with that blinding light, it disappeared.

With that, the fight was over. They stood in a circle, catching their breaths when suddenly another druid appeared between them and a shockwave surged out of it, sending them all flying. Lance landed next to Nathajan. Lance landed badly on his back and the air was knocked out of him.

Lance pushed himself up and looked at Nath but she was lying there motionless, he could see a crack on her helmet. Looks like she hit her head pretty badly, she most likely lost her consciousness. Lance leant towards her but he didn't have time to do anything because suddenly a hand was around his neck, lifting him in the air. He struggled to get air in his lungs as the druid held him with an iron fist. His eyes turned towards the owner of the fist, only to see the creepy mask of the druid.

The druid is holding him up with one hand (He is not _that_ light for god's sake!). It was different from the three druids from before. The robe looked more elegant, the mask had some carvings on it. And this druid has a pretty horrifying aura around them. It's stronger. Did the druid wait for them to their defence after the fight? This was not good, Lance could feel the cold run down on his back. They need to get out of here fast, this druid is not someone they could defeat without a sacrifice. And Nathajan is out cold, it's only the three of them and Lance is already injured. They need a plan, he can't see Zhoge and Ykta but maybe they can think of something while the druid is busy playing with Lance.

Just like it waited for his thoughts to settle, the druid's voice rang out beneath the mask.

"What an interesting catch...Commander Ugel will be very satisfied. This trap became useful in the end, I started to lose interest with those useless bunch from before. But I finally got something interesting. It's a shame that I lost my apprentices... but in exchange, I got my hands on the prized rat... Hm..." when Lance thought the druids are scary in their silence, he never knew the terror of a talking one. Its voice is like a bad radio transmission. But then it changed and it was smooth and silky, deep and high at the same time. Lance can hear it from the distance and from up close at the same time. It made his skin crawl. He wanted it to never speak again. He wanted to be as far away from it as he could. And 'prized rat'? Does it mean the bounty on his head? Quiznack, it looks like the other teams will not be back at the base. Maybe Lance will not be back either. 

"Kh... What...." Lance tried to speak but he could hardly breathe because of the hand holding him up. His legs were uselessly kicking in the air, trying to kick the druid but he could not reach it. Just how long is its hand?! And it's not even trembling as he holds him up. All the druids are this strong psychically? It's cheating! They are already powerful enough with their dark quintessence voodoo.

"Hm...but what's under this..." the druid ignored his sorry attempt of speaking and suddenly tore off his helmet and tore it off, tossing it aside without care. Its head tilted in something like...wonder as he studied Lance's face. Then, the grip on his neck strengthened "My, my, my. This is my lucky day. Who would've thought that the prized rat is a Paladin? Hm... The blue one if I'm right. I'm right?" the hand loosened a little, waiting for Lance's answer. 

"No... I'm not a Paladin... anymore..." by the end of his answer, electricity ran through him, starting from his neck. Lance couldn't help the scream that tore through him. The dark power ran through him and the hand on his throat squeezed him strongly. 

"Maybe, but you _were_ one. And there wasn't any news about a new Blue Paladin." wait, what? "This is so much better than I thought..." with another wave of electricity, Lance was tossed aside. His body twitched from the energy running in him. "Two treacherous scum, a prized rat who's a Paladin and a useless rat. Not a bad catch. Lady Haggar will be delighted." the druid stood in the middle again and then turned towards Nath. Lance saw the dark energy materializing around its hand and time seemed to slow down as Lance watched the energy shooting towards Nathajan. 

Without thinking, Lance jumped.

He screamed as the energy ripped through him and he fell on his knees, breathing hard. This was a lot stronger than the previous two. He could barely breathe as he lifted his head and looked up at the druid. Lance needed to think... He needed to win some time, the others need to get up. Together they could defeat this druid. Maybe. Still, they need to try or all four of them will die here and he can't let that happen.

Lance needs Ykta and Zhoge. 

"What do... What do you mean 'catch'? And prized rat? Were you waiting for us to come?" the druid seemed to like to talk, maybe Lance could use it. After all, he was pretty good at it too. 

"What do I mean? Obviously, it was a trap for the rebellious rats. For the likes of you. I didn't know who will come but with every little brat that came, we have more subjects to use at the laboratories." jackpot, it started to run his mouth. But... it's still a little frustrating to think this was a trap and he never noticed. He should have, it was too easy for three failure. How could he be so blind? Maybe he became too comfortable, he needs to do something about it if he survives this situation. Oh wait, the druid is still talking. "You're prized, of course, you made lady Haggar frustrated by your little pranks and so she wants to make you pay for it. But I think I will have my round with you before that. Stealing test subjects and toys from us, you caused some minor setbacks. I would not care normally...but I had a personal project amongst them. And that's unforgivable." the druid shook its head and pointed at Lance. He jumped to the side without thinking. 

Luckily, because a black orb exploded where he was kneeling just a tick before. Quiznack, he never saw that attack before but it looked bad. His situation seemed worse by the minute. 

His chest was burning, he could barely move his left arm and his head was dizzy. His vision was swaying and he could see some dark spots in the corners but Lance needed to move. He needed to fight. The druid seemed to be done with talking. It was not too much time but it was still enough for Ykta and Zhoge to get back on their feet. Lance looked at the blades and Ykta quickly made a hand signal. It was the signal of the...attack in turns. Yeah, that's it. Okay, Lance could do that, if they think it's the best strategy then be it.

Without his helmet, Lance needs to take extra care to not get hit on his head and he needs to favour his right side. He is only a fragile human, he needs to be quick and agile. Good thing he's good at both.

With newfound strength, Lance drew his sword and took a stance. 

The druid stood in the middle of the triangle they made but it looked like the druid didn't see any danger. It stood tall and terrifying as it slowly turned towards Lance. When Ykta was in its blindspot, he jumped forward silently and attacked. A fast and powerful swing that Lance could not copy but the druid dodged Ykta's blade and threw another black orb with the smallest flick of its hand. Ykta bent to the side to dodge it and the orb exploded behind him on the wall. Ykta tried to attack again but quickly distanced himself when the druid's hand shot out towards him. 

Then Zhoge rushed in and attempted to injure the druid. He was close, his blade almost reaching the dark creature but it zipped away.

To where Lance was hoping for and he swung his sword as soon as the druid disappeared. He saw as the sword approached its mask but just before it reached it, a shockwave pushed him away a few feets but Ykta was already closing in. The druid zipped as shot a bolt of lightning from the blade's blindspot but Zhoge was there and shielded his friend with his blade. Lance switched to his blaster and fired in rapid succession. Unfortunately, the druid jumped away every time and threw counter-attacks at him and the others for every failed attempt. 

They played this wrong tig for doboshes. It was hard to keep up the druid's jumping speed with his injured body and tired mind but he was full of adrenaline and thankfully, the druid seemed to slow down too. A little, but it was still slower. 

It was then! The druid stayed in place for a tick too long and Zhoge finally reached it, thrusting his blade into the druid's chest but instead of disappearing in that strange light or zipping away, it grabbed him by the neck and pushed Zhoge to his knees with one powerful move. The corrupted quintessence surrounded the druid's other hand and time slowed down again as the ominous energy started to reach Zhoge's face. Lance didn't know what that attack was but he knew in his every cell that it will kill his friend.

So Lance did the only thing that came to his mind. He shouted.

"Hey, old hag!" he almost screamed as he aimed. The black energy turned into a black orb in the druid's hand but at his insult, the hand turned towards him.

Suddenly, everything was fast. There was no time to think, to breath, to move. Lance couldn't dodge, it was now or never. His injured shoulder made it hard to even hold his blaster but he gathered all of his remaining strength to steady his aim. 

Just before the orb left the druid's hand, Zhoge grabbed and pulled on its hand. At the same time the druid's attack went off and Lance pulled the trigger. 

The blue laser bullet hit the druid in the centre of its mask and with the blinding light, the druid was gone. Lance had a tick to feel the relief, they did it, his friends are safe.

And then came the pain.

In the far back of his mind, Lance noticed that he fell on the floor and he heard himself screaming (he thinks it's him but he never heard himself scream like this) but he could not think. He couldn't think clearly. Heck, he couldn't even think anything other than to _PAIN_ and _STOP!_

There was so much pain! Pain pain and pain! It took over everything. He drowned in it and he could not feel anything else other than the burning _pain._ He didn't know where it came from or what's happening around him. His swaying vision blurred and the dark spots grew, taking over everything until there was nothing he could see but darkness. He knew that somehow he stopped screaming because now the only thing he could hear was Zhoge's desperate voice asking for him to stay awake.

Lance wanted to obey him, he wanted to smile and tell him everything's okay but he couldn't, it was too much. The only thing he could do was a weak whimper before the nothingness took over and he lost his consciousness.

* * *

With a sharp gasp, Lance opened his eyes and sat up. Somewhere back in his mind, he noticed that MG stopped talking and that her gentle hands were on his back, trying to calm him down but Lance could not care. He could not think about it, he needs to know.

With a trembling hand, he slowly reached for the blanket and pulled it off himself.

His mouth felt dry, his throat clenched and everything stopped around him. He knew he was awake because only reality was this cruel but he still wished it was just a bad dream. In the next moment, he will open his eyes to a familiar grey ceiling and he will hear Hunk's snores coming from the bed below. He would turn to his side to turn off his orange Garrison clock and pull himself out of bed to start another day in school.

But seconds flew by and he remembered that no, that ceiling is light years away and he will never hear Hunk's snores in the morning and that he will never jump on him to finally get him to wake up and he will never coax him to bake some garlic knots because he needs to relax a little and feel his home's flavours. Because that...that was deca-phoebs... _Years_... ago and now he's fighting in an intergalactic war with aliens he never imagined to even exists and with a past behind him, he's not proud of. He will not eat Hunk's cooking because he's here and Hunk is with Voltron and Voltron's behind him and nothing ever will be like before. Nothing will ever be the same, Voltron was just another group of friends he wanted to belong to but he could not so he did what he needed after fighting for his space for so long. He left. And then he found his true friends, his space family and people who are just as happy to call him a friend as he's happy to call them his. 

He found his place.

Then he felt it again, a warm hand on his _sole_ knee. And there's another, a gentle hand moving between his shoulders, soothing him and he knows that MG is worried sick because he just froze but he can't look away! He can't move, Lance is afraid if he moves, all the strength holding him together will leave him and he will finally shatter into a million pieces.

_'No no no no no no no no'_ the words repeating without end in his head and he can't think of anything else but this endless denying but it's not _enough. _No matter how many times he repeats it, nothing happens, his pleas are not enough to turn things back. To grow his leg back. 

Now he really did it. He needed to go and lose his leg. Right? Why not? It's so _cool_ to have scars, right? Well, note to a past self. Coming to space is sucks. Fighting in a space war sucks. Getting scars sucks. Losing his leg SUCKS!

... 

Ah... 

...

Taking deep breaths, he tries to think.

This is bad, really bad... but he can't just drown in self-pity. There are people wanting him to stay strong, there is his space sister right by his side. Lance needs to stay focused on something else than his freak-out. He was always positive, it was his thing, staying calm and positive in any circumstances, he can't let space take that away. So let's try to see the sunny side...

...

It's harder than he remembered. What positive thing could be in losing his leg? He will never kick his pinky into a door. He will never injure his leg again, no more sprains, no more broken shin, no more fatigue. Now he only needs to stretch his one leg. There will be no feet to feel cold. He will never feel the ground beneath his feet. Or the grass, or the water. Or the sand. He will never stand on the beach back home and feel as his feet sink into the warm sand while the cold water licks his ankle. 

....

It was not the right course. Let's try again.

Go back to the star, just do it with one step, one small step. He's alive, that's something. That attack could've blasted his chest if Zhoge didn't interfere. Thanks to him, Lance and the others are alive and the mission was a success...

Was it? Are they? He remembers that they killed the druid but it was safe after? What happened after he lost consciousness?

With wide eyes, Lance finally looked away from the space where his leg should've been and looked into MG's eyes. The two lights were dim compared to their usual brightness, showing her worry and sadness that Lance can finally see. Seeing her emotions finally gave Lance the strength to try to talk. He could always pretend better if someone needed him to. 

"The others? The mission?" his throat is sore and it hurts. He must have screamed a lot recently. How long did he sleep? And where are they? Now that he noticed, this is not their ship. The colours are different, there is no dark blue light either... it's more...purple? The Blade of Marmora then? 

"Nath and the blades are fine... Nath had a concussion and Zhoge a broken arm with a few broken ribs but Ykta only had some bruises... They are all fine." MG took his hand and held it to her face gently. She seemed calmer but her shoulders were still shaking a little "You scared us through Leo. A concussion... Sprained shoulder, bruised throat and a... " her voice broke and Lance gently pressed his hand to her face more, his thumb gently stroking to soothe her. "The mission... it was a success don't worry... Ykta blew up the ship to get rid of evidence and then we left, the information is already in the hands of the rebels. They are grateful and wanted to see you but we couldn't let them... We needed to come here fast... We're with the blades... I tried to help, to ease your pain and I couldn't even stop the bleeding... We didn't have enough tools to do anything meaningful so we came to the second base as fast as we could. Your... Your leg was in bad shape... _You_ were in bad shape. We weren't sure you will make it but the blades' doctor is skilled... He saved you, they have some very cool tools. But we couldn't save your leg... It was wrecked... Fractured beyond repair... Chunks...Your armour...the flesh, the muscles, even the bones... The others said a druid attack blew up by your knee..." ah, that was the pain... It seems the last attack was not sent out of course altogether. Still, Zhoge saved him, he couldn't avoid that attack even if it came somewhere higher. He could have been dead, was he so close to it ever? Maybe once, when he shielded Coran from the blast Rover made. He always knew he will go down with something big but he never thought that big something is an explosion. "I'm sorry... we couldn't save your leg." MG seemed close to tears, or the tears equivalent of her race.

"I see...I'm glad..." the others are safe and the rebels got the information they needed, now they can go and beat the asses there and help the people. It's good, another positive thing he could think of. But now what will Lance do? He can't fight with only one leg, he will be useless if he stays like this. The council asked him to become something like a strategist and a spy for them, maybe they will still ask for his mind? That's not the best part of him but he can be still useful... "And now?... What will happen?" _to me?..._ Lance couldn't say out the last part loud but he knew MG heard it still.

He needed to know. Better face it sooner... and while he's still in shock, it's easier to handle. 

"Apparently the blades have cases like yours sometimes so they're already working on a prosthetic for you... If you want it. But it will hurt when they need to sew together your nerves and your muscles with it, it's a serious surgery I didn't understand all of it but that part is crucial for the robot parts so it can function properly. Something like... your own leg but in metal, you will not feel the difference much, or they say. My people never had something like it but Kolivan said they got them from the Empire's laboratories, druid works, they function properly for every blade who has one." oh... _OH_... like Shiro's arm. It would've been cool if it's not _his_ leg. "They are almost done with it but they needed to customize it for your size and species so it took some time and we wanted your permission for it... You don't need to answer now, think it through carefully." MG smiled but her offer was unneeded. Lance already knew his answer. There is no other answer, he wants to fight, he wants to stay useful.

"I don't need time. Do it, this is the best option. But how long was I out? So many things happened already... And where did you get a prosthetic? Aren't they, like super rare?" Because Lance is sure that Sendak was cocky about his high and mighty new arm back then.

"A little more than a movement, we needed to sedate you once, it was a little strong. You woke up sometimes but you were out of it for the most of it. Your injuries must be healed by now so don't worry about it... As for the leg... It's a little rare but the blades have a stock artificial limbs for emergencies. They chose one and started to modify it. It looks pretty cool." MG smiled gently at Lance "You should try to sleep a little more. Everybody's worried about you, Kolivan came by but he couldn't stay and Brenjin and Nathajan are away to get us some supplies. They will be back and will come to see you when you're ready. But really, you need to sleep a little more, rest now that the sedative is out of your system." MG smiles and helped Lance lay down once again.

But he couldn't sleep. He was hyper-aware of the missing weight of his leg. He could move what's left from his thigh but it was bizarre. So light and short. And it still hurt, not just his leg, almost every part of his body.

So he just laid there with thoughts flowing around his head until he was too tired and the darkness finally came.

* * *

MG stood up when Leo finally fell asleep.

He took it better than they thought. He calmed down relatively fast too. Still, she saw how badly he reacted when he remembered what happened, seeing him so despaired. She never thought she would ever see him like this, it was scary, to see someone so strong just break down. It took him doboshes to calm down, she tried to help but it was like Leo's mind just flew out of the room into the endless universe. That scared her more. 

Still, he came back and he took it relatively well too. She sighed and tucked away a stray lock from his forehead.

"I never saw him like this... What do you think? Will this be alright? Will _he _be alright?" she looked up at Regris, standing at the wall on the other side of the bed. He stood there and watched them and Leo never noticed, well, she's not sure he saw anything else other than his leg, or the lack of it, and MG. "he was out of it..."

"It will be alright... He will be alright. And we will be there for him to help." MG gently combed back Leo's hair into the style he often used now. "It's just fresh and he's shocked. He will be better when he wakes up again, Leo is strong." she smiled but then she sighed. "We should tell the others that he woke up and agreed to the prosthetic."

"I told you he will agree right away, he's like this since I know him." Regris shook his head and walked to her, patting her shoulder as they walked out of the med-room.

"I still hoped he would consider it. You know, doing something else. Something safer. He could be a rebel just maybe staying in an office? Like me. It would be so much safer..."

"I know, but it's not for him. He would never be satisfied with that. I never saw him staying in place for long, I don't think he can, he would go mad sitting in a chair all day." 

"I _know_. But you heard what Ykta and Zhoge said. That bounty on his head is something seriously troubling if even a druid master knew about it. And it recognized Leo as the Blue Paladin, I hope nothing leaked from that ship...It could turn into a disaster if the galra chose to chase after us." she was on the galra radio as much as she could to see if they are safe but it was still not enough. She was so worried. She's _still_ worried. Leo's finally starting to accept more of himself and he's finally dealt with his past with Voltron. 

"Calm down, it's fine. Let's turn our attention to what we can influence. Leo's identity out of our hands now. But we can help him to stand back up. The prosthetic should be done in three quintants but we're still missing some parts. When will Brehjin and Nathajan arrive?" Regris led her towards the small workshop where the blades' mechanics worked. It was a big room full of engine and robot parts, past projects and future ones. Five blades worked there and they greeted them as they walked to the last desk.

"I think they will be back near dinner time. How's the preparation for the rebel's operation?" it was something Leo worked, she hopes they will use the provided information the best they can. "Voltron will join too?" on the desk was the prosthetic limb for Leo. It was not done yet and they will only be fully done after it's on Leo. Ah, she hopes Leo will be alright. She hopes he will like it.

"Everything's going well. The council got into touch with Voltron and they agreed to help. Voltron talked with Kolivan about it, but we will not take part this operation as Voltron's ally but as the Rebel's. With these three groups, there shouldn't be any problem." He looked down on the mechanical limb, looking at something MG could not understand, this mechanical thing was never her forte "Hm... It looks good, I hope he will like it." Regris hummed and then turned around to leave. Did they come here only for this?

Still, she followed after him. There was nothing she could do here. "He will, after some time. But I'm worried, will this be alright? None of us knows human anatomy... We should've called Coran, he works with humans every quintant. He knows Leo too, he could still help." this is an argument they went through already but she still felt like bringing it up again. They're putting Leo into unnecessary risks. They should've called the altean advisor.

"Maigrughinkhiet, we talked about this. Kolivan made his decision and besides, the advisor gave us every information he had about Leo's anatomy. We know just as much as him." reasonable as always and the same reasons she heard before but still... It's just not enough to calm her. Regris saw it on her face. "And you know that Leo is avoiding Voltron. The Yellow and Green Paladins already know that we know where's he. If the advisor comes without a sound reason, they will follow and it would hurt Leo more. Coran knows what happened, he will come when the time's right." she wants to kick him for being so reasonable. 

Did Leo rub off on her?

Probably. 

Yet she still wants to do it. 

But she stops herself. It's already hard enough to discipline Leo, she can't let his bad habits fester. She needs to show a good example for him, she's older after all.

But he's not here, so she softly slapped Regris with a tentacle of hers.

He only laughed at this, jerk.

"Now, let's eat and you can go back to him and sulk there." Regris laughed and with a soft sigh, MG walked with him.

* * *

For three quintants, Lance could do nothing but lie in bed and not do anything physical. He spent this time mostly talking with MG, Regris and Nyanz. And of course, he spent a lot of time with Cassio, playing with her and showering her with his love.

MG was right, his injuries were mostly healed but his shoulder still throbbed with pain every time he moved his arm and his thigh was itchy.

He didn't know how blessed he was until the sedative completely wore out. That was when the itching started. Little after lunch in his first quintant in bed. It was bad, especially when he didn't have anything to do. That itch under the bandages that he could not stop. 

He didn't know how his thigh looked under the bandages. He only saw the white cloth and he was too weak to know more. He didn't need to know it. He was not sure he could stomach it.

Even with his friends there, Lance had too much time to think. He had nothing else to do while sitting in that dumb bed.

It was so long. It was almost painful to stay in bed for three whole quintants.

But the waiting is done and it's now time to move forward. 

Lance sat in his bed and eyed the purple liquid in the syringe. 

He was not alone, MG, Regris and Nwice (the medic of the Blade of Marmora) stood next to his bed. The syringe was in Nwice's hand.

"So, you give me a shot with that..." he gulped, still looking at the purple 'sedative'. Why is everything purple with the galra? Not just the Empire, even the Blade is obsessed with this colour, he just can't understand. "And I will pass out. Then, when I woke up, I will have the prosthetic..." he never saw that thing before. It was another thing he couldn't look at but he trusted in his friends, if they say it's good then it is. He just needs it to function properly so he can fight. Still... He was a little scared. The whole 'you will sleep until we stitch a new leg on you' thing was pretty bizarre. And Lance is the only one in this base who's human. Do they even know how his insides work? Coran should by now, how he wishes for him to be here with bright smile and beautiful moustache, he could use his calming presence.

He's freaked out. 

Maybe he should just take the sedative and wash his hands. If it's like the last one, then he will feel nothing, even if they mess up the operation he will just slip into the endless sleep. He really hopes Nwice knows what he's doing. 

"Yes, you will be unconscious the whole time but after you woke, there could be phantom pain and there could be effects we don't know about. You will need time to adjust. You will need to learn your way with it to avoid any unnecessary stress." Nwice nodded "Don't worry Leo, I know what I'm doing. You're in good hands." he smiled and while Lance looked in his yellow eyes, he took Lance's hand and gave him the sedative. 

Lance only felt a weak sting and MG helped him to lay down.

He already felt tired and sleepy, the darkness hugging him. 

'Woah...this thing is... fast...' 

* * *

He slowly came back to himself. 

It was better than the last time. At least now he knew where he was and what happened. 

It didn't make anything better.

He felt the weight of the prosthetic, he knew it was there and but he could not feel anything else. It was just there, he knew it. This knowledge turned his stomach into stone. 

He was afraid to look at it. He always loved his legs, they were long and strong. They were beautiful and he learned how to stand to emphasise them and his ass. Lance loved his legs but one of them is gone forever and he has something in its place that he never saw before, something alien, something _different_ and he's afraid to look and acknowledge that it's real. He wants to deny it as long as he can.

"Ah, you're awake. Good, the operation was successful. You shouldn't force yourself, just stay in bed a little and rest." But he can't deny it longer. Great. "I will let Kolivan and your crew know that you're awake, they were worried." Lance opened his eyes and looked at Nwice, then nodded. His throat was sore and his mouth dry so he couldn't say out loud his thanks. Nwice smiled at Lance and left the room, leaving Lance alone. 

Now or never. If he will freak out he needs to take a look now so when his friends arrive, he could be calm. 

Now or never Lance. 

It's just a new leg. It's cool, Shiro has a robot arm and it's cool. Who knows, maybe it's better than he thinks. Maybe the leg is perfect and he will like it. Regris and MG looked like they liked how it looks, if they like it then he will too. _Right?_

Lance heaved heavily and sat up, then pulled away the blanket. Again. 

...

It was...not bad.

It almost seemed real.

You know, not counting that it was black and a quiznacking _robot_ leg!!!

"Shit...shit..." he knew this was a bad idea, he should've denied it longer. He was so NOT ready to see this. He was not ready to see this. "Shit." he needs to calm down. Positive thoughts, he went through this already, he needs to think about positive things.

Lance watched his toes move while trying to find something good. It's a new experience, knowing that they are moving, seeing it but not feeling. He tried to move his feet in circles to test it and yes, his leg moved just like he wanted to but it was still alien. There was no feeling in his leg. It obeyed his want but he could not feel it.

He punched it next. It was a bad move because now his hand hurts like shit.

Whatever it is made of, it's strong. But the pain helped him come out of his spiralling bad thoughts, it was strong and it did what it needed. That's good.

Now that it's done, he can see that it's pretty nice too. It was mostly black with light grey knee and ankle joints. It was all pretty realistic and something he could never have on Earth. There were four, blue pulsing circles in his calf and another two little higher than the knee. He's no expert but Lance would bet that this is a more developed one than Shiro's arm. It seemed to have a more complicated build, it looked strong. The druids are really geniuses to create things like this.

Too bad that they chose to torture people instead of helping. 

All in all, his new leg was nice. Lance would love this leg if it wasn't his, he would compliment anybody with a leg like this. But because it's connected to his thigh, it's hard to not hate it. He knows that he's lucky to have this because he can walk like nothing happened but this is so much more than a scar. This is so much harder to take in. 

Still, he needs to learn to live with it. 

He needs to do what he always did. 

He needs to adapt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's it, please tell me if I still left in something stupid ><  
Sorry, it took so long, but the next is already in the oven and I just hope I can finish it faster for you :D
> 
> Please tell me what you think! I love to read your thoughts <3  
Thank you for staying with me! Please have patience with me, I will not abandon this :D  
<3


	24. Weird foods and weirder new friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I noticed some time ago that a lot of people uses differently the altean time terms. I'm not sure if the translation I use is canon but let's make things clear (because I'm hell-bent on the fact that Lance adapted to the space-time counting and I use it in his pov). Maybe it's a little late but well, better later than never, right? :D  
so...  
tick-second  
dobosh-minute  
varga-hour  
quintant-day  
phoeb- month  
deca-phoeb - year
> 
> Sorry if it was confusing. I don't know why I didn't bring it up earlier.  
Welp, I don't want to hold you up, enjoy the new chapter~ <3

The first thing he did when he saw his team was to hug Nathajan. Lance couldn't stop himself, he was too happy and too relieved that she was fine. It was their first hug, he never hugged her before, she seemed like she wouldn't like it.

How wrong he was. 

After a tick of surprise, she hugged him back and buried her face into Lance's shoulder, thanking for every star she knows that he lives. Lace would not lie, it surprised the hell out of him but warmed him inside. To know she was just as glad that Lance was there as he was glad that she's fine, it felt good. 

And to learn she liked hugs! Man, that was a punch in the face. All this time, he thought she was just as against of hugs as Brehjin. But she was on board with showing affection in psychical ways! Because after that ice-breaking hug, they started to give hugs to each other a lot more! It felt so good, true, she was just as bony as him, but it still felt so good! It was like a switch flipped. Not just Lance, but the team finally saw a more 'human' side of her from then on. And not just her, Brehjin opened up a little more too (not much, he still liked to be by himself) and Lance was glad that his team became stronger again. They grew so much in their time together. 

But let's not rush ahead.

The quintant after their reunion, Lance started his rehabilitation.

It was hard and annoying but Kolivan stated at the start that he would not let Lance out off the base if he's not sure that Lance has a perfect grasp of his new limb. 

Understandable. Totally understandable but still annoying. Lance wanted to go and do his work, not trying to walk without tripping over nothing for two movements.

Yes, he did that for the first two movements of the rehabilitation. Lance needed to get used to the weight and the strength of the new limb. The feeling of not feeling made him trip over everything. He knew where his leg supposed to be but the next thing he knows is that he kicked the ground and face-palmed the floor because his knee was not as high as he thought. He was surrounded with space-ninjas and he was tripping over left and right. It was embarrassing.

But it got better the more Lance walked. And he walked a lot because he wanted to get back fast to being busy. Thanks to his dedication -and constant bothering- after another two movements, he got Kolivan to agree to start the more taxing part. Lance started to run, squat and exercise again, it felt good to finally move his body, to tire himself out and to feel his muscles burn. Through the exercises, he discovered another plus point to the robot leg. Using its strength right, Lance could jump higher and run faster than before. He just needed to get used to it to not overbalance himself. Like when he did a squat and then tried to push up, he pushed too hard and he flew a few feet before landing on his side. Another embarrassing moment in his life.

_Anyway._ After all the exercises, came his favourite, the combat training. His kicks became so strong! And his leg is blade proof. He blocked Ulaz's blade and there was not a scratch on it after! The metal it's made of was not galran but came from one of the mining planets, the same metal Shiro's arm is made of, it was good to know that it was hard to mess it up. Less chance for Lance to lose this leg too.

It was good to train and Lance became himself again after the shock wore off. He wore a blade uniform while training and his everyday clothes any other time. Black cargo pants and boots with a dark blue turtleneck. The clothes came from a swapmoon, it was hard to find something he could wear, most alien clothes were too big for him or were for different body types. The turtleneck had four sleeves before he got his hands on it and adjusted it to fit his form. He wore the pants on the prosthetic so he didn't see it most of the times and if you didn't know what was under the cloth, his leg is no different from the other. He was extremely grateful for that. 

But the biggest part of his clothing is something else. Something he never thought will have and something he will always wear from now on. A blueish silver ring on his left little finger. MG found it at the moon where the clothes come from, pure luck and a miracle if you asked Lance, and she gave it to him. She gave it to _Lance._ The ring was made of flackernoin, she said it came originally from her home planet. A traditional ring of her people. Lance didn't want to take it from her but she insisted, saying that he earned it by saving her and earned at least five more since she knows him and she wanted_ him_ to have it. That she loves the rings Lance made for her and she would be honoured if Lance chooses to wear it.

How could he say no to that? He couldn't, he didn't want to.

So Lance has a ring now and he decided that will take MG to Earth to show her his family, their family because MG is his sister and he knows the McClains would love her as much as he does. 

He just finished his shower after his daily training when he saw a new message from Regris on his device. 

'Come to my room when you're finished.' 

Unusual, but Lance shook his head and headed there, what could be there for him? He sees Regris daily, this should be something important to call him like this and not wait until dinner to talk to him.

Lance smiled while walking, his training is bearing fruit, even now, he can walk just as fast and silent as before, maybe even faster. If it goes on like this, he could convince Kolivan to let him go out for missions sooner than he thought. 

When he reached Regris' room, the door just opened and he walked in. To find not only Regris but MG, Brehjin and Kolivan there too.

Weird, like, really weird.

Well, not MG, she gets along with Regris pretty well, but he never saw Kolivan just visit the blades' rooms like this and there is almost no reason for Brehjin to be here. Still, Lance stepped inside and after the door closed behind him, MG took a step forward.

"How was the training?" she smiled but Lance only nodded as an answer while frowning. She wants to talk about his training now? Here?

He elegantly raised his eyebrow and looked at her, then at Regris, silently sending them his best no-nonsense look he has. Regris smiled with a glint in his eyes and stepped closer to Lance.

"You know that your armour got wrecked in the last mission, right?" he asked the obvious. Of course, he knows, that's why he uses a marmora outfit at training. "We can see how impatient you are to go back to the field so we thought we should surprise you..." Regris stepped to the side and revealed an armour set on the bed. It was laid down on the mattress for him to see. Lance glanced at his friends as he was afraid to say anything, a reassuring nod from Kolivan made him step forward. He slowly walked to the bed and looked down on his new armour. A black undersuit, dark red -almost black- chest plate, arm guards and knee-high boots from a material he never saw before. And a second layer of suit from a strong dark material that Lance can take on with a belt and... he could joint his boots and the chest plate to it? Cool. 

And then he sees the helmet. 

It's simple yet so complicated. It's black on the lower part, where his mouth will be and towards the back, even where his ears are. And the upper part, starting from behind the ears, comes forward with a sharp cheek line towards the nose, in the same dark red as the armour. It has refined curves like his helmet from before but it has two dark eye sockets in the dark red upper part. If he can guess, the lines on the helmet indicate where it could open up to reveal his face if Lance wants to. Double cool.

"Put them on, we want to see you in it first. The helmet was Brehjin's idea, the comdenite metal was Kolivan's, it's strong. I helped with the design but it was mostly MG's and Coran's draft." Regris smiled and clapped heavily on his shoulders as he was left alone in the room to change.

How could he not want to put it on?

Lance was sorry that his armour got destroyed beyond repair and his helmet blew up with the ship because Coran gave them to him for his journey and now this happens.

This... it's just...

He can't even put his emotions into words. To think they not only made a _leg_ for him but they even made an armour as well... and they made it so... _freaking cool. _It looks a little like the cargo suits he saw before on some of the blades but it was definitely made for fighting. And it's not the end of it, they made it in _red!_ Well, black and red... dark red.

Lance quickly changed from his everyday clothes and put on this new set. 

First the undersuit, then the black second layer. He clasped on the belt, fastened the straps on his thighs and zipped it up on his back. Then, he attached the metal parts and took the boots. 

Looking at himself in the mirror, he laughed softly. The second layer is definitely MG's design, she knows how much Lance loves to emphasize his arse and legs and it's perfect for that aside for its technical use. The black material hugs the outer sides of his thighs and his sides before coming together at waist high and protects his stomach before parting again and doing up to his shoulders, making possible for the chest piece and shoulder armour to clasp on.

She understands beauty.

After making sure all the parts are on correctly, Lance had put on the helmet. It made his breath stop because as it powered up, two red circles appeared in the black eye sockets. It looked almost scary. 

No, not almost. The full set looked pretty scary actually. He was black with a hint of dark red that just made him look...dangerous. It was perfect for stealth but it has colour. And it was not purple! It must've been hard to get this, what did Regris say, comdenite, when the galra only uses purple. But it still looks a little scary, like the Blade of Marmora uniform. 

Just as he was deep in thoughts, the others chose that they gave enough time to him and they came in, Lance turned towards them and took off the helmet giving them his best smile. It was blinding but it was not enough so he hugged them too, gave them all the strongest hugs he could to convey his gratefulness and love to them.

"I love it. It's perfect! When did you even have time?" Lance laughed and gave another hug to MG. They all seemed to be satisfied with his reaction, Kolivan's lips even turned up a little as they locked eyes. 

"To say the truth, we started before the accident. It was Coran's idea to give you an upgraded suit, he helped us make it with the altean technology at the castle. The plan was to give it to you for one of your human traditions, it just became more favourable after everything that happened." Kolivan's voice was calm as always but Lance could see the satisfied gleam in his eyes, the leader was glad. And Coran has a hand in this too? He needs to see him in person, he already misses him. Lance knows that Coran can't just come here any time so they talk every quintant yet he never told Lance that there will be a surprise like this. The messages and calls are not enough.

And it was for a human tradition...?

Just as he was turning his thoughts that way, there was a knock on the door and without waiting for a response, Nyanz, Nathajan and Norzg came in. There was a suspiciously cake-like thing in Nor's hand and Lance's eyes widened as the pieces came together in his head. 

Before he could say anything, he found himself in the strong embrace of Nyanz who even lifted up Lance and spun them around.

"It's the quintant you emerged! Happy womb Earth-day, Leo!!!" Lance couldn't help but laugh at the most absurd 'Happy Birthday' he ever heard. How did this giant learn about this tradition? As Lance knows, the galrans don't celebrate birthdays. 

"It's called _birthday_, Nyanz!" MG sighed and then hugged Lance when Z finally put him down. And to just make it a funny alien thing again- "But we're happy you emerged! Happy birthday, Leo!" she smiled and Lance laughed again, what's with this emerged thing, he can't understand where it comes from but he accepted it happily. Another weird misunderstanding between different races.

After MG, the others came to him too. Nath gave him another tight hug and a kiss to his cheek with Brehjin's small 'Happy birthday" then Regris gave him a half-hug, ruffling his hair whilst pulling away. Norzg and Kolivan both gave him a hearty pat on the shoulder, hugging was not their style. 

How did they even know...?

Right, they did say it was Coran's idea, Lance remembers telling him about Earth holidays after they held a small happy father's day party for Shiro. He can't believe Coran remembered what he told him so far back and the old altean even remembered his birthday. And Earth date that the older man asked for and Lance nonchalantly told him. Even Lance forgot all about it! 

It's hard to believe that he officially became an adult. 21, how he always dreamed about this magic number when he was younger but he never really thought about it after coming to space. There was no reason for him to think about his age, they needed to grow into the shoes of a Paladin. He feels older, much older than 21. Most kids at this age want to finally go and drink legally and celebrate wildly. Lance, on the other hand, has a spaceship, he will never drink nunvill again -should he try another alien liquor?- and his only wish is to finally go back and put his life on the line against the galra again in this war. Coran counted the quintants after a silly tale made out of homesickness and turned his 21st birthday into a quintant worth remembering with funny alien misunderstandings and weird space-cakes.

And don't forget the best space family. 

They're ridiculous and impossible and so awkward sometimes. 

They're the best.

* * *

His little celebration was over when the strange alien cake completely disappeared in Norzg's stomach. Because the bald chef has an appetite that could never be satisfied and he finished it off without a chance for the others to taste it. Luckily, they just laughed as the older man burped contentedly.

Lance received another series of hugs and pats but before Kolivan left, he gestured for Lance to follow. Lance smiled at MG then quickly went after the tall, purple leader. The two of them walked the halls in silence towards Kolivan's office. The silence remained even when they walked in, Lance had no idea what Kolivan's silence meant so he stayed quiet too, waiting for the other to gather his thoughts.

Kolivan sat down behind his chair and looked up at Lance. His piercing gaze running up and down like he's digging up Lance's deepest secrets, it felt like standing before his mama after he made something he shouldn't have. Lance nervously watched him take out his personal device and read through some reports. 

Still, Lance waited, it has to be something serious if Koli is this stern. 

"I see you got used to the prosthetic. I never expected it to happen this fast..." he sighed tiredly "And I'm listening to your whining that you want to go out for missions for a phoeb or so... You could have died that time... you must understand why I didn't let you to go out so soon, so why are you still so determined to go? What is it that you want to do so badly outside?" this is different from what he expected. Is he started to annoy him? No, he seems tired, not annoyed. Then...is he worried? 

"I know but I lived. It was thanks to you guys that I can still stand like this now... And I know that I needed to stay because I was a danger to myself and to my team if I go to the field while I can't walk. It would have been a disaster if I accidentally fell during a fight. But the commanders' war for the throne is pulling more and more systems into ruin and despair. We need to stop them and our best chance to do it is Lotor. We still don't know anything about his motives or his future plans, we need to get in contact with him. It was my mission and I know I'm close to... To something. Let me go, it's not really that dangerous if we lay low and avoid those fights we made before. It's not like we will attack him, it's safe. And I can fight and run just right again. _Please." _yes, he's a little desperate to go but his feelings of being useless are only half the reason. What he said is true. There _are_ bloodthirsty bastards out there fighting each other even now. Lance read the reports, he knows that by now only the strongest left and their fleets are seriously big and strong. The commanders are cruel, they don't think, don't _care, _about the destruction they leave behind each fight.

There aren't enough opposing force to stand up against them or enough resources for damage control. They need to weed out the problem by the roots. And yes, Lotor is fighting for the throne too, but nobody really _fought _against him. They don't know where's he and the commanders are mocking him and branding him a coward for not fighting, but it can't be that. Lotor is cunning, everything Lance knows about him is pointing for something big scheme that's not in motion yet. Lotor chose to lay down and wait for something.

They need to find him before it's too late. They need to know his goals. 

Lance is determined and the only way to show it is to glare Kolivan in the eyes as hard as he could. Childish, maybe, but it's the only thing he could do right now. 

He doesn't know how long they had this silent battle of wills but the first to look away is the purple giant. Kolivan sighs and massages his temple while holding out a small chip to him with his other hand. 

"Read everything on it whilst your training is going on. This chip has everything the other blades found, heard or read in your stead." after another small sigh, Kolivan got rid off the tiredness on his face. "Two movements. Your training is not yet done, it's not negotiable. We will see how you're doing after two movements and _if _I say you're ready, only then, you may go, Leo." Lance took the chip and used his megawatt smile.

"Ok! Thanks, Koli!" and with great enthusiasm, he almost ran out the door. If he has only two movements to prove he's ready, then he needs to work hard in every tick of it.

* * *

Those two movements flew by with his enthusiasm. Lance trained and practised more. Jumping from job to job, always doing something and then collapsing on his bed at the end of the circle.

Every other quintant, he took Nyanz by the arm and pulled him into the training room. They practised together and honed their skills. The giant grey fluffy was strong but because of the arena, his style could not bring out his full potential. They worked hard to clean up his moves. 

Training was nice and Lance enjoyed the work-out. It seemed like he had infinite energy in his small body and he could not stay still. He needed to move, to think about something practical or to not think at all. 

It was easier to cope that way. 

When he needed to rest, Lance sat down with his holopad and studied the new information about Lotor. He strategized and tried to find the fastest and safest way for them to speak with the prince. 

Still, after all, he decided that his previous plan was still the better option. It was best to go to their next destination that was left unattended after the rebel's request. 

* * *

Lance sat on a bench and watched the busy street of the mall. A space mall. A space mall that was built on a meteorite. A big one. 

Zelt-Py was an intergalactic marketplace known to all in this part of the galaxy. It was well known that you can find anything you want there. Be it legal or not so much. The black market was an open secret amongst the costumers.

All in all, it was as peaceful as a busy market could be on the surface. 

And it was the best place to search for people who knew of Lotor. Zelt-Py was in his territory, Lance knew Lotor used to visit to look for whatever Lotor needed to buy. Zelt-Py has the biggest chance for him to find something. So here he was, sitting on a bench, absent-mindedly feeding some green meat to Cassio while thinking of his next move. MG stayed on the ship, Norzg, accompanied by Nyanz, went to get essentials and the lovebirds left together to look around and seek out some whispers. That left Lance and Cassio to go around all day and talk, flirt if needed, with the vendors and everybody who stopped to give him a dobosh. 

Until now, it was fruitless, the only things he heard were rumours he already knew or knew they're baseless. 

So Lance and his girl took a small break, she was hungry and who was Lance to deny some very..._delicious_ looking meat from her.

But the break ended when the cleared bone, too, disappeared in her mouth. Lance found a nice looking stand and an ever nicer looking shopkeeper to go to. It's not like he could freely flirt with anybody with his mask on, but at least he has something good to look at.

Lance still can appreciate beauty. It's a shame he can't really appreciate it at the rebels.

That's how he found himself talking to a nice looking insect-like alien whilst scanning their merchandise. He found some interesting jewels and pretty engines in the size of his palm. Lance played with a small glass-like ball with four rings around it when a gloved hand took it from him, a smooth voice calling out to him from behind.

"A compass? You're not someone who needs one." It was rare for somebody to come so close without him noticing but Lance tried to not show his distress as he turned around.

To meet a dark visor and a definitely galran armour. An armour with orange and blue patterns. The armour he knows belongs to people directly below Lotor.

Is this good or bad luck? Is this a coincidence or they came directly for him? Did Lance walk into a trap? How long was he followed? Shit... He needs to say something. But what? How? If they are Lotor's minion then Lance needs to be careful to avoid landmines. 

He needs to play it off cool. Say something nice, Lance! Say something nice!

"Well, it showed the way to you, isn't it?" Argh!!! But not something like this! Who said to flirt?!

Quiznack... Habits die hard. 

Now he just needs to play it off cool. Turn the tides, lead the conversation, show calmness and confidence. "But what would you recommend then for me?" he leaned on the table, careful to the goods, and tried to read the general before him. Because it's a general, just they have armour with this style. The dark visor made it hard to read their reaction but they didn't say anything and just took something else from behind him. They presented him a small, white crystal and quietly held it for Lance to take. "It certainly is nice but what is it? A paperweight?" Lance mused and the general before him chuckled. 

"It's a vremian crystal, it can detect most poisons in drinks. As you can see, now it's white but when there is something poisonous, it turns black. You just need to dip the crystal and it will change or not, depending on the results." 

"Oh, cool. I take it." Lance nodded then turned back to the vendor, giving them some GACs. Lance smiled to himself and sidestepped the general, he took his crystal from their hand and walked down the street without a goal in mind. He was just curious if they will come after him or not.

His smile turned into a smirk when the general followed him, this confirmed his suspicions. It wasn't a coincide. He was targeted by Lotor and this general found him. Now he just needs to found out if the cause is harmful for him or not. Lotor's follower did not waste their time, they started to talk as soon as they caught up with Lance.

"I'm surprised you changed your appearance. Did something happen? Or you just had some spare GACs, Qeez?" so they _did_ know who he is. But why are they interested in his dressing habits?

"Sorry bro but you need to take me out to dinner before I tell you my wardrobe choices." like he wants to talk about it, he doesn't have a wardrobe just a couple set of clothes he fished out.

"Then, we can go to the food stalls there." the general pointed in the direction Lance was before. Should he accept though? "I pay."

Quiznack, Lance could never say no to free food.

"Okay, lead the way." he nodded and walked with the tall alien. They are taller than Lance, but not as tall as Nyanz or Kolivan. They have long legs and arms, fast and agile in a fight if Lance needs to guess. There's a sword on their hips and a handgun on the other side. Close fighting then if things turn dire.

Lance followed the general and asked for a gyros-looking thingy. Except, it had the green meat he gave to Cassio before, purple salad-thing and some orange sauce. Tall and mysterious asked for the same but with a blue sauce. What's with space food and weird colours anyway? It's some rule to make everything in a colour that screams in your face? But really, that neon blue sauce is a sin on itself. Is it tasty at least? Is the orange sauce tasty? It would be a bliss if it's spicy, oh how he misses the good spicy dishes of his mama.

Oh, the general sat down on a bench. The same bench he sat before, he really was watched! Or is it a coincidence? He shouldn't be too paranoid..but still...Lotor and coincidence aren't two words to use in one sentence.

Lance sat down beside his food giver and watched with great interest as they took off the helmet. 

"Lotor." Quiznack, it wasn't a general but Lotor himself? What does this mean? Did he come to get rid of the annoying bug tailing him? What about the others? Are they safe? Lance is the only he wants or he wants to get rid off of his team too?

Or did he came to just talk? He did buy him food after all.

Ah, does he knows who's Qeez? Lotor knows he's he? 

What to do, what to do. He should say something, isn't he?

"It's a nice day."

What the _hell_, Lance? It's the second time today, just what's wrong with him? One would think he didn't lose his leg but his ability to start a conversation. Going from flirty, to calm to degenerate, what's wrong with him? Lotor smirked at him and looked up at the black sky, does a meteorite have sky? Hm... Wait, it's not the time.

"Yes I believe it's a nice, day you said, day indeed." he looked amused. "But I would like to have some answers from you now." 

"I told you already, dinner first, then, if you were good, maybe I escort you home." Lance joked "But I'm curious. What does Prince Lotor want from me to come in person and take me to a date too?" That's the true question, isn't it? Prince Lotor, who's hard to find, nobody sees him, is here, sitting on a bench with Lance, holding a space-gyros with neon blue sauce. 

Did Lance get accidentally stoned? That would explain a lot.

"As I said, I want answers. Why were you tailing me for movements then disappear for more than a phoeb? Then you're here again, asking after me, trying to find me just like before. By what I saw, you're civil with my men, you steal intel from my ships but you don't attack if you're not attacked first. You seem to have an alliance in mind. Did the Rebellion send you? Or Voltron sent you after me? I don't plan to join in their Coalition if so. Or are you someone else? Who is this Qeez I wonder." This goes far better than Lance hoped. Lotor seems like a guy he could talk to, reason too. But it could be all just a mask, that sweet attitude of his makes Lance's skin crawl. Still...

Should he just try? Or not? 

He should, the faster he knows the better.

MG will kill him.

"No, it wasn't Voltron or the Rebellion that sent me. But speaking of, I have a question too." Lance reached back and pressed the small button on his helmet so the front opened up, revealing the face behind the mask. When Lotor recognized him and his eyes widened, Lance smirked at him. "Why did you want to speak with me at the negotiation with Voltron?" he watched Lotor's face, especially his eyes, it's hard to hide emotions in the eyes. He was surprised, then confused, then he seemed to piece together the puzzle pieces and light shone in his eyes and there was a small, genuine smile on his lips. He was glad? Weird, why is he glad? Was this a bad idea after all? Should he send for the tea-

"It's you! How did I not see before? Of course, it's you, it's all so clear now!" Lance's line of thought was cut down by the sudden outburst of the prince. "How did I not see..." It is so obvious? Yes, it _is. _That's why it's perfect, nobody would think about it because it's too obvious. Just like the prince, even he didn't think about Lance being Qeez. One small victory.

"It's all nice and all. But I still would love to hear why you wanted me to lead the negotiations." Lance nudged the prince and then took a bite out of his space-gyros.

It's pretty tasty and the green meat has a great texture, it's good, he could eat more of it. But he's sitting with _the_ Prince Lotor, he should concentrate on him rather than the food.

And now, that he's so close to the mystery prince, he can finally take a good look at him, better than any picture or records they found about him. Perfect (purple) skin, charming smile with a little smugness in it, stunning indigo eyes and the most silky-looking and shining white hair Lance ever saw. Isn't he Zarkon's son? Who is his mother he got these genes from?! What products does he use to have hair and skin like this in the middle of this godforsaken war? Lance needs to check out his bathroom, he could use some nice moisturising. You know, the type that doesn't burn your face down.

Oh, but mister perfect-hair started to speak while he zoned in on his skin.

"-thus I came to the conclusion that the Blue Paladin would be able to see behind my origins and build a bridge between me and Voltron. It was disappointing to finally meet Voltron only to face that you're gone and the altean princess took on the blue armour. I knew then, that the negotiations would be impossible. Yes, I need allies but I will not submit my people to the fate they would meet if Voltron gains the upper hand in the alliance." Lance slowly munched on his gyros while listening to the prince. He's wary of Allura, Lance could understand that. Allura and the Black Paladin both have some pretty awful hostility towards any galran. Even the Blades. And while they both have a bad past with them, it shouldn't interfere in the future of an alliance. Lance took another bite while Lotor, who didn't seem to mind his nonchalance (or where they are), just went on and on... "I want to create peace and build the universe stronger and better. I'm sure you already saw my work but I believe that we need to stop destroying planets while extracting resources. There are better ways. We need to utilize our knowledge and work together to build better foundations. It's already unacceptable and utterly foolish that dozen of races died off under my father's reign. But those blind bastards who were part of his inner circle can't see it. "Lotor sure loves to talk." They think everybody who doesn't have pure galra blood is below them. They can't think about anything else but blood and destruction. We were always a battle-ready race but at the start of all this, we were good, then the Empire turned dark and rotten with corruption. My father's mind long lost to the corruption of the witch and sadly he built a system that relies on strength and brutality instead of wit and intelligence. With the right leader, we could rebuild the universe and spread prosperity. With our power, we should pull up the other planets and races instead of crushing them under our boots. I have a plan to finally end this unreasonable brawl between the commanders but I need allies, my forces are too few and I don't plan to join in the senseless ravage. My chance is almost here, there will not be a better way than that and yet I can't do it with how the odds are now! The commanders hold too much power because people fear them. The first step is to take that power away from them and then we can stop all this once and for all." Lotor gained momentum with every word Lance listened to and talked a lot easier than Lance thought he would. It feels weird, isn't Lotor supposed to be cunning? Is it a scheme to reveal this much to Lance? With his energetic finale and the way his eyes shine it doesn't seem to be a play.

Space-gyros gone, Lance sized up mister too-perfect-hair. He _has_ a plan but he can't pull it off. 

He seems to want peace sincerely and he values other cultures. Not the usual galran mentality but Lance could count it to the prince's mother side.

But on the other hand. Lotor will surely sit on the throne to rule everything. Will he stick to the principles he's talking now about or would it be all worse and they just handed the crown to another dictator? Lotor seems trustworthy but _is_ he? He's certainly used to talking, he's well known of his silver tongue and he's a cunning snake. If everyone thinks so, it must hold some ground to it. 

Yet, Lance wants to give him a chance and trust him. He loves to judge someone _after_ he personally came to know them. 

Lotor did say he don't have much time to execute his plan. If that plan can stop the inner war, then they need to give it a chance. He should give a chance.

Lance sighed in his head, MG will be so furious. 

"Okay big boy, you took me out for dinner and nobody can say that Lance McClain is not a gentleman. Let me escort you back to where you came from and we can carry on this talk there." Lance gave Lotor one of his best smiles and stood up, then hid his face behind his helmet again.

The prince's answering smile was so false it made Lance regret his decision but he couldn't back off now. 

They need this alliance. 

* * *

"I know my beauty knows no ends but do tell, how did you find me at the shop? How did you even know I was on the meteorite?" Lance was sitting in a too comfortable seat while watching Lotor interact with his generals. The two of them just entered the ship and the four ladies already cornered Lotor to demand answers. It seems his visit wasn't planned. The small blue-haired one's reaction was hilarious when Lance took off his helmet. Her perfectly composed face shattered and Lance could see how her emotions turned from surprised to confused to apprehending to furious and then confused again as to why Lance followed Lotor to the ship. The big one, Zethrid just laughed gloatingly (on who, Lance couldn't tell) and the colourful one gave Zethrid something while grumbling. Was it a bet? It looked like one, what was it about? Lance was so curious but he lost his chance to ask when a space-cat caught his attention and so, he met with Kova and Narti. 

Anyway, Lotor could not flee from their questions and Lance became bored extremely fast after looking around the room he was brought in. It seemed to be the bridge with the controls all around, with the full-sized view screens and the captain seat Lance was half lying on. Before his friends could start to worry about him, he sent a small message to MG, explaining the situation then, finally, he spoke up and stopped the onslaught of words coming from the funny blue one.

When Lotor turned to him and saw where he was, his left eye twitched. Oh yes, Lance saw it, would he comment on his choice of resting place? Lance wants to erase that upsetting smile from the prince's face.

He saw Zethrid's and the colourful one's smug smile too, they seemed to catch on his goal.

Lance decided to pick them as his favourite ones from this team. The blue-haired was too grumpy while the blind one with the cat was too scary for his liking. Lance liked cats but this one seemed evil.

"This market is under my authority. When you suddenly disappeared, I was curious if you would come back or not so I had every possible place where you can go under surveillance. When your ship docked, they notified me immediately. It was easy to find you after that, even with this new style, you have a unique air around you... and of course, the rifle you carry all around. But I must say, you took your time. But if I'm not mistaken, you said you will answer my questions and not the other way around." He really did say that? Somehow Lance is full of bad ideas today. 

He could feel the space-gyros' revenge and now this too...

"Ok, shoot it." Lance nodded after a tick while motioning for them to sit. Of course, he will not get up from Lotor's seat. He wants revenge too and his face still has that smile. It's not because he dared to say he isn't using any lotion or conditioner for his skin and hair. 

Nobody can have space lotions and not share it with him.

Wait, where was he?

Ah right, Lotor and his question. He should pay attention to him.

When Lance focused on mister perfect again, he saw that the prince was looking at him with a blank face. Right, aliens don't always understand Earth expressions. "I mean, go on, ask me." he clarified and Lotor finally moved and sat down... on the edge of his seat. He nearly sat in Lance's lap. What the quiznack?! Is this a way to act in a serious moment?

Like Lance could talk about being serious. He just chose to ignore it then.

"Wonderful. Then, first, tell me, where did you go?" Really? This was what he wanted to know first? Nothing like Voltron's weakness or why he left. Nothing like who sent him or what allies can he bring in. Neither what Lance could tell about the rebellion or if he could give him information. No, the first thing he asks is why did Lance leave and not chase after him? Like a kid who lost his plaything, seriously, Lance is more serious than him! Lotor has a twin who appears before the masses? Or is Lance so non-threatening that Lotor could act like this?

Lance sighs but smiles, why is he so absentminded today? "One of the idiot commanders took over a system so I was asked to take a look." 

"That's it? That took you three phoebs to come back?" Lance rolled his eyes at his complaining. It was so weird, Lotor was _not_ acting how Lance imagined. That twin idea becomes stronger with each passing dobosh.

"No? That only took what, two movements to get there and finish the mission? What took this much time was the rehabilitation I needed to do after taking down a Four Directions druid because they took my leg to hell with them." Lance shrugged like it's nothing. Acting is second nature for him, it's easier to ignore the pain he was in. But boy, was he surprised, to think there was a druid strongest only to Haggar on that ship and the four of them _defeated_ it. 

And they only lost Lance's leg. It could've been much worse, Lance would give his other leg anytime if it means the others are safe. Or if it means they could kill Haggar.

Of course, Lance was looking at their reaction with hawk eyes while pondering. Zethrid shifted uncomfortably on her feet, cat-girl's cat's tail flicked to the side, rainbow girl's eyes widened and blue girl had an intense silent conversation with Lotor. 

He would be thankful if someone would introduce the grumpy one and the rainbow girl. But it seems they didn't know about the invasion of the system or the druid.

"There was a druid with the commander? And a Four Directions druid? Are you sure?" Lotor turned back to him and Lance just nodded. 

"Yeah, its robe was decorated and the mask was different from the other three's too. Not to mention the explosive energy orbs and the quintessence waves they used." when he mentioned the powers, Lotor's face turned grim.

"It really was... And it was with the commander? That means Haggar has a part in the war too. We need to eliminate her too, she may be worse than my father.." the prince murmured then shook his head as if clearing it. "That could wait, next question. Which group do you belong to now? And what part do you play in all of this? I heard that you're a freelancer but others whisper you joined the rebellion. You obviously have ties with them. Can you take me to them? I'm open for negotiations. And who gave you the mission to seek me out?" Lance's smile grew.

"Let's say I'm part of the Rebellion bu-" 

"But you said it was not the rebels who sent you, yes I remember." was the prince always this impatient? Lance rolled his eyes and held up a hand to shut him up.

"As I was saying, I'm with them but I have a close relationship with another group that I can't tell you about just yet. I'm sure the Rebels will be delighted to sit down with you and if you agree, my other party may join in too. I can't say anything else about them now." Lance was serious, the Blade of Marmora was a secret organization for long. They just barely started to come out of their shell and help planets, their name still not known around this part of the universe. Lotor was definitely dissatisfied with his answer but did not pry further. 

"I see, then I will require your assistance with the preparations for the negotiations." Lotor said with his honeyed voice that made Lance uncomfortable. Every time Lotor smiled with that perfect photo smile and spoke with a diplomatic voice that Lance heard Allura use, they made the hairs on his neck stand up. "Then my next question is-" 

"No, no, stop. I can't stand it anymore. This ass-licking voice and that sickening smile make me sick. Stop it, be yourself, or anything, really but stop doing this." Lance blurted out and watched as the smile froze on Lotor's face. Then, it slowly turned into a smug, mocking smile, for the first time, his smile showed teeth too. He seemed more dangerous now, but it was better, it suited him more.

"Not only you took my seat, now you're even criticizing my best behaviour that I put on to not scare you away... Ungrateful, are you?" he sighed dramatically and _woah_, Lance can understand why he used his diplomatic voice 'til now. Now he has a silky voice that sounds way better than that honeyed nightmare from before, but now he sounds like an arrogant bastard. The typical sound you hear when you talk to somebody who thinks they're better than everybody. Usually, Lance had people talking to him with a similar tone just because of his accent and skin. It was the tone of a prick. Lotor is a cocky bastard or it's a galra feature? No, he seems uninterested at the same time, like he's too tired to spare his time on Lance but his eyes shone with interest. Just what is he thinking? "But do tell me, _Lance_. How did you, the Blue Paladin of Voltron, became Qeez, the rebel who likes to anger the druids by wrecking their labs?" Lance chuckled and shook his head. He will have time to figure out Lotor later. At least he sounds like a real person now.

"I think you can understand the feeling of not being enough. Of not being seen properly. I just got fed up by it, I wanted to do more. I didn't want to be left in a room locked up being useless. So I left to do something good. To help in my way." because this is all it's about. Lance could not take the chains around his neck anymore. He was done.

He chose to leave the only place he could've called home because he was too afraid to drown in the words of his supposed to be friends. Too weak to stand up and do something about it. To weak to make them see, to make Voltron stronger. 

Yet, despite him abandoning Voltron and running away like a coward, Lady Luck kissed his cheeks and gave him everything he ever wanted. And everything he didn't know he wanted.

But Lotor didn't need to know all this. 

Lotor is a half-blood prince. He is only half galra, Lance already knows what the commanders think about him. He was never galra enough to his people and too galra to everybody else. That must have been hard for him too. Maybe he became arrogant and cocky because of these. But Lotor still wants to build his Empire stronger, he wants to create peace in the universe, just as Lance wants to help the universe. He could work with that.

Who knows, Lotor could become a great Emperor for all they know.

* * *

Unfortunately, Lance was right. 

After chatting a little more, Lance gave Lotor a communicator and left.

When he stepped inside his ship, he came face to face with MG. An angry MG.

And if you don't believe anything else, you need to believe that an angry MG is _scary_.

She pushed him into the holo-room and he faced her emotional onslaught for vargas! Or what felt like vargas. Still! He was tossed to her like a big bone to the hungry dog and got chewed through. The others left after the first five doboshes without even thinking about helping him and calming their vice-captain! Such treachery.

"I really don't understand! I sent you a message explaining where I went!" he couldn't take it anymore, he needed to defend himself but MG seemed to turn darker with every word he said. Really, her usual light blue skin is almost dark with the swirling smoke he can see somehow in her. How is that even _possible?!_

"The note you sent me saying 'I have a date with Lotor. XOXO' have explained nothing! What does xoxo even mean?! Do you know how I felt when I read it? We didn't know anything about Lotor! We didn't even know if we find him here yet you sent me this! What would've happened if he was dangerous to you? If he killed you? Or worse?! We didn't even know where you were! What would've you done if it was a trap?! You were alone and you still followed him to his ship! What were you thinking?! It was too irresponsible! I have no idea what I would've done if you were hurt! What would've happened to everybody else? Your friends and your family?!" Lance could feel guilt grip his heart stronger with each word. He really fucked up, didn't he? He should've thought about all this but he just went with the flow and followed Lotor. Things felt so light at that moment but she's right. That could've been a trap.

He even showed his face to him. That was really stupid of him. But the worst he did was to scare MG like this, she did not deserve it. None of his friends deserved it. It was not something a leader should do.

Lance looked up at her again, locking his shining eyes with MG's burning lights.

She must've seen something because the next moment, he was in her arms, hugging her tightly and hiding his face in her shoulder. Her grip was almost bone-breaking on him too but he did not care. He messed up big time.

"I'm sorry, I messed up...I didn't think and just went with the flow. Everything was so fast but I should've stopped for a moment and call you guys..." his voice was weak. He meant every word and he needs her to know that he understood and learned from this. There are still so many things he needs to learn as a leader. He pulled her closer to his chest, she needed to know he's here and he is fine. 

"Yes...you should've." her voice was soft, nothing like the ice-cold anger she held before. "But you followed your intuitions and it all turned out well... I'm not saying you shouldn't be yourself anymore..."

"But I'm a reckless idiot all the time" he commented and she laughed softly for his relief.

"Yes, you are, but a _smart_ reckless idiot. But Leo, you need to understand that you are important to us and to a lot of people. You are an irreplaceable part of our lives, you need to get rid of your self-sacrificing tendencies." her grip tightened on him. "Don't you dare to leave me, not now, not like this." she pulled back and looked into his eyes. His were wet but he did not care. With a determined fire, he nodded at her. He will try to change his bad habits.

After a silent staring contest, Lance stood up and pulled MG with him, flashing a winning smile.

"Still, my awesomeness just got us the opportunity to get Lotor on our sides. Another case when my dashing look and perfect personality saved the day." Lance laughed and MG just shook her head tiredly.

"Your erratic personality will be the death of me." she sighed while Lance turned on the holo-screen. 

"You're on this ride 'til the end Maigrughinkhiet, no take-backs." she laughed and took her device from the table.

"Just call Kolivan and the council, we're going to the Cramnis system to prepare for the conference." she left the room without another word.

Lance stood before the holo-map, just organizing his thoughts before calling Kolivan and the Rebel Council. Not long after pushing the calling button, both parties accepted the call and Lance smirked, his eyes shining brightly.

"Start your preparations, we have a white-haired bastard who wants to join us." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm starting to feel like I'm turning everybody into fluff balls. I'm trying not to, maybe I'm just too much of a softie myself ><"
> 
> We're close guys, very close. Stay with me to the end :D  
Leave a kudo and a comment if you liked it! Tell me what you think <3
> 
> Also, it was in this chapter or the previous one, but I love that most of the people call MG MG but Coran always calls her Maigrughinkhiet and he says it perfectly. Lance calls her normally too after he learned to make those sounds and it's something important. And Regris uses her full name when it's serious, just like Kolivan.  
And maybe you noticed, I have some non-canon views of Lotor and his connection to Lance :D you will see more of them later.


End file.
